Why Is Candiace Dillard Bassett So Outspoken About Ashley Darby’s Miscarriage?

Why Is Candiace Dillard Bassett So Outspoken About Ashley Darby’s Miscarriage?

The Real Housewives of Potomac ladies are fighting over the way Ashley handled her miscarriage. 

By Marianne Garvey

Candiace Dillard Bassett says her skepticism of Ashley Darby's behavior at Monique Samuels' Rainbow Party had "nothing to do with her miscarriage," but it kinda seems that way.

"I harbor no ill feelings or disrespect toward women who have experienced miscarriage or fertility issues," Candiace wrote of The Real Housewives of Potomac's explosive episode. "I didn’t see Michael crying or hear their conversation at the table until everyone else did during the episode. That said, I maintain that I GENERALLY question the way Ashley communicates. I find her delivery to almost always be contrived and disingenuous. I felt and still feel she was emotionless in her speech and it doesn’t sit well with me. Does everyone grieve differently? Absolutely. Could her expressions of her experience have been genuine? Sure. EYE am saying that for me, it just didn’t translate as such. I can sympathize with her tragedy and be unsure of her reaction to it. Those are mutually exclusive pieces."

Ashley insists (in the clip above) she was being genuine, no matter what her speech sounded like to Candiace.

Remember, it takes much longer to recover emotionally from a miscarriage than it does to recover physically. Plus, who is anyone to comment on how someone else grieves?

According to American Pregnancy Org, you must allow yourself time to grieve the loss any way you need to. 

"Women may experience a roller coaster of emotions such as numbness, disbelief, anger, guilt, sadness, depression, and difficulty concentrating. Even if the pregnancy ended very early, the sense of bonding between a mother and her baby can be strong," says APO. "Some women even experience physical symptoms from their emotional distress. These symptoms include: fatigue, trouble sleeping, difficulty concentrating, loss of appetite, frequent episodes of crying, broken or suffering relationships with family or friends, or self-harm/suicidal attempts or actions."

Denial and anger are also normal following a miscarriage.

"It’s going to be a difficult thing to accept. Talk with your doctor about what this might look like physically for you. When will your hormone levels return to normal? How long might you still have symptoms for?" the organization adds.

With support and time, you will figure out how to accept your loss.

"Acceptance doesn’t mean that you’re okay with what happened, that you’re not still experiencing a million emotions – it simply means that you confirm in your mind that this is real," the organization concluded. "That doesn’t mean it’s easy from this point on, it just means that you know and understand what you’re dealing with. This is the time that a lot of women and their significant others are able to seek counseling or support groups, or are able to open up about their experiences."

Which is exactly what Ashley is doing — in the way that feels right to her.

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