Tonight I TRIED to bring together this group of Ladies to try a type of conflict resolution that we used in my sorority, Alpha Kappa Alpha. This is designed for people who have a relationship “to come together in a private setting and resolve issues that causes sour feelings."
As the names states, we are taking a sour situation and squeezing (or ironing) out our differences with the end result: LEMONADE (sweetness). It usually involves people who have a willing mind and desire to resolve their differences.
Though tonight, I entered the lion’s den with a bunch of Debbie Doubters who felt like my attempt to make peace is already a failure. The mind is a powerful thing so I guess we were already defeated when they entered the door.
I think there are so many other things these doctors and doctor’s wives could be doing rather than bickering. I tried to maintain my peace and did a lot of deep breathing and allowed the disrespectfulness to roll off my back. Their body language screamed, “I don’t want to resolve these issues.” Why am I even trying? I live by the motto, “DO RIGHT BECAUSE IT’S RIGHT!” Yes, I am a Gandhi-like, Mother Teresa who subscribes to this philosophy.
Dr. Jackie you are truly a class act. Mariah proved what a hypocrite she is by making her deplorable comment about you as a mom. How can she fix her mouth to say that but then be up in arms about her husband and her daughter?
Dr Jackie, these women are not on your level, but I say stay on the show so that you can be the one good representation of a real WOMAN. What Mariah said to you was hurtful, petty and ignorant. It's true that you can't know her PARTICULAR AND INDIVIDUAL feelings, but she didn't have to take it THERE. Toya was definitley in the wrong and all the ladies need to recognize that. At the same time it's time to move on. These women should be raising money for hospitals and charities, highlighting women's issues, volunteering at the hospitals or something!!!!
I don't know your faith but from what I have seen, you walk and talk as a Christian. You are a Blessed woman. God Bless you.
Jackie you come from the position of being a lady, then a doctor, etc. I salute your attempt to help resolve this conflict although we can see Mariah is too delusional to understand and resolve anything. My real intent is to say girl you looked so good in the striped, black and white dress, just amazing. Honestly you are surrounded by a few woman who do not possess the capacity to behave and be what you are, a real lady.
You really have a GOD complex! I don't think that anyone has the right to speak on the behalf of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ on Calvary. It is truly sad that you you think you have the right to judge. A little humility goes a long way.
Amen Dr, Walters,
I agree with you on so many levels. I Do understand the anger that comes from a person whose trust has been betrayed. Mariah feels what she feels......as she should....hopefully, give her time and she can get past it. It does Not mean she needs to be buddies with Toya, In order to keep civility among one another while filming, well, it's the way to go in my estimation.
Mariah has the moral upperhand in this case.
Wishing you ALL, I mean it,
Just remember what you said to Tamar ... You are not the mother of these women! They will have to solve their problem themselves. No one has to explain anything to you. You have good intentions but you are very judgmental at times. You are not the final day in anything with these ladies... Continue to do you ... Make a difference when you can.... Stay in your lane...
dr Jackie, you are better than this get off this show please while you still have your dignity intact
Dr J ackie - lighten-up life is too short....breath than live sister let go let god. I could get to like you if you just lighten-up a bit. Pray about it please.
Dr. Jackie, you must be in debt, because I can't think of any other reason you would associate with this bunch of losers. Please let this be your one and only season. The are damaging your image.
Dr Jackie I admire a woman like you. Just sorry the lemon squeeze strategy didn't work. The ladies just didn't get...shame on them. Mariah has a long way to go before she's up to your standards. I'm really surprised the she and her mom acted. So low class. Keep up the good work in obgyn.
You have a gathering of all the women at your home minus Mariah and Quad. But still want to be considered the neutral one of the pack. Jackie please, you aren't as much of a GOD-Send as you would like the viewers to believe. You're just as morally corrupt as the rest of these delusional women!
Dr. Jackie, I really like you on this you. I like how you carry yourself and how you represent women of all ages and shades. I am sorry Marriah said what she said to you, and she owes you a heartfelt apology. Period.
But I do understand when you are hurt and all around you appear to be against you. People tend to lash out and say things they really should not say.
Your efforts to bring the ladies was a good idea, but the wound was to fresh for anyone to receive it. Toya is the culprit behind the drama at the party, and her efforts to turn all of you ladies against Marriah. That's not right, both women were wrong, and none of you should take sides. Kari should deal with Marriah about their issue together, and not try to do put all of these worms in one basket. They are separate issues, but no one seems to see that Toya is attempting to turn all of you women against Marriah. You guys are ganging up on Marriah. (I am not saying she is innoncent in all of this, but she did not instigate it.)
I hope you can forgive Marriah, and I hope she did not mean what she said. You do not have to give birth to be a mother, and you do not have to give birth to understand all that goes along with it. Marriah do the right thing!
You made an appearance and a comment (I assume you plan on delivering Vince and Tamar's baby) that made my eyebrows raise on the Braxton Family Values reality show Dr. Jackie. Tamar Braxton commented, "She was told 'She couldn't have children by you and others, which is why she had four of her babies frozen. She planed on having a surrogate carry her babies.'" Your response to Tamar's comment (keep in mind while making the response, you brushed Tamar off with your hand) was, "Having another person carry your child ISN'T the SAME as carrying the child yourself." My questions to you is this Dr. Jackie:
Do you think your comment to Tamar offended women who had to use a surrogate mother(s) to carry their child(ren ) Dr. Jackie? I'm sure you meant NO harm, but it came out that way.
Do you really think Mariah was trying to be offensive to you when she said, "You will NEVER know how she feels, because you NEVER had a child?" If a child is harmed, women get a TINKLING FEELING in the area they carried their child(ren) Dr. Jackie. Considering you're a OB/GYN, I'm sure you're aware of these facts. Mariah's comment wasn't a jab against people that adopt. People that adopt can be just as loving and in many cases more loving than the biological parent(s). Mariah's was talking about the biological connection (that really can't be described in words) a mother develops during pregnancy. That connection would make a mother LIFT A CAR off her child (TRUE STORY) without thinking. Keyword: Thinking. I'm sure Mariah meant NO harm Dr. Jackie, but it came out that way.
Do you think your comment about Maiah shouldn't tell her business, if she don't want her business to be told was offensive to Mariah Dr. Jackie? Both Toya and Mariah's daughter was adopted by their stepdads, which is why Mariah shared that information with Toya. Toya was the perfect person for Mariah to share that information with. She probably wanted to know how Toya felt, when and how did she learn she was adopted. Unfortunately, Toya wasn't responsible with the information. I'm sure you meant NO harm Dr. Jackie, but your comment came out that way.
Do you think it was wise to walk out of your own "Lemon Squeeze" gathering Dr. Jackie. You walked out as if THEY ASKED you to participate. No Love, you asked them to participate, knowing they didn't want to do it. The "Lemon Squeeze" was a perfect name for the gathering, because it went SOUR. I'm sure you meant WELL Dr. Jackie and it came out that way. Smooches!!!!!
I understand what you were trying to do with the "SQUEEZE," but you must remember to have an open mind about what is going on. You will sometimes find that the person you believe to be the victim is really the "Trouble-Maker." Besides, what's going on is something that Mariah and Toya will have to work out once things have cooled off. No matter what anybody says, Toya has to apologizes first. She took the first swing and if she can't take a lick, then she should've passed a lick. Always keep trying to find a way to resolve issues that does not include throwing hands, but remember when coming to these sit downs lines should never be drawn if you really want resolve. Dr. Jackie keep being positive, up-lifting, and empowering to all you touch!
Dr. Jackie I like everything you are doing in trying to bring the ladies together. I hope you will be neutral in your dispute resolution should you consider doing it again because you do not start resolving issues by drawing boundaries as you did in your lemon squeeze. You right away divided this women in groups of who agree and that should not be the case if you need people to come together. No wonder it didn't work. But all in all I like you as a professional and give you accolades for your fight against cancer...
quad had nothing to do with it but yet she seems to get herself involved nd btw,she hasnt had any children so how can she understand? according to mariah anyways. that was a sad statement made by mariah and i dont hink toya realizes what she did .if she did anything.becasuse nobody has actually been the adult and just come out and ask her if she did that.and if so,then let her know how much it obviously hurt maraih.i personally think she is over dramatizing myself. and kari was hosting the party ,her things were broke and the check to pay have was canceled. why are you taking it out on her? i dont understand...Maraih keeps saying she is queen bee,is that what this is all about? not all the attention on her now? really????
Dr. Jackie, soror, I understand what you were trying to do; however, it did not work because most of those seated had already formed their opinion that it was MARIAH who was at fault. You all are under the impression that she attacked Toya. Mariah did not attack Toya first. I really can't wait until you all are able to actually see what happened. Toya started it and Mariah responded. Since that time, Toya continued to play the victim and you all have sided with her. All of this would have never started if Toya had not repeated what was said to her in confidence. And then to approach Mariah at the party about her mother in front of her friends?? She could have waited until the next day or at best until they were alone. By then, all of the anger Mariah had been holding in came out explosively!
Another thing, Mariah did not cancel all of the payments to the party. She did stop a payment, but I don't believe all of it.
If you're looking at the show and honestly do see anything wrong with the behavior of not just Mariah and Quad, but also Toya and Kari, then you are not as smart as I thought you were.
Run, Dr. Jackie run... Bravo needs to give you your own show with you and your colleagues ONLY. These doctor's wives are a bust. You are not better than they are, but you are certainly above and beyond. You are the ONLY reason I watch this show.
You are my absolute favorite!!! If it was not for you and Dr. Simone I would have kept changing channels. You are so likable, I think ALL women can relate to you. Anyone to have the privilege to call you a friend is lucky. Blessings to you!
I think you are a strong woman and a savivor. I feel that the reason Mariah said what she said to you was because you did not seem to have simpathy for her child. I know it is a hurtful feeling to not have a child I just miscarried and it was devastating, but I also found out when I was younger that the man I thought was my father was not and that was devastating as well. I felt that when Mariah and Quad came and supported you when you was walking for awareness with cervical cancer that you dissed them, but where was Dr. Simmone, on the side line sitting in her chair, where was kari and toya? I feel like you and Dr. Simmone judge them because they do not act like or talk like you. Maybe they could be the best friend you ever had if you stop looking at there outward appearence and see their hearts. The lemonade was good but the the ice made it flavorless,it was too much hell going on to recognize a good thing. God bless you Dr. Jackie and remember that all things are possible to them that believe in Jesus Name Amen
At the lemon squeeze meeting, Toya stated that she wanted to know why Mariah felt she could touch another women and disrespect her. Here's the problem "touch" can mean something different to someone else. When Dr. Simone was explaining what Toya said at the meeting to her husband and Toya's husband, she changed the "touch" to swung at her. Toya caught what Dr. Simone said but didn't correct her on purpose. Cecil said that he's known Mariah for many years and doesn't believe that she would do something like that. Again, Mariah only touched Mariah's hair, but she never swung at her. Next, Toya threw the glass at Mariah and she was defending herself. Note: Toya touched Mariah's hair earlier at that party.
I believe Toya's purposely not explaining the steps that lead up to the fight.
Dear Dr. Walters, I really like you and Dr. Simone on the show. You both very classy, educated, intelligent and I love your philosophy on life. I have to commend you for how you handled the Lemon Squeeze, even though the results were not what you were hoping for. I did not appreciate how Mariah spoke to you or treated you. I think others here have said all that needs to be said about Mariah. She was being very rude and inconsiderate. One other person on the blog described Mariah as having no class and keeping it real, ghetto style. Unfortunately, I have to agree with that sentiment. What I most appreciate about you is how you were able to keep your emotions in check, after what Mariah said to you. Words cannot describe how much I appreciate you as a person and a Doctor. Perhaps, you could join the cast of the Real Housewives of Atlanta and show Kenya and Phaedra what true class is. I wish you all the best that life has to offer.
I am a healthcare provider too. Gripe at my pts all the the time...yet I am way overdo for my mammogram myself....you made me make an appt.
I thank you for trying to bring these women together. However, it didn't work for a few reasons. First, everyone is still blaming Mariah for the fight. It is very hard to move forward when everyone is still extremely mad at her. I'm not understanding why all of the women are refusing to look at the fight episode tape. It clearly shows that Toya started this fight. Before any blows were thrown, Toya threw a glass at Mariah cause she was touching her hair. But earlier, Toya touched Mariah's hair. Both women handled this badly.
Secondly, everyone is misunderstanding why Mariah was fighting. She was fighting because Toya threw a glass at her not because of what Toya did to her. She was defending herself. She's wasn't sure what Toya may throw next. Mariah mentioned earlier in this fight episode that she was going to avoid Toya at this party, but Toya confronted her.
Thirdly, when Mariah and Quad walked in to the lemon squeeze meeting. Dr. Simone was very cold to her as well as Kari. Mariah is still extremely hurt that no one reached out to get her side of things.
Also Dr. Aydin is very hurt about how he was treated at the birthday party. He's a very nice man.
The sad thing about this is that Toya admits to gossiping about Mariah's family secret with her hairdresser/friend in her home. Who gossips about a child? Somehow this information ended up at the hair salon. Toya is not taking any responsibility for the fight or gossiping about Mariah's family secret. It was not her place to tell anyone. Oh I forgot she did admit that she threw a glass at Mariah. She needs to apologize to Mariah.
However, I do feel that Mariah needs to apologize to you about stating that you do not understand because you never gave birth to a child , etc. at the lemon squeeze meeting. It was very insensitive.
Again, do think the only way for these women to move forward is to apologize and put it behind them.
The truth cause offense but it is not a sin,Mariah did not say anything that was wrong being a mother and actually giving birth is two different thing ,even thought Dr Jackie is a step-mom it is not the same as actually having that child i think Dr Jackie you may have come from a good place in trying to bring the ladies together but watching the tape you make some very hypocritical move by saying you put them in team,I did not like the way you have made it up in your mind to already take side with Toya and did not give Mariah a chance,by saying if you dont want your business spread do not tell it,but that is a wrong statement because i am pretty sure you confide in people you call friend,Mariah only mistake was believing she was a friend,go back and watch the tape Toya was the aggressor who throw the wine and glass in Mariah face,Mariah is human and we do make mistake,i am sorry she embrass her husband but most people would retaliate the same way Mariah did.lets call the thing as we see it .Dr Jackie you felt bad because of what Mariah say but you got into such a sensitive spot be a big girl and deal with it.Have some sympathy for Mariah the point that she made is clear yes her daughter was adopted but that is not the right way for her to find out that was not her biological father.Adult will get over things but it is very hard for a child to get over so easy seeing how some of their peers are so mean spirited.
TXAAJ You didn't have a chance Jackie! Mariah had no intention to resolve anything as you will see when you watch this episode. Her sole intention was to make Toya look bad & try to make everyone feel like she was the wounded party. You are right about one thing for sure. There is practically no reason in the world for women to behave the way they did; especially Mariah's behavior. You have a lot of class & it's a shame you had your ability to have children stolen from you. It's particularly a shame when you consider the kind of example you would set as a parent compared to the example Mariah is setting!
I just want to know if the other ladies knew the rules of the lemon squeee before attending, seems like Jackie is a bit controlling to lay the rules after they arrive, and epect them to stay and freely participate.....
I want to commend you, Dr. Jackie, on practicing what you preach. Out of emotions, Mariah hurled a stone right at your heart but you still attempted to heal the group. You are a strong woman and I know words can hurt, but I want to thank you for keeping yourself together on that very painful moment. I'm sure she will see how her words have hurt you but I am sure she did not think before she spoke...just like Toya didn't about Lauren. All can begin healing with an apology
Mariah was so callous to say that! First of all, does her husband care for Lauren any less since he's her adopted parent, plus you have a stepdaughter, so you are a mom. She is so defensive, insensitive and ignorant!
ClarityDiva Dear Dr. Jackie, I must commend you on your efforts to resolve the problem between Toya and Mariah! It was clear to me that Mariah hurt you deeply when she turned the direction of her pain toward you and your inability to experience natural child birth. She used this idea as a way to discount your ability to have an understanding of her pain. Please find a way to forgive her as she was functioning at the only level she knows how, at the moment. If Mariah possessed true awareness she would know the contradiction her words carried. The pain you must have on the subject of natural child birth is as valid and maybe even more sensitive an issue for you as the pain she states she has over her daughter. Apparently Mariah cannot see pain for anyone else right now, because she is in pain and does not yet know how to handle herself. I am truly sorry for her thoughtless words to you.
Dr. Jackie, Like yourself I am a breast caner survivor. Watching what you say about not having the opportunity to have a baby due to cancer strikes home with me. Even though I was lucky and got to have my son Brendon, a breautiful red-headed Irish looking son, I had put off having a second child because so many people my age were giving me a hard time about working while I had a small child. I didn't have a choice. In 2001 I finally decided that I was going to have more children and do Wheat I wanted not matter what others said. I was having a hard time getting pregnant so my OBY'GYN gave m some mediine that I took for two months. I made a promise that I would gie my 4 year old a brother or sister that year. Two months later I was diagnosed with breast cancer, an aggressive kind that 2001 that gave me a radical mastectomy and a treatment called CEF tthat meant I took cytoxine (?) by mouth (louds of pills) for three months of the year The hardest thing throughout this whole ordeal was knowing I never would have another child. When my sister and sister in-law had children an were pregnant, it was very hard for me. I tried to be happy for them because I really was, but it was extremely hard. I am so sorry you didn't have the opportunity to have a child. It is the best thing in the world. My son, who is now almost 17, blames me for not knowing how to interact with his peers because he had no siblings. I try to love on my substitute teacher children most of them are so sweet but I still cry when a new baby. Of course I try not to and when I see families with little kids my eyes feel with teachers. I think when you go through breast cancer it takes so much away from you, but it gives you small too. I think we have to grow through the steps of grief and unfortunately, sometimes we can't just 'get through' like people or 'pull up ourselves by our bootstraps". Unless you have been through it or close to it you cannot know what it is like. You are a role model for me. Thank you so much. I'm so so this happened to you. This June 1 I will be a Breast Cancer 12 years.l I just took a second dose of treatment of chemo, I finished today.l I now have an autoimmune disease in my eyes and supposedly this chemo treatment has a 75 percent success rates. I am lucky just to have made it 12 years almost. and I really wasn't to make it to 50. After cancer I lost my job of 15 plus years which I haven't been to replace. On thing breast cancer can't take away from you is your hujmor is your sense of humor. I don't know about you because you are beautiful inside and out, but I learned I already know I had big feet, big hands, and big hands, but I learned I had a very BIG head. YOU GO GIRL! You are an inspiration to us all. God bless1
I did not like the comment that Mariah made to Dr. Jackie. Just because she did not birth a child, does not mean she does not know how it feels to be a mother. She is a wonderful mom, I do not like the term step-mother. I feel that you are a mother whether you birthed the child or not. Right on Dr. Jackie keep doing what you dong.
Doctors are the most trusted Professionals. These wives are so unprofessional. Send them all to the Psychiatric Hospital.
#BRAVO to you Dr. Jackie! (no pun intended) With so many negative images of African American women displayed on TV, in mainstream and social media YOU ARE A BREATH OF FRESH AIR!! I truly appreciate the class, integrity and dignity that you possess. You are a positive role model and I hope your presence will serve as encouragement to young women of color everywhere. I appreciate the fact that you attempted conflict resolution in such a positive way instead of instigating a physical altercation or catty gossip. It saddens me that Mariah, Quad and Toya are so caught up in the title of being "Doctor's Wives" that they are incapable of functioning as women of integrity. They have lost their own identities and have no clue about self development and were incapable of receiving the gift you offered them in the lemon squeeze. I appreciate your behavior as well as the behavior of Dr. Simone and Kari but then good behavior does not seem to draw viewers. I encourage you to continue to stay true to yourself and I keep you in my prayers.
Dr. Jackie why waste your time on these women with no class nor self worth. Just stop WE AS Sisters understood where you were coming from.
It's call money can not buy you class. I hope you and the other women Dr. will have your own platform without the crazy.
Bravo needs to get away from this WOMEN OF COLOR GONE BAD.
At the same time your heart, mine did as well. I too could never have my own biological children due to health issues so when Mariah came out and said what she did, I just couldn't stand to look at her anymore. She gives that look like she is the only one who is right and everyone else is wrong, she always has a negative attitude and I'm sorry but she really has NO CLASS considering she is a DOCTOR'S WIFE!! It really is a shame that women have to act like that with one another rather than be supportive. What's easier, having an attitude all the time or being supportive and not thinking that you are the only one that is right? You have a lot of class for doing what you did and walking out because they had no consideration for you whatsoever. You are the classiest woman on the show. They all need to take some lessons from you. I never thought doctor's wives could act so "low!" So what good is it to have all this money, go on expensive trips, get your hair and nails done on a weekly basis, go out to restaurants all the time....IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO ACT THE PART? HAVE SOME CLASS, . WOMEN SHOULD NOT BE FIGHTING ONE ANOTHER. WE NEED TO SUPPORT ONE ANOTHER!! THANK YOU DR. JACKIE FOR SHOWING THE VIEWERS WHAT IT IS TO BE A REAL WOMAN! God bless you and your family always. BTW, my sister was diagnosed with Breast Ca in 2007 and now again she has been diagnosed. My hat is off to all of the women who have "Fought the Fight" and who are still Fighting!! Best of luck to you always.
Your lemon squeeze was a noble attempt at uniting some trashy women. You really can not fix stupid or mean. John Wayne said life is hard, its even harder when you are stupid.
YOU are a brilliant , educated and classy woman. Quad as Mariahs puppet and Tori are truly hopeless. They WANT the drama, I think they watched too much RHOA and lost sight of the fact they are in a CAST and need to be able to be in the same room together.
You are a breath of fresh air Dr.!
I could and would easily walk away after the wine had been thrown. I would have gone straight to Kari and asked security to remove Toya. Toya would have then looked like the fool she was and I would have avoided the intense embarassment my husband would feel watching me get into the gutter with Toya. It's called being an adult and a lady. There is never a need to resort to violence at a black tie event. There are always security people waiting to toss out the drunk and disorderly. Why lower yourself to the instigator's level? I love Mariah and felt sorry that Toya would discus her childs father. That being said, I would also have called Kari in advance, shared Toya's disgusting behavior and had her turned away at the door. Commenting on Dr. Jackie not understainding children was more than inappropriate it was a disgrace to all adoptive parents. It was also a slap in the face to Mariah's husband who didn't contribute sperm but who has parented and loved their child since he entered her life.
Loved your response, you hit the nail on the head.
no she is not she is mother was protecting her child instead of them sweeping what toya did under the rug maybe she would not said that bc Dr. Jackie did act like she did not understand how she was feeling abt her child