She knows how to Goop, but she just can’t stepmom. Yet. We have no doubt Gwyneth Paltrow will figure it out.
The wellness company founder wed producer Brad Falchuk in September, and became a stepmom to his two teens, Isabella and Brody, from a previous marriage. She’s already Mom to Apple and Moses from ex-husband Chris Martin.
“I’ve never been a stepmother before,” Paltrow told WSJ Magazine. “I don’t know how to do it.”
“We are still doing it in our own way,” she explained. “With teenage kids, you’ve got to tread lightly. It’s pretty intense, the teenage thing.”
Here’s a few tips for Gwyneth from a stepmom who lived to write about it:
It may take them a while to like you.
“In the children’s eyes, you are the final and most obvious symbol of their dashed hopes that their parents might someday work things out, so don’t be surprised if it takes a while for them to warm up to you,” said writer Shadra Bruce.
All the parents enforce the same rules.
“There cannot be two sets of rules — daddy rules and wicked stepmother rules — you and your spouse should communicate regularly and have a united set of family rules that everyone lives by,” Bruce noted.
It’s not a love competition.
“Do not try to compete with them — your husband loves you, but he loves them too. Don’t put your spouse in the middle of every tangle.”
If you don’t like his or her kids, call it off.
“If you cannot open your heart to his children, do not marry him.”
Be the bigger person.
“They are kids, you are the adult — they are supposed to make things difficult, and you are supposed to rise above it.”
Remember, they will always be there.
“Children need consistency to build trust. Provide it with an open heart and mind. They were there before you started dating, and they will always be a part of your life and his or hers.”
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