Recap: You are Dog Valker?

This episode was full of surprises and facing fears, but more full of surprises. Not only did Mike ask Jessica to marry him, but MJ had a surprise of her own…introducing her boyfriend, Charlie, to her mom, Vida.

Here’s the thing with Persian mothers, they don’t like to be surprised. I’d say that applies to all mothers, but Persian mothers have a whole different set of circumstances and reasons why they don’t like to be surprised, but the biggest being they have to be prepared. I’m not talking about mentally, I’m talking about physically. If a Persian mother doesn’t have her red lipstick on, there will be hell to pay. Thankfully, Vida joon came red-lipped and ready to put Charlie in the hot seat.

Before we get to Vida joon, let’s talk about some of the other surprises we experienced this episode. One being GG agreed to take a lie detector test. Now we all sometimes have to convince people of things that are hard to believe, but you have to admit people don’t just go around taking polygraph tests unless you’re in trouble with the police or Jerry Springer. But we learned that Golnesa is sick of people doubting her, so she’s putting her fate in the hands of science.

Sadly, we also learned this episode that GG has been suffering from rheumatoid arthritis. Girlfriend has a lot on her plate. But thankfully Asifa moved out to keep GG out of trouble -- she said it herself, she feels it if she gets in a fight.

Another big surprise -- Mike got engaged. Now here’s the thing, getting asked to get married at 13,000 feet in the air must be pretty emotional on its own, but jumping out of a plane while getting asked to get engaged equals a cry face to remember.

Meanwhile on the other side of town, MJ’s mom, Vida was facing her own surprise. She was going to meet what Reza would call the “Dog Valker” aka Charlie. After meeting Charlie, Vida joon did leave us with one very important piece of knowledge:

Being 6’1’’ is the average height for a man. In what country? I’m not sure, but I’ve learned to never question a Persian mother. They’re always right…in their own minds. Sadly, Reza as a Persian mother wasn’t right -- Charlie isn’t a “dog valker"…he owns pet shampoos.

This season is shaping up to be one for the books… Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to take myself on a “valk.”

Comments? Tweet me @nadinerajabi.

Nadine Rajabi is a television producer, writer, and stand-up comedian from Los Angeles. Most importantly she's Bravo’s in-house Persian.