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Stuck in Between Sarah and Jay

David reveals how torn up he was after Jay left.

By David Murray

Let's start on a light note, shall we? I finally got to share with the world my Cantonese skills at dinner in Mountain View at Fu Lam Mum! I love everything about the language, and I especially am a fan of everything Hong Kong -- it rivals Toyko as my favorite place in the east. Would you believe I still haven't been there? I'll admit that I have a secret fantasy of being Bill Murray's character from Lost in Translation, flying around various places in Asia as the token white guy on commercials. If you know anyone who can hook me up, tell them to email me at the address listed at the bottom of my website! I need the money, haha, especially considering that I've liquidated all my cash, investments, and everything else to my name so we can keep our house. And it's true, I am hella strapped for cash, enough to ask Sarah to loan me some (and get denied, oy vey)! At $10,000 a tweet, Sarah only needs to write about 40 characters to afford a $3k loan, no? It's OK; another friend of mine gave me the loan, and -- here's the kicker -- I paid it back in LESS THAN TWO WEEKS by working my ass off on my contract programming gig. I would never ask for money if I couldn't pay it back quickly. And I proved that. Now hopefully I'll never have to do that again.

Which brings us to, well, the poo hitting the fan. Hermione says it right: "Having enemies in Silicon Valley is bad for business." That's why I do my best to get along. But as each day goes by, it gets harder and harder to stand by Sarah's side while she alienates and upsets other people that matter in my life. I can definitely say it's not common Silicon Valley behavior to throw a drink in someone's face. If someone's angry at someone, they might write some passive-aggressive tweets or even a nasty blog post about shady tactics used in their business. But throwing drinks is an aggressive act -- it's using physical force with the intention of causing harm to someone, which is the dictionary definition of violence. And folks in business out here won't go far if they use violence as a tactic of self-expression, no matter how innocent it may seem.

That night was so painful and miserable. I brought my friends together, looking forward to an awesome night. And it just blew up in my face when Sarah threw that drink. I did my best to be there for her as a friend, but I really wanted to be there for my buddy Jay. As soon as I discovered Jay left, I went to a corner by myself and just cried. I cried a lot, because I felt so embarrassed and upset for him, but I felt so stuck in the middle -- and believe me, I was incredibly angry at Sarah. Normally when someone hurts a friend of mine, I do what I can to protect that friend. But what do I do when one friend hurts another? How can I be there for both of them and yet help them make amends? It's ripping me apart. Stress in business is hard enough, but this is too much.

I spent a lot of time trying to convince Sarah to apologize to Jay, and we'll see if that happens. For now, I just have to stay focused on my business... I don't have time for this kind of drama!

Keep watching Start-Ups: Silicon Valley Monday nights at 10/9c on Bravo! Also, feel free to check out my app, follow me (Facebook, Twitter), or book me for speaking engagements by emailing the address listed at the bottom of my website!

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