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"I’ve dealt with quite a bit of postpartum depression after Dean was born, and I had a hard time seeing that it was going to be better in terms of feeling more comfortable with Dean being around people and not worrying that everyone or someone was gonna hurt my child," Ashley said in a phone interview with The Daily Dish back in June. "It was the most crippling fear for me."
Dean was born last July, so it's been a journey for The Real Housewives of Potomac mom.
She continued: "It was inexplicable. I don’t even know where it came from. I’m not usually a fearful person, but for some reason I just felt like this innocent little being was so fragile and I was worried about everybody, not even on purpose, but accidentally hurting him, and it, I just wound myself up. So, I finally came out of that around six months and since then, it’s been so just fulfilling. It’s been a dream being Dean’s mom and he’s such a great kid. He doesn’t cry necessarily. I’m just so lucky. So, I’m just basking in every moment, spending as much time with him as I possibly can, and I’m really sad and it’s unfortunate about the pandemic and how that came about. The only silver lining for that for me has been that I have been spending a lot of time with my family. So, that’s been a blessing."
It took some professional help, though, for Ashley to get to that point of recognizing what she was feeling and finding a way to cope with it.
"Well, I didn’t even recognize I had postpartum. I thought I was normal. I thought every single mom feels like this and it wasn’t until I started having some really dark thoughts about myself and feeling overwhelmed. I started feeling like I wasn’t capable of protecting Dean. Very weird. Looking back on it, I’m like, gosh, I can’t believe I really felt like that, so I did have to get professional help," she said."
She reflected, "And actually my pediatrician recognized it first by giving me this questionnaire and I answered the questions and they were even eye-opening for myself to know that I wasn’t, things were not as right with me. So, I went and saw a postpartum therapist. She helped me."
RHOP airs Sundays at 9/8c. Check out Ashley and Dean in action, below.
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