Second-Guessing Myself

The First Day

Boy oh boy … what a long Day One. It’s hard to believe it was only one day; it seemed like several. First impression … overwhelmed. I feel so rushed to do anything that matters, but have all the time in the world to wait around or stand smiling … wish it was the opposite, but that’s the whole concept I guess. Not enough time, food, sleep (as of tonight), and solidarity … no talking, no socializing.

But I must say I’m very impressed with the others. Everyone is pretty cool. Merlin and his red hat/feather. He’s lucky I didn’t King Fu chop it in half with my razor sharp hand. Some people are familiar, but I don’t know anyone. A lot of talent that I’m happy to work with or against, depending on the challenge of course.

I hope I feel inspired in the morning. I’m nervous about the challenge. I’m not as technically trained as others, which slows me down and time…really giving me anxiety. But I’m happy, and happy with whatever happens. Hope for all the inspiration and success constructing my look tomorrow!

Oh Yaaaaaa. Boom. & Kaboom.

The First Elimination

I just worked the longest day … up at 5 a.m. and back to my Fisher-Price “my first bunk bed” at about 1 a.m. My fingertips are sooo sore. I have been working as fast as I can, really focused. The hardest thing so far is time! Not enough time to really explore options, creativity, fabrics, pattern perfection etc. I only have enough fabric to do one top and the “must-have” pencil/tube skirt.

I’m going forward with a simple halter blouse, but will drape and gather very elegantly. The charcoal silk I chose is beautiful fabric. I also think many other designers are missing the mark on the challenge. The design is supposed to be wearable, not a genie outfit, or some avant-garde design that will only look interesting on the runway and sellable! Plus I want to bring my men’s design influence in with this piece. The vertical gathering is reminiscent of a tux shirt and the horizontal waist gather are like a cummerbund.

Our group is cool other than Kristin calling us out in front of Isaac and Kelly today. I think we are working together well. We have all really thought through our strategy both individually and as a team. I really wanted to get it done today, but the sewing machine was occupied the last hour … so I’m going to have to really hurry in the morning to get done. After Isaac and Kelly came through and bagged on everyone’s design, I realized I had to change my pattern to make it bigger. Plus I only had a very very short fitting with my model Sara. Although she seems similar to her card, she definitely is busty. I’m worried about her bust size and how soft her waist line is. If my look doesn’t have an hourglass silhouette it will look horribly sloppy. I’m going to have to squeeze her midsection tight. But our skirt is definitely tight.

I’m regretting not measuring her bare bust today. I measured it with her bra on, and it matches my garment but I really don’t know how much her bust will drop when the bra is off. The cameras were pointed right at her so to be a gentleman I didn’t remove the bra. I need to stop second-guessing myself.

I’m so exhausted. Anyways tomorrow is elimination and I’m nervous. I’m pretty sensitive and don’t look forward to ridicule. Trying to be positive. After all, what’s the worst that can happen? I have a great business, Elmer Ave, and life I love already at home. I think many of my competition don’t.