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Ask the Matchmakers: Get Over Yourself

Our matchmakers think you need to act your age and not be judgmental.


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I'm 21 and have never had a boyfriend. Ever. I'm not a social butterfly, and I'm not into the club/bar scene. I'm already seeing characteristics of a work-a-holic in myself, but I don't want to miss the chance at love. I'm extremely tired of guys my age because they tend to be immature. This obviously makes me attracted to older guys, yet the older guys feel I'm too young. What can I do here? -confuzzled

Excuses, excuses, excuses ... Knock it off. I have no sympathy for you at all. Time for tough love. First of all you're 21, you're still a kid, you have your whole life ahead of you. Sure you may have book smarts and feel mature, but you have no wisdom –- wisdom comes with age. So this whole "my life is flashing before eyes" whine that is the undertone of your question, get over it. Secondly, you sound like a homebody. You don't go out, you spend too much time working ... how are you ever going to meet someone? Are you overweight? Too skinny? Bad hair? Bad complexion?  Poor self esteem? Something is holding you back. And what about high school or college? Overprotective  parents? Bookish? Afraid? Well .. KNOCK IT OFF! You are woman! You are the most powerful creature in the world! Clean yourself up, go shopping, and get an attitude change. Pay for a makeover, pay for a photoshoot, feel sexy, get a matchmaker! Online dating! Something! Just stop whining! Oh, and the whole "men my own age are immature?" Aren't you doing to them what the older guys are doing to you? Judging them based on age? Stop it. Go out, date, have fun, you don't even sound ready for a boyfriend yet anyway. You need practice! Life is too short and you need to have some fun. -Destin


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