Pickle Packed Days, Kandi Koated Nights

Pickle Packed Days, Kandi Koated Nights

Bravotv.com's Assistant Editor selects the top three moments of Episode 5.


I hope you've all sufficiently recovered from your post-Halloween hangovers. If not, let The Boo! Squad (I couldn't resist, sorry!) help nurse you back to health. 

The editors here at Bravotv.com take Halloween very seriously, as evidenced by our sweet "Just Desserts" judges costumes. Let me tell you, it was no easy task to mold my wig into a pompadour! It took a few hours, some trimming, and copious amounts of Dep gel to get it just right. So besides getting a great picture, I have a much better understanding of wigs. No wonder Kim has so many! Wig upkeep and maintenance is no laughing matter. 

But anyway, on to our #3 moment this week: NeNe and Cynthia's lingerie outing. I think NeNe should think about becoming a dictionary editor, because her definitions are so catchy:

Hooker Boobs (noun) – Real high, nipples to the sky.

How much easier would it be to remember SAT vocab words as defined by NeNe Leakes? Granted "hooker boobs" is unlikely to be used in the analogy or reading comprehension sections, but I'm fairly certain she could come up with something great for "defenestrate" or "bumptious." 

Sheree's date scored the #2 spot, mostly because Sheree's facial expressions were priceless. Exhibit A:


I have to say, I was with Sheree on this one, "Who does that? Make me eat cookie dough off his hands…" I think everyone cringed as he chased her around with his cookie dough laden finger. Call me old fashioned, but eating dough off any part of someone else's body seems a bit presumptuous for a third date. But hats off to Sheree for being a trooper (and for her declaration that she's "not doing bellies anymore")!  

And now for the #1 moment: Phaedra and the pickles. Perhaps it was the shape and size of them? Maybe it was the stark contrast between the green of the pickle and her pink lipstick? Possibly it was just the way she went at those pickles with such zeal? For whatever reason, what sounded like a cute idea for a pregnancy shoot took an oddly sexual turn and rather uncomfortable turn.

First off, did anyone else catch that the photographer's name was Spark St. Jude? When did we step into a Gossip Girl novel? Because that sounds like the perfect name for either the van der Woodsen family photographer who is secretly trying to sully their name or Blair's newest rival. All the wink wink nudge nudge laughter between Phaedra and Spark (again, seriously, Spark?), the comment about sucking rather than biting, and then when Apollo and Phaedra go at the same pickle from different ends … it was a lot to process. While the finished product was cute, I couldn't help but wonder, "Would the photo shoot have been more or less awkward if ice cream had been included?" I suppose we'll never know. 

Now sit back, pop open a fresh jar of pickles, and enjoy this week's clip:


PS: Snooki (aka Princess Pickle) approved this moment. 


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