A VanderFabulous Affair

Hello Beverly Hills fans. It’s been a season of mammoth proportions and so we’re ending it as all epic stories end -- with a wedding heralding new beginnings. I recommend you get some tissues on hand and have your tiny dog tuxedo ready as we walk down the aisle of the finale episode together.

A VanderFabulous Affair
As soon as Jason stood up this season and said he had an announcement to make, I got excited. Let's all be honest here -- this wedding is exactly the sort of event that's in Lisa Vanderpump-Todd's wheelhouse, and we’ve all been waiting to see with baited breath to see exactly how incredible it was going to be. And here we are. The Vanderfabulous wedding is of course taking place on Giggy's favorite place -- the tennis court. But it's not like guests are seated on side of the net in anevent reminiscent of Billy Jean King. The space has been transformed with a palatial tent, copious flowers, crystals, bling, etc. The only remnant of the game is the pole used to hang the net, which Lisa thinks will be perfect for Camille's grinding. I agree. Please leave that intact so Ms. Donatacci can get to it (speaking of things in people’s wheelhouse).

Friend or Enema?
Meanwhile, Paul is getting ready for the wedding in his own way -- by having a colonoscopy. This means he needed to first free his body of, er, toxins. And so he asked his darling wife for a bit of assistance. . .

Did anyone actually think that Adrienne was going to go through with that one? When Paul called for Ms. Maloof, did anyone think she would head in there and say "Oh of course, just bend over." No. If any of us have learned anything about the Bickersons, we would have bet $100 bucks that there was no humanly possible way Adrienne was about to give Paul an enema. And I see her point: that's personal maintenance that's firmly in the DIY column.

Thankfully all with Paul's colon was fine and the only complication was a bit of air. As Paul mumbled through recovery, he had a bit of the "toots," just of air, but still vaguely sound a bit like something else. And it stressed him out! Don’t feel bad Paul. I stress exactly that much whenever I have to pass a little gas myself.

Also, I'd be remiss not to mention -- did anyone else notice that Paul’s nurse Kristina looked almost exactly like fellow Bravoleb Rosie Pope? I was wondering if she was moonlighting with adults now.

Simply Divine
And then it’s go time. Kevin Lee, the man himself, finally arrives in all his blouse-wearing glory. Lisa attempts to get the bridesmaids dressed (Thanks to triplet makeup artists. Note to other multiple birth folks: this is a possible career path). Max even shaves his “ferret” mohawk at Lisa’s request. And Ken writes his speech -- even without Lisa’s help.

I’m going to throw a number out at you -- three. This is the number of times I cried (not sobbing just gentle guffaws and tears). First, I got misty when Lisa got choked up about Ken walking Pandora down the aisle. Then when Ken pushed it a bit farther when he told the priest that the was going to share Pandora. And finally when Ken made his speech, I did that smile and cry that’s a speciality of wedding guests the world over. It's amazing to see a family that so obviously cares deeply for each other. Let’s just relish in the joining of these kids for a moment.

I did not cry when I saw Adrienne and Paul dancing, but I did chortle heartily. So I guess that makes my number 3.5. Please leave the number of times you got verklempt int he comments.

They Are Family
The ladies get together for a little drinks and nosh at Kyle's house. Kim sadly skips, which obviously breaks Kyle's heart (and mine). The women discuss Camille's "extremely rewarding" (yes, that kind of rewarding) relationship with her Greek God and how it's impossible for adults to have certain body types.

This was one of the first times the gals had gathered after Russell's passing, and it was touching to see everyone coming together and supporting Taylor in the difficult time. Just like Taylor said of Kennedy’s progress, every day is a little bit better. Plus it doesn't hurt when you have great friends to help you along the way.

And that’s it! We've got loads of reunion goodness coming for you next. Thanks for reading my recaps this season and commenting. I wish I could give you all a sparkler and have a processional for us fans Vanderpump-style, but unfortunately that kind of internet pyrotechnics has not been developed.