The Adrienne and Brandi Show

BRAVO to the Baltimore Ravens on their thrilling Superbowl victory!!! One for the ages I'm told and I didn't watch a single play.

Now on to far more important matters...

One of the great aspects about the Housewives' experience is the opportunity to examine my behavior when the show airs. Some audiences are surprised that I have been very quiet on the show, but I must remind them that I was brought in by Kyle and didn't know any of the other women. Most of the women's conversations continued (ad nauseam) to revolve around drama that occurred well before I came into the picture and did not involve me, so I chose not to insert myself unnecessarily. It was actually awkward at times as I sat there speechless thinking "Really? We're going to dredge up this again?" I recall trying to change the subject on occasion, but those attempts fell on deaf ears. I'll give them this much...these women are committed to their drama.

Pole dancing can be great exercise, an art form, or a way to line your pocket with mostly one dollar bills in front of guys I definitely wouldn't want to bring home...none of which particularly excites me.

Don't get me wrong, any woman who benefits from spinning around upside down with her legs in the air should by all means stick with it...The opportunities could be endless. I tried hiding and avoiding taking a turn on the pole, but when Brandi called my name I decided to give it the old college try...and since I never went to college, the results were as expected. I'm glad the other girls were able to have some fun though.

Riding back to the hotel, Kim shared her interest in a "nose job," which Yolanda thought was a mistake. Although Yolanda's intentions likely came from a good place, she hardly knows Kim and what may or may not be best for her. At the end of the day, we need to make our own choices in life and learn and grow from them. I think Kim is very happy with her decision...good for her.

I was hungry at this point and envisioning an evening of fabulous food, fine wine, and stimulating conversation. Everyone appeared in good spirits, so I thought we may finally enjoy a dinner without a fight breaking out. How naive of me to think it was possible to have a civilized dinner with these women, right? It must be an unwritten rule that something distasteful must go down at every meal. Perhaps this is how the girls stay so thin...they never end up eating and chew each other out instead.

Fortunately, I spilled red wine on my dress, which was enough to shift the energy temporarily. Most of the women were helpful and that was very sweet, but Yolanda just gave me a disapproving stare. Not sure where that came from. All I could think was "Thank God I didn't spill that red wine at Yolanda's house because if it upset her in Vegas, I would really be up s--- creek in Malibu."

Maybe Yolanda has never spilled a drink before, which wouldn't surprise me since her life is so pristine and perfect that it just wouldn't fit in with her image. That said, I am admittedly clumsy and this won't be the last time I spill a drink. As for the stain, I remembered my mother-in-law once told me advice Barbra Streisand gave her, white wine can be used to remove red wine stains. Thank you Babs, it worked!

After a break in the action, we're back for yet another encore performance of the Adrienne and Brandi saga that we just can't seem to get enough of. A quick blow-by-blow recap: Kyle sticks up for Adrienne in absentia, Camille walks away because she's afraid she may say something she may regret....Not to worry, Kyle convinces her to return and you guessed it, Camille says something she may regret and asserts Lisa does not own SUR which leads Brandi to announce that Adrienne may not have said stake in The Palms and Yolanda points out the obvious that we have spent three dinners talking about Adrienne and Brandi's drama.

Well, I haven't been talking about it, but I've been forced to listen to it and can't help but thinking where's Dean to ask "Who's ready for dessert?" The melee subsides, but not before Yolanda deduces that Kyle loves the drama. I'll let you be the judge of that since it's none of my business, and I'm not going to speak up just to hear the sound of my own voice.

Thank you for indulging in my blog.

Until next week...

xx,
Marisa