Kyle: Nobody Bothered to Support Me
Kyle shares how she was felt going into Cirque school and why she didn't speak out against the Brandi "bully" story.
This week Mauricio and I have dinner with Joyce and Michael. We really like them both and have fun together. Michael and Mauricio are both golf fanatics so they instantly had that in common.
Hearing "news" about my family on TV or on the Internet is not new to me. Often, I will see or hear things and have to call my family and say "What is going on? is this true!?!" Most of the time I know right away that it's another BS story.
However, this is the first time I have been in this position personally. I too have been guilty at times of thinking that there had to be some sort of truth behind these stories. I think it was reading about Jennifer Aniston that made me realize that a lot of these stories are literally invented. How many times have we read about and even SEEN pictures of Jennifer Aniston's "baby bump"? She has to be on her 14th child by now!
When I walked into the circus school, the last thing I wanted to do was be around most of the women to be honest. I was still upset from lunch at Carlton's, and did not feel like "bonding" with them. But my sister made this plan, and she had good intentions. I was happy when I saw Kim, Joyce, and actually Carlton, too. I was still completely unaware that Carlton disliked me so much -- and she was being pretty nice to my face.
When we first sat down, Kim was explaining why she invited everyone and why it was important to her. From the minute I walked in, I could feel the negative energy coming from the other sofa. So when Yolanda cut Kim off and was basically saying "Enough already. Let's get stared," I felt defensive. I felt like she was being disrespectful, considering Kim invited everyone and was excited to share this day.
We all moved on from that, but there was a very strange vibe in the room. Kim had pulled me aside and told me that Brandi thought I had called her a bully. UGH. WHY am I all of a sudden on the defensive when I hadn't done anything?!? Beyond frustrating. Here I didn't even want to be there to begin with because of the way the women acted at Carlton's, and now Brandi is pissed off at ME? I decided to go up and say something because it was either that or leave. I didn't want to do that to Kim since she had been talking about this day for a while.
After the lunch at Carlton's that you saw last week, a story came out on the Internet. SOMEONE leaked what happened that day and talked about what Brandi, Yolanda, and Lisa had said and how upset I was. Most of the information was incorrect, as usual, but they were right about me being upset. The word bully was never mentioned in the article but that was the paparazzi's (that Brandi ran into) interpretation of it.
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Later things got more awkward when we all went for lunch after. The bully comment came up again. Again, I am having defend myself against something I didn't do. There clearly is not a lot of trust right now on ANYONE'S part.
Brandi and Lisa were clearly upset about the article and I was as well! The LAST thing I wanted to do was draw MORE attention to the lies in the tabloids, which is EXACTLY why I was so upset after leaving Carlton's lunch.
When Lisa suggested I tweet something in defense of them I really was shocked. When the tabloids first came out Mauricio and I hired a lawyer to sue. We soon learned that it was not that simple. We were also advised to not give it any attention. That is what the magazines want.
It was extremely frustrating because we WANTED to come out and say something! So when Lisa was upset that I hadn't made a "statement" or tweeted in defense of their behavior at Carlton's lunch, all I could think was "Are you kidding me?!?" I haven't even come out and defended the lies about my own family, but they wanted me to defend their bringing up the tabloids at Carlton's?
A few months before Carlton's lunch, Brandi had warned me this particular "magazine" was going to go after us. Once the lies were printed I didn't hear from any of the girls. The first time was when Lisa mentioned it was at my house when Mauricio and Portia were in the kitchen. The second time was at Carlton's.
After the story came out about Lisa, Brandi, and Yolanda at Carlton's lunch, Lisa went on a red carpet and made a comment saying she didn't believe any of the lies and they were BS. If that comment had stood on it's own, I would have been so grateful and happy to have that kind of support. Unfortunately, it came only AFTER the women had brought it up and the story had grown. It also wasn't lost on me that nobody bothered to say that BEFORE their character had been attacked and that they had in fact contributed to the story growing.
So much happens this season and so many of the relationships change between the women. It is very hard to watch at times. Some things I wish I had seen more clearly at the time, other things I wish I hadn't. Ignorance, really can be bliss at times. . .
