I am sorry that it’s taken me quite a while to write this blog. I've been traveling a lot as many of you may have noticed in some pictures I've posted on Twitter, and I’ve been to other places that I haven't posted pictures of yet. This 2013 has started wonderfully, with many exciting projects and endeavors that I hope to be able to fill you all in on soon. By now, most of you have seen all the episodes including the reunion and the lost footage. I'm sure, as I have been told by many people, that your mind was made up about how you felt about me or some of the other ladies, and as the season progressed or even as late as the reunion, many of you changed your mind and saw us in a different light. Some of us more positive, and, well, others in a not so positive light. I am a firm believer that in time everyone shows their true colors.
This has been an amazing season. I have met some amazing people. From each and every one of these ladies I try to pull out the positive aspects that I have received from them. I truly need to thank each and every one of them, because it's not only through the beautiful and kind friendships that I have grown, but also through the women that tried to bring me down at all cost. So to all of you I say thank you. It’s because of them that I have become a more confident and stronger woman. Sometimes we look back at negative circumstances in our life and people that have not treated us kindly (to say the least) without justification or reason, and we end up suffering from their actions and cruelty. I have chosen to stand taller and stronger and turn the negative into a positive. When people will fabricate anything about you and pick fights with you for no reason, it must mean that you are doing something right. I spent all season smiling, laughing, and loving, because that is the person that I am. That is my blueprint. Do I have sad and frustrating moments? Of course. But I choose to always see the glass as half full and always focus on the solution, not the problem. Did I get hurt? Sure I did. I never imagined that some women had grown up in age but not spiritually. There is a great saying: What people do to you is their karma, how you react is yours. This has never been so true as it is right now for me. I have also learned that although all my life I have been a people pleaser, right now I first need to think of pleasing myself. People will love or hate or judge you whether you're a celebrity, public figure, or a hardworking person that is not recognized in the media. They will draw conclusions about you based on what they know, or even if they have never met you, or whatever they want to believe. I can't control people’s feelings and try to have everyone love me. I live my life without trying to do any harm to anyone. I give of myself to the people I care about and also through my foundation, Sharing Smiles. I was reminded also that not even God or Jesus Christ was loved by all. Even him, without any sin, was wrongly accused and hated by many. So who am I to think that I can have everyone love me, defects and all? I guess it was naive, yet eternally optimistic on my part. I still choose to not let the negative circumstances that have played out this season change the person that I am. To harden my heart and not continue to be the happy, free spirited, loving person that I am would mean allowing those that want to hurt me win. I will never allow that.
I thank Joanna and Lisa in particular for being amazing friends to me from day one. I built a bond with them that won't be easily broken. I believe that loyalty and true friendship was demonstrated both ways. For that, I am eternally grateful. Lea was a tricky one. At first her personality and humor did not sit well with me. But in time I realized that if you peel off the layer of her humor and sometimes not so funny jokes, you will find a woman that is a true friend and also very loyal. If people take the time to truly get to know her, I think you will all agree. We all have different personalities, and it’s just about figuring out which ones you can live with, and also who will contribute something positive to your life. Surround yourself with people you admire and that have a shining light and positive energy. I have been very blessed to have a nucleus of friends that are just that. I have made a conscious choice and effort many years ago to no longer surround myself with people who are constantly negative and whose objective in life is to tear others apart by their words or actions. I celebrate my friends’ successes and wish and hope that each and every one of you are able to achieve all your goals and dreams.
Thank you for all your kind words that I have received on Twitter and Facebook. I try to answer as many of you as I can, and I am humbled by all your beautiful comments.
To all these ladies, I wish them happiness, love, and light.
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Thanking Joanna and Lisa