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Let me begin by saying that I could have watched Elsa try and mircowave things for a full hour. Forget Bimini, let's just turn Marysol and Elsa's Grey Gardens-esque activities into a show.
Seriously though, what was happening at Casa Patton? According to Marysol, part of her beauty routine is to make it freezing cold in her home before going to bed. Is this a proven method? Something tells me not.
Poor Elsa was rolled up in roughly 37 blankets on Marysol's bed, because I guess they had a sleepover (maybe a psychic reading session went long?). Clearly Elsa was never meant to go any further north than Florida, because she didn't take kindly to the cold.
In an effort to restore some warmth to her witchy body, Elsa microwaved some mugs of coffee for her and Marysol. For 12 seconds. This of course led to her shock that the coffee was not warm. Where's that Havana Elsa truck when you need it? But really can you blame her? I can barely put together a coherent sentence in the morning before I've had my caffeine fix.
Prediction: I can only hope this leads to Elsa and Marysol being sent on a camping trip in the wilderness.How long exactly was this Bimini trip? I was under the impression it was maybe a long weekend, but the amount of luggage Adriana showed up with suggests it was more like a month-long affair. And honestly you know it's bad when OTHER HOUSEWIVES are giving you a hard time for how much you brought. That means you've crossed into Imelda Marcos territory.
But among the myriad hat boxes, suitcases, and other Housewives sundries, there was somehow no sign of Adriana's passport. Don't you begin packing by finding your passport? It's the one thing you know you must have. You may forget to bring any underwear, but the passport you have. Evidently not the case for Adriana. So she hightails it back home missing the flight in the private plane. Ouch! She must have been kicking herself later while wedged between people in coach. But hey, at least she didn't have to check any bags!
Prediction: You know that Adriana's son totally just hid her passport for kicks when he say how much stuff she was bringing.
Finally the ladies all make it and get settled in Bimini (which is in the Bahamas in case you were wondering). But Alexia's been holding onto a little secret -- an article saying that Karent's boyfriend has started dating another woman.
Huh? That's kind of awkward when you consider that she's on TV with her Rodolfo as her boyfriend! So what exactly is happening there? Unclear.So of course the ladies then spend the entire rest of the evening and dinner dancing around the topic, which is super awkward. Finally after many subcommittees met outside behind a see-through glass door, everyone ended up outside FINALLY forcing Alexia to tell Karent. At this point it was way more awkward then it would have been had she mentioned it earlier in the day, making it the slowest train wreck I've ever witnessed.
Prediction: A subsequent article is released proclaiming that Rodolfo is not really Rodolfo -- his evil twin Antonio has just been masquerading as him the whole time!