The Glimmer of Love

As I sit back and watch this episode, I can't help but get caught up in the beauty of autumn. All of the rich and bountiful colors of New Jersey's harvest season, simply gorgeous. 

It was really fun to watch everyone gather together at the Laurita's to carve pumpkins. The kids really seemed to be having a great time, and Jacqueline was certainly in her comfort zone surrounded by the large gathering of family and friends. 

Seeing all the kids in their costumes brought back great memories for me. I sure do miss the days when Rich and I would gather together with our neighbors and all of our children and make our way through the neighborhood. Halloween is so much fun for everyone. Victoria and Joseph went off to a church youth group party with their friends, so I'm glad Rich and I decided to have some fun as well. That evening sure did have a few surprises! How hysterical was Joey working his gold, leopard dress!  

After the Gorga christening, Rich and I invited Melissa and Joey to come over and talk without the kids around. As you may have noticed, when things got out of hand at the christening, we tried to remain as calm as possible. Getting all of the children out of the room was our initial concern realizing that any more involvement would just make matters worse. Rich and I immediately gathered our kids, my mother, and sister and decided to leave. We felt so bad for Melissa and Joey. They were distraught, and we wanted to be there for them. We have known for years that there were issues that stood in the way of the Gorgas and the Guidices having a healthy relationship. As we all know, families are very complex. Their history and emotions have many layers. The outburst at the christening certainly did not occur from just a simple "congratulations."

As I said at the dinner table, "Sometimes things have to get to be the worst before they can get better." This was it. Rich and I wanted to try and help, even if it was small steps toward a resolution, we had to try. We thought the best way was to encourage both Joey and Teresa to meet and discuss what was bothering them. For Rich and I it has always been best to talk face to face. We've always felt that when you look into the eyes of your estranged loved one, you can see past the anger to the glimmer of love that will always shine through. Because with families it's not always bad, there's always so much more good. With that thought I had made up my mind that if the opportunity presented itself, I would try to speak to Teresa. I normally would not involve myself, but in this case, I witnessed their fight and the backlash. Things had gone too far.

The Posche fashion show was great fun and the evening was a complete success. Jacqueline, Melissa, and Teresa did a great job on the catwalk as well as all the other models. There was a great energy when it was over, and I went into the room where all the models and stylists were gathered. I decided to congratulate Teresa on a job well done and complimented her on how nice she looked. Having said that, I asked her if we could have a moment to talk somewhere a little quieter. I walked her into an empty room away from the crowd. I wanted her to feel comfortable and know that I was not looking to cause any embarrassment. I started our conversation by trying to encourage her to talk to her brother or to Melissa. Immediately she went into defense mode and told me she knew her brother and I didn't. In hindsight, I should have just turned and walked away. I was embarrassed and hurt. I was not approaching her from a place of disrespect or accusation. I didn't want to initiate a battle with Teresa, that was never my intention. I simply wanted to try and bring the two sides together.

When Teresa could not think of an intelligent response, what does she do? Hmm, she then decides to attack me for leaving the christening. Does anyone else see a pattern here? Why is it that whenever Teresa is confronted, she flips the table? Come on, you've all been watching.

I told her I was concerned for not only my children, but all of the other children as well. That's when I mentioned that I saw Gia and tried to comfort her, and that I wheeled Audriana and some other little ones out of the commotion. As far as my kids are concerned, they are both in high school. Fights break out now and then, I've always taught my kids when they are witness to a fight or altercation, they should not be bystanders. If things are out of control, get out and get help. As parents we must lead by example.

Make no mistake, the comments I made about my concern for her children were not meant to be an insult to her parenting abilities. It is very clear to anyone who has ever witnessed Teresa with her girls, that she is a loving and caring mother. Teresa is absolutely obsessed with her girls, and they adore her. Furthermore, it is not in my nature to attack anyone for their parenting. As parents we learn as we go along, and we all do the very best that we can. Every family is different, and we all have to do what works best. 

Teresa then lost all rational thinking and started screaming and carrying on. Here we go, my well intended conversation between cousins in a private room was turned into a spectacle involving her mother and mother-in-law. Please note, these women have known me for my most of my life. I have always had nothing but love and respect for them. I was in shock and completely humiliated! How could she do this? I was not attacking her, I was merely trying to do something good. You're welcome!

Enough drama for one night. This blog was exhausting.

On a lighter note, things are warming up here in Jersey! Beaches are officially open! I hope everyone has some great plans for Memorial Day weekend. Please take a moment to remember the brave men and women who have given their lives in military service for our great nation.   

See you next week!

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Lots of love,

Kathy