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Very Convenient

Melissa Gorga thinks Teresa was involved in Kim D's plot.

By Melissa Gorga

Well the time has come. Only one episode left -- buckle up, bitches!
There is going to be a lot of information thrown at you in the season finale, but first let me just say for the record, I was never a “stripper or a call girl or a whore or a lesbian or a drug user” as my sister-in-law likes put out there for everyone. If I was a stripper, I would say I was. I have nothing against them, and I am definitely way too smart to deny it. I would have to be a fool to think I could get away with stripping and go on a reality TV show and no one would ever find out. Come on, you have to give me more credit than that.
Now on to the Sunday’s episode. I wish I could have been a fly on the wall when those two "masterminds" were putting this together. Are we really supposed to believe that this is just all one big coincidence?
Looking back, when Kim D. called I knew it was not genuine at all. You know she needs her fashion show to get filmed so she and the store can stay relevant. I've always been good to her and supported her. I tried to shop at her store when I could, and I walked in her show last year when she asked me to. I'm not the type of person to start with someone or argue with someone unless you really provoke me.

Making Joe Look Bad
I was upset because Kim D. had been talking about a lawsuit my husband was in, trying to make him look bad. You can see how frustrating it would be for me that this woman I supported would try and make him look bad. But I got over it, and we had moved on.  Honestly there was a part of me who said, Kim likes me, she’s always nice (to my face), maybe she just wants to call a truce. I'm a sucker for an apology, always was. Even Joe could be 100% wrong in an argument we might have, and I think to myself I'm not going to talk to him for two days, I'll teach him! LOL! The second he walks up to me and gives me a kiss, I start laughing. I don't' know why I'm like that. Ugh, it's to a fault!
OK, so let’s talk about a few things that are odd in this episode.
First, I find it hard to believe that Teresa just so happened to go to a random hair salon to get her hair and makeup done before going to the Posche Fashion Show. We all see her get her hair done at home each week, and trust me, she does not like to try out new people when she knows she will be filmed and photographed.

How to Watch

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Second, the salon has a creepy PR manager that greets them and hands out champagne to their "housewife customers" and just so happened to work as a manager at a gentleman's club. Interesting career move. I wonder how one goes from gentleman's club manager to a public relations professional? I guess he wasn’t that good at his job, because the salon is now closed.

Back to the episode. Wow, this is getting better and better. So now the creepy PR manger decides to tell Teresa I used to dance for him. Oh, and that my customers miss me so much. Really? Tell them to go buy On Display or I Just Wanna on iTunes if they want a piece of me. Muah! What I love most about this scene is Teresa looks like she has stood in front of a mirror and practiced what face she was going to make for the last two weeks. For a second she actually looks confused, I think she forgot which face she was going to use, then in typical Teresa ah ha fashion she remembered and went with it. Pretty good, pretty good. But your family knows you all too well, sister. Then it cuts to a one-on-one of Teresa saying, "I heard rumors that Melissa was a dancer and now this just confirms it." Way to give me the benefit of the doubt. Looks like she is just going with this one. This is all just so convenient now isn't it?
Back to the salon, Kim looks like a pig in sh-- and Teresa takes the chance to say, "Please don't ever talk about my family." I guess only she and her husband can call me a gold-digging, raccoon-faced, lip-synching, fame whore, leave-my-husband-for-a-richer-man kind of girl. But not the creepy, fake PR guy. OH NO!

Salacious Rumors of Melissa's Past
Watching the episode at this point I'm now chuckling. Are they serious? This is the worst acting I have ever seen. All of them need to stay on reality TV forever!
And then the previews for next week’s season finale: bad weaves, more bad acting, creepy men are back, Joe Giudice’s long lost brother makes an appearance (why the hell is he there?), Kim D. lets us all know "she rolls with the big boys," oh and lots and lots of hearts pounding.
Buckle Up Bitches

In all seriousness, it's kind of sad that I went to the fashion show with every intention of having a good time. I was feeling really genuine about my relationship with Teresa, and I never in a million years thought I was going to get ambushed the way I did. I was completely taken off guard. This is just mean. There is so much more I want to say, but I have to wait until next week’s episode airs, so I’ll leave you with this... It's truly sad the lengths one woman will go to promote her store and another would go to stay on top. I just wish everyone would remember I have three kids at home and this situation was just disgusting.
See you next week.

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