I'm Real

Hello folks!

The drama continues in Morocco. It still appears to be cut as LuAnn's trip, when we were co-hosting. More to come. . .

After flying overnight from New York to Casablanca, and then flying to Marrakech, then a van ride, and then arriving at lunchtime, Ramona and I powered through the day without sleep starting with our fabulous lunch at La Mamounia by the pool, then back to the house to do fittings with the designer, cocktails with the designer after he hung up his measuring tape while the brunettes dressed, and then Brad's party that we had just been invited to! But we are troopers and we are up for anything!

Especially on the first day of vacation Ramona and I tend to burn off the extra energy after being cooped up on a plane all night. Point is we had a ball, but it was a long day. This tends to happen when you travel with a large group.

I was blindsided when the fortuneteller said other women had eyes for Mario. Not because I don't know this -- he is an attractive man in an enviable marriage, but because it brought back painful memories of my own separation, and it made me emotional. I don't want any woman to go through that. I had an amazing marriage and family life, was full of confidence, yet one has no control over others. You can have the best husband in the world, yet outside influences and circumstances can tip the scales.

I also have my doubts about where this fortuneteller came from. It may have been a hoax.

LuAnn and I were co-hosting this trip together, and I had planned a lot of activities. That first morning after the never-ending day into night we wanted to finally regroup and discuss. Therefore LuAnn wanted to sit next to me on the way to the souk. Why does Cindy get in the van and insist on sitting next to me after she said she was upset with me the night before? It's clearly bogus, just as the supposed abuse that she said she got from me in the van with Ramona the night before. That clearly never happened. I am not aggressive and it would be totally out of character for me. I think this clearly tells you that no one took Cindy's hangers either! The fun banter in the van was meant to break the ice between her and Ramona. That was my intention, just as my invite to tea was to try and help Ramona and Cindy.

Mustafa was an incredible guide and friend. He warned us to stay together and that there would be men attempting to split our party up on different tours. That had me a little more shaky, on top of Cindy going off on me in public. I also had stomach problems because I ate the fruits! Whoops!

Poor Kelly thinks that Cindy's feelings have been hurt. Cindy brings this on herself for attention. I feel bad because she has two young children without a man. It's hard.

After the Cindy scene at the souk with I was too shaken up to ride the camels, besides I had just fallen off a horse with Kelly and still had a bruise to heal. If I had ridden the camel, you can be sure I would have had the bucking one. It was bucking before and after LuAnn got on! BTW. Where do they find these camels?

I don't know where Kelly gets her information from but "when you assume, you make an ass out of u and me." Kelly hasn't had a breakdown -- she has had a breakthrough, and I think it's going to be messy for a while. But I have been there for her, and she will see I will be there for her if she wants to be a real friend.

I am not trying to keep up with the lifestyle that I had with my husband -- that's impossible. I am just trying to keep my daughter in her childhood home (that's always been mine) and fight to get my cash out of the marital homes that I invested in. Hence no settlement, but I still pay for homes I own while they are tied up with the divorce. This is not news to a lot of divorcing wives out there.

To set the record straight for those who want to put me in a neat little box, I have worked my way through college, bought my first car, invested in real estate, the financial markets, and consulted nationwide for luxury brands, restaurants, and I put millions of my own dollars into Sonja Productions LLC, produced an award-winning film with an Oscar winning star, and I don't count my friend's money or homes. My friends and I enjoy each other's company and we share what we have. I also accept them the way they are, so they don't need teeth to have lunch with me, and I can also be myself.

Cindy bringing up the pecking order again at the souk is again a old dispute. She knows very well that I meant that if Ramona thought enough of her to bring her into the group with loving arms, that she should respect that. Ramona rallied everyone together for Cindy only to be hurt, and I wasn't sure Cindy got that. I was also protecting my potential friendship with Cindy by having her over for tea and discussing these issues upfront, so she would know where I stood.

I feel bad that Jill and Ramona have reached a boiling point. I know they will always be friends, though. Jill is still angry about her loss of Bethenny, and Ramona is feeling disrespected. Jill just wants to be Mama and it's hard for her to say sorry. I know the feeling.

I, once again, pull Cindy aside to say if we have differences, let's please keep them between us, and keep it real. I need real. I'm dealing with enough in my own busy world.

Thank you for watching the reality "soap" and for jumping in the washer with us!

On another note, hopefully you caught me on WWHL for Andy's birthday party with the amazing talent Sandra Bernhard. I was exhausted from planting flower boxes, dealing with  my backyard, giving the MTA a tour of the house for the new subway repairs, and working with the HVACC man and electrician all day, but I wouldn't miss Andy's birthday for the world. I was flattered to be invited.

I posted some toaster oven recipes and some floral arrangements on my website blog. My 2011 Reel on is on YouTube and join my fanpage for updates (I need some followers!) and my follow me on Twitter for everyday thoughts with viewers, friends.