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I hope you are enjoying the season so far and that you are enjoying your summer. It’s back to school time for those of you that have young children which brings back so many great memories with Mike and Briana.
It was so much fun watching Troy and Owen this week. They are growing up so fast and are the loves of my life. It’s so great when Briana, Michael, Troy, and Owen come over to the house. There is nothing more gratifying and happy than having my family around me. The boys are so darling and make me realize what is really important in my life. It’s all about my family because they give me a purpose and bring me so much joy!!
Watching Tamra talk with her mom about her lacking in communication skills is exactly what I have experienced with her as well. Tamra blaming everyone else and not taking accountability for her own actions is typical. I’m so tired of Tamra constantly talking about how “I ATTACKED HER MARRIAGE”, because she knows it is the farthest thing from the truth. She is focused on this to attempt to get others to be on her side and to take the focus off of her own issues. The fact is the fact. I didn’t attack her marriage – I want her happy. But the truth is, I don’t want to continue to talk about it publically or privately because I don’t care one way or another. Tamra is the one who keeps bringing it up, not me. I don’t care about it – it’s dead to me.
It’s sad to me that Tamra’s relationship with her daughter ended four months after her marriage to Eddie. I did not know this until now and the fact that she said because of her life being so busy planning a wedding and dating Eddie, her kids suffered by not spending enough time with them. To me, nothing is more important than your children and in hindsight I’m sure she would have done things differently knowing what the outcome would be. I can attest to that myself on my own past.
Peggy and I have formed a nice friendship and Peggy may not know all the background and the details of my relationship with Tamra and Shannon, but she is right, you must let things go and stop dwelling on them. Forgiving someone, but not necessarily forgetting, but it for sure can help heal the soul. Tamra tells Peggy she is happy. Clearly, anybody watching the episode can tell she is anything but happy. In the past, Tamra has been quick to say Kelly isn’t happy, which she claims is why Kelly lashes out. As usual, Tamra is projecting to attempt to influence others.
I am going to tread lightly here because, as Kelly and all of us know, when Tamra perceives somebody is “talking about her family” she gets livid. However, since TAMRA MADE HER FAMILY ISSUES A FOCAL POINT, I think I understand how Tamra’s attitude, vitriol, and behavior towards “family” affects our relationship. She seems to be always MAD all the time. If it’s not with me, it’s with someone else.
As Lydia stated, for most of our 10+ year relationship, Tamra and I were like family. Lydia is right. So, as Tamra explains herself, there is a pattern of ostracizing family when things don’t go her way. She admits she didn’t talk to her father for 10 years. Then she caught herself and modified that to say they talked occasionally. Who knows what the truth is there. At the risk of incurring Tamra’s wrath, yet again, I am going to point out what Tamra has highlighted, that she is ostracized from her daughter. I am not judging that or placing blame on anyone, just reiterating what Tamra has said. Now, with me, at one time her closest friends, her virtual sister, she is ostracizing me. Lashing out. Perpetuating her lie that I lied. Anything to hurt the person she perceives hurt her. Tamra said, “in my head, Vicki is dead”. Sound familiar? What did I really do to her? Did my ex BF really have that much of an impact on her life? Is it life altering to her that I had a private conversation about Eddie with Kelly? Did I steal from her, murder someone or do something unethical? NO! I repeated a rumor that was already out there. Enough! Why can’t she let it go? DEFLECTION!!
When Tamra had her heartfelt phone conversation with her mom about the pain that comes from avoiding conflict and her desire to talk through difficult topics, I wish she would implement that in her life and learn from it. She talked about the heartache that comes from having a loved one shut you out of their life. She talked about wanting to break the pattern. She is right. She should listen to her heart and take her own advice. It made me sad, as I don’t think we should be in this place of so much anger towards each other.
Towards the end of the episode in the wake for her browbeating Peggy, Tamra says “she is pissed”. Then in the limo with Shannon when she is spinning what happened she repeats her big lie again, that I lied about “Brooks having cancer”. Why is she so fixated on this? I have explained over and over again about my past relationship with him and she doesn't want to hear or listen to me. What benefit did I get by this so called “lie”? Hasn't she read his statements that I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM REVEALING HIS FALSE RECORDS…THAT WAS 100% HIS DOING. I have lost three loved ones in the recent past from cancer and it’s disgusting to hear her keep saying this. Well, now I’m pissed too. A lie about a lie is still a lie. I can’t figure out why they are SO fixated on him!! I am the one who was hurt, I am the one who lost time and money by dating him which I will never get back. They lost NOTHING on his shenanigans. I’ll never know why he did what he did, but it’s been over 2 1/2 years and I’m trying to move on. Every time I hear them mention his name it makes me sick to my stomach. MOVE ON!!!
On a happier note, it was so nice and refreshing to see Doug and Lydia celebrating her birthday and their magazine. Lydia is a breath of fresh air, and a true Christian woman and I love being around her. Doug and her have a very special marriage and I their love for each other. The “spoiling” of Lydia is what every woman dreams of and she is one lucky lady.
I had no idea that Shannon was thinking about opening a restaurant and I’m with David on his apprehension on this. Opening restaurants are extremely risky, especially in Orange County. To operate the business to be successful, it must have a solid partnership agreement, solid business plan and be funded properly or it won’t succeed. The good news is her partner has a stellar past, so I’m more confident in the restaurant being a success. I sincerely wish her the best in her restaurant endeavor and am proud that she is looking out for her future by going to work.
My sentiments to Tamra are this: Stop trying to turn my friends against me. Stop trying to destroy my life with your accusations. Stop projecting your insecurities and bitterness on me. Stop lying about me and please let’s move on!
I hope that Tamra sincerely starts trying to truly live the Christian life she professes she does. She needs to start by opening her heart, forgive, and put all this negativity behind and stop dwelling on things that are not true. Once she does, I am sure she will be much happier and then hopefully we can be back to being friends. I can have “hope” now can’t I?
Lastly, you have not seen much of the expansion of my new office and my company. It’s been very time consuming and I can’t wait for you all to see the finished result. Thank you to all of you who encourage me to be the best I can be while being under this reality microscope. Visit my new website for life insurance quotes and other insurance options at www.cotoinsurance.com.
Hope you are enjoying the season so far.
Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram @vickigunvalson