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Finding Peace

Vicki explains the situation with Donn and how she is moving forward.

By Vicki Gunvalson

Well here we are at the close of Season 6, and I feel very sad. Sad about how my life has unfolded this year and sad about any conflict that I had with any of my cast members this season.

How to Watch

Watch The Real Housewives of Orange County on Bravo Thursday, July 11 at 9/8c and next day on Peacock. Catch up on the Bravo App.

For those of you that have supported me on my decision to file for divorce, thank you. For those of you that have a negative opinion about me regarding that decision, all I want to say is I’m sorry. My decision to divorce has been a long time coming. People who want to accuse me of working too much and think that is why my marriage suffered do not know the whole story, nor will you ever. Although my career and my company Coto Insurance & Financial Services is very important to me, it is not more important than my family.

I had no idea until we were sitting on the couch with Andy that they had previously met with Donn and interviewed him. It was so hard for me to see him talking about his pain, because the last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt him. The reality is Donn knew that I was filing for divorce as I told him the week before. I told him and had given him a letter explaining to him that I think it was time to part ways, that the marriage was too far gone, and that I wanted to maintain a respectful separation. Donn was surprised at the fact that I had to actually serve him with a processor the week later. My attorney had told me if I did not serve him, he could have gotten into our joint bank accounts and moved money around without my knowledge. Serving Donn locked up the accounts, which guaranteed me that could not happen.

What the viewers didn’t know is I never wanted this to be played out on this series. I kept my decision very quiet for months and didn’t want any of this to be filmed. Unfortunately, my production company knew something was going on with us, and set up a meeting with me at my office to discuss what they had seen all season long on tape. I told them everything was fine and that we were just going through a rough patch. I’m not a very good liar, and I broke down crying saying I didn’t think we were going to make it. From there I spiraled down and told Tamra at dinner while we were filming.

When Donn said in his interview that I orchestrated the entire thing and that a man deserves dignity and respect, I have to respond saying by saying I agree and disagree. I did not orchestrate anything. I filed for divorce, and if that’s considering “orchestrating,” then I’m guilty of that. Donn’s comments about respecting him and giving him dignity -- I did both. I respected Donn through our entire marriage and even after we filed. In fact, I still respect Donn. We have known each other for a very long time, and the last thing I want to do is to hurt him. What you don’t know is I’ve been hurt too by many things that Donn has done to disrespect me, and I will never talk about it or disclose any of them. What good will it do? There is no easy way to dissolve a marriage, but I sincerely feel Donn and I have both been handling this as best as we can.

When Andy asked me if I was dating, I admitted that I was. It has been eight months since I filed, and the reality is I am happy. I really don’t know if it’s the best timing or whether I should be dating already, but sometimes you just can’t control timing. It’s important for you to know, I filed for divorce in October and the reunion was taped in May. I want you to also know that my separation was not based on the influence of any one else -- Not Tamra, not a man, not my family, no one! I don’t know what my future holds for me, but as of right now I’m taking care of me. I'm taking it slow and finding peace.

On June 26th I’ll be on the Today show in NYC so stay tuned to watch that around the 8am hour.

I am proud to say that on June 29th, stay tuned for a new TV show that I filmed in Richmond, Virginia called Messiest Home of America. It was a life-changing week for me helping this lady that had been hoarding for over fifteen years. This is another type of show I would like to do in the future. A show that can change people’s lives and have a positive impact on someone, versus this catty fighting that tends to happen on our show.

Below is a link to an interview that I did for Bankrate about the importance of life insurance. For those of you that do not have a policy yourself, I would highly recommend looking into it. Rates are at the lowest they have been, and we have a policy that approves you within 24 hours with no medical exam.

I would highly encourage you to visit my website for a free quote at

I am so excited about my future, and I know that God has his hand on me along the way. I have faith that I will come out of these sad times a more peaceful, secure, and happy person.

If you want a good reading book for the summer to inspire you to be the best that you can be, setting goals, and more information about me and my up bringing read More than a Housewife. It’s available on my website

As we travel through the journey of life, we should choose our destination wisely. Sometimes when we arrive to our destinations, we see it’s not what we dreamed it would be, but don’t be disappointed. Think of all you would have missed if not for your journey of life. It’s not where we come from, but who you became along the way. Today is a gift, that’s why it’s called the present. Enjoy your life, follow your gut, go after your dream, and don’t let anyone or anything stop you.

I wish you all an enjoyable summer. Be safe and I hope you all find the peace in your life you deserve.

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