Rob Brann: Honestly, it hurts to hear Ro say that I don't care about her passion. I support her in every way possible, and always have. For example, I'm always the first person to celebrate her accomplishments, whether it was supporting her on game day when she was cheering in the NFL, or being a sounding board while she was launching her creative business. What I said during the argument clearly didn't reflect how I feel, and ultimately I said some things that I didn't mean to say.
Bravotv.com: Rochelle, how does it feel when Rob focuses on music, but doesnt support your own passion?
Rochelle Brann: Pursuing your passion is all-consuming, especially when you're carving out snippets of time around a full time job! You literally cram weeks of creativity into a couple hours, and it's hard not to covet that "me" time. But I'm actually hurt, and more than a little pissed off, when Rob doesn't show me support or interest the way I expect him to. I'm trying to balance my time just as much as him, but his disinterested behavior is just another way that his only child syndrome affects our relationship. He's used to worrying about himself first, taking care of his needs first, being the center of attention. Plain and simple, he thinks about Rob first and then I come secondary, so he can't understand why it's important for me to have him listen and support my goals in life, and not just when it's convenient.
Bravotv.com: Tell us about the blow-up in the kitchen - where were each of you coming from and what is it like watching it back?
Rob Brann: Wow, this looked a lot worse than I remember it being. There were definitely some things that Ro said that made me feel attacked. Ultimately, I go into "lawyer mode,” and from that point, it's really about winning the argument, by any means necessary. My point was that I just wanted Rochelle to proceed with caution. I think the boiling point for Ro was when I mentioned that she was "nobody off the street." I didn't mean to sound so hurtful, but I was trying to get the point across to Ro that she should calculate all of the risk involved in making such a huge change, before diving head-first. With two personalities like ours, it's easy for a calm debate to escalate into an ugly argument.
Rochelle Brann: I went into watching that scene with my hands over my eyes. Damn, that was uglier than I remember! Sometimes clear communication just goes out the window and it's because in our relationship, we're clearly both the alpha. This argument basically boiled down to the fact that Rob isn't a great listener, and was missing the point I was trying to make. I just wanted to be heard, and needed him to be my partner. Never did I say that I was going to childishly quit my job, and throw our family into financial jeopardy! I have always been an independent woman who made her own decisions, but I assumed that because we are now married, Rob would want to be included in those decisions. I wanted him to understand WHY I was unhappy with my career, so that WHEN I began making changes, he wouldn't be blindsided. Clearly though, he jumped to conclusions, got defensive and regrettably said some hurtful things!
Bravotv.com: What were you thinking after your argument - how did it impact how you view you relationship?
Rob Brann: This wasn't our first rodeo. As you saw during the end of the episode, I was already looking to make amends and clear the air. I CANNOT go to sleep with any unresolved conflict. It was a must for me to follow up with Ro to let her know that I may have said a few things that I didn't mean and that I hoped she didn't misinterpret my words - which she clearly did. When all else fails, I always try to inject humor into our relationship and I thought by asking about the onion rings that she'd laugh, call me an ass**** and then we'd make amends. That didn't quite happen!
Rochelle Brann: Things were raw for a while. Rob obviously felt bad and wanted to smooth things over right away, but admittedly, I just needed to be left alone to process things. I'm not the kind of person who can switch feelings on or off, so I was just plain mad for a few days. The "leave me alone, don't talk to me, don't kiss me goodbye, make your own damn dinner" kind of mad. I hate to admit that, but I know other ladies out there will get where I'm coming from. It made me start to question whether we had talked enough about our relationship needs, before we decided to get married!