Could it be true? Are there really two men this week as clients? Hooray! Yes, we finally went back to our roots and had the pleasure of not dealing with crazy millionaire women. But wait, our sigh of relief only lasted for as long as this sentence, since we had yet again challenges on our hands.
Let's start on the lesser of the two evils with my client Doug. I do have to tell you Doug is believe it or not a really sweet guy and just needs MULTIPLE slaps upside the head and then he will be good to go! When we first met him and his tattoos, spray on abs, and four piece suits (who wears a vest, tie, and jacket?) we knew we were in for some work. Then he opened his mouth and all we heard was, "Blah, blah, SEX, blah, blah, SEX, SEX, blah." Okay, now it's gone from some work to MAJOR work. Ladies and gentlemen we have a sex-a-holic in the house. Sorry Doug, but true story.
Doug's type, besides anything that has a hole, is exotic. Thanks to my whip cracking on Andreea, we had plenty of lovely exotic girls for "Sex Machine" to pick from. The goal was to try to break Doug of his sex happy ways and to focus at the mixer on getting know them on a mental, not physical, level. Oh yeah, and to show up with his shirt on.
OMG - what a freaking creep David is!! I love how his brother said he gets lot's of girls. Seriously, the only girls he gets are the ones you pay to creep on! EEWWW!!
Ilene deserves a medal for not throwing up! I couldn't even watch them attempt to eat that. Even an adventerous pallette would balk - - but a first date being ordered too? I think not. While I think the guy was actually trying - Wow. And when he said, "you gave me that?" Oh, buddy she was way too good for you. They gave you the best.
To Dave the Investment Banker Called Creepy It's January 2011 and I've just seen this episode. I'm an attractive woman who has Ivy degrees and a circle of warm friends and family. I want to give you sympathy right now and some advice. I am not interested in you for myself but I hope the advice here will help you. You want to get married and have children but I think you should stop thinking of a woman as something you can purchase or pick up as if from a shelf. The right woman is not someone you will "pick" i.e. identify and point to and say "yes, that's you I want," but instead she will be a woman who is both someone you are attracted to and someone who is attracted to you as a person, not just attracted to you physically. You have to make yourself appealing, inviting, warm, receptive, impressive for more than the exclusive experiences you can buy her. Of course there is the type of girl you can purchase but that's not what you seem to want. You want a good girl, a sweet woman, the wife and mother and she will have the "tests" for you... it will not be your place to test her initially. Courtship rituals are about the man making an effort to impress the woman (at first). After she is receptive to you, after she has confirmed interest in you, then you can begin to "test" her but not nearly in the aggressive way that you attempted with that boorishly unappealing date. I saw that and said "How dare he!" And a good woman of dignity who is worthy of being your wife, even a gentle woman who would be an agreeable wife, would not tolerate such conduct and treatment from any man, much less a man she has just met. There is going to be the temptation to say that the version of you on the screen is solely the product of editing, clips that didn't show your best self. The insecurity that you feel (and you can admit to having some insecurity about your physical attractiveness -- your brother is the more handsome of you two and has helped you as a wingman, right?) is something that can actually make you appealing/endearing if you allow it to make you open, vulnerable in making conversation. Your goal is to get to know the attractive woman and to let her get to know you, not to give her aggressive tests (as if you are royalty simply because you have impressive bankroll). Because of my education at elite schools and my work, I've met men like you, men who make more money than you. I've never seen someone quite as awkward but there were one that came to mind as being close. And a mansion sized apartment in Manhattan couldn't and didn't keep me around. The most appealing thing about him was in his moments of insecurity, he was able to express something close to his real and genuine self. Find a good therapist, just to discuss your dating issues and presentation on date issues, your view of your own attractiveness. You'll be fine and I wish you the best.
That whack job Dave is an idiot. Besides having serial killer stares and attitude the guy has no clue. That duck egg he thought was such an epicurean delight and not found any where in the world is called baloot and is a duck egg put in the sand and incubated for 19 days and sold on the streets in Manila and only at night, and mostly to people who have imbibed too much. The only way Patty sets this guy up is to have him wait outside the ladies prison and check out the ones that are being released.