True Blood Versuses The Wannabe
Patti shares her thoughts on William and Brandon's dates -- and her Louisiana accent.
Full transcript after the jump
Again, I've got two millionaires this week. So I’ve got player wannabe William. OK so he's got an umbilical cord that's attached to his mother. Alright, Jewish Messiah Complex 101. And on top of it, he thinks he’s a reformed playboy that can get any girl at ten paces away. Newsflash you can't! He's a banker that made money overnight, and got rid of his first girlfriend for his second girlfriend when he started to think he could trade up George Clooney-style. OK!
Then we've got Brandon. Little Bon Temps from True Blood country and New Orleans. He's got a JT attitude, scruff on his face, super cute, but he's wounded. He doesn't even know if he can hunt and fish anymore 'cause his last girlfriend left him because he neglected her. And he admits. He admits it.
So what do I do? I decide I’m going to make a full on, big full-scale mixer for both of them. I bring tons of hottie patotties for William and tons of hottie patotties for Brandon. In fact, I thought for sure each of them were going to catfight over one of them. And yo and behold that's what happened.
Brandon picks from the minute the two girls he wanted. Ultimately he picks Jaclyn. Well what do you think William wants? William picks the same girl. Not because he really wants it, it's just because Brandon does, and he has to be a wannabe, an any be, in any place at anytime. I'm like, "No, no, no, no. it's not gonna happen.” We ask Jaclyn, "Who do you want?" She picks picks Brandon. I was so proud of her. But I had to make a pick. So I went to my second choice, and she said no to William. Now William is lost without a date. What's a girl to do? My first choice for William was Farrah. I said, would you mind going out with Farrah? Farrah would you mind going out with William. They both said yes.
Brandon goes on his date first. He knocks it out of the park. He has this fabulous dinner and paragliding. It’s romance, romance. They make several other dates. They hang out over the weekend. She becomes the Saturday night girl. Jaclyn won the night. I mean the two of them could not be cuter then they were.
Now it's up to William. William picks the stupidest date -- the Polo – which neither one has played. They have to spend all day in a lesson. They don't get to interact with each other. She has a teacher. He has a teacher. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Of course he doesn't listen to the matchmaker. He does what he wants. But for some reason, Farrah likes him. Even with his Douchey Mcdouchey, player, wanna-be ways. She sees right through that exterior and actually likes him. He starts asking her out. Bringing her roses. They're a match too. They're another match this week. So now I'm six for six.