Phaedra Parks

Phaedra talks about relationships and regrets.

on Nov 1, 20100

As I am packing to travel abroad for the next few weeks, I am feeling rushed, anxious, and am having writer's block.  So, please forgive me for my brevity this week. Tonight's episode centers around relationships and the struggles that most of us encounter while in them.

Relationships are an important part of life. When they are healthy, they can be satisfying, provide protection, stability, and prevent loneliness. Unfortunately, even the best relationships can often be very painful. Sheree is going on a third date. Nene is having marital problems. Kandi grapples with the relationship between her daughter and her daughter's father as well as her own relationship with her father. Kandi relies on her mother's strength and maternal wisdom for support and guidance. The wisdom of Mrs. Joyce, Kandi's mother, is evident as she delivers the most poignant advice of this episode, "You only have one life ... I would give myself a chance to have a life."  This statement resonated in my mind, because I think sometimes we forget that life is about taking chances; knowing when to go, but also knowing when to stay. 

While no one can live without any regrets, we all deserve to be happy and to enjoy our lives. Our experiences, whether bad or good, build our character and shape who we are as individuals. I would not be where I am or who I am today if it were not for those character building situations that some of us consider "regrettable." Mistakes are stepping stones to an evolving life. Ultimately, life is not about waiting for the storms to pass, it's about learning how to dance in the rain. 

Xoxo,

Phaedra

320 comments
Drea from Ohio
Drea from Ohio

I like Phaedra. I was leary beause of the whole pregnancy due date thing but we all have our faults. She is educated and good at what she does. Her hubby is the bomb too. she is very well spoken and always so empowering. All the housewives have there faults but at the end of the day do you know anyone that doesn't and thru all the seasons, I actually like all the housewives. Go housewives of ATL

mschazz015
mschazz015

Phaedra, please revisit your intro, "I'm a Southern Belle", no sweetheart, you are a country bumpkin that needs to invest in a full set of Hooked on Phonics. For someone that has a law degree, you utter the most dumbest comments and mispronounce words that a so-called educated Southern Belle should roll out with ease. HHHmmmmmmmm Barbarian Cream, really.... Let's admit it, you were pregnant before you got married, big woo..... Stop fronting, I would have been pregnant too if my husband was that fiiiiiiiinnnnnnnneeeee. How he tolerates your tail is beyond me, but he likes what you have afforded him so I'm not mad at him. Value him and what you two have created together. Blessings.......

Jamie D.
Jamie D.

That was beautifuL. I have to admit I wasn't expecting that. Further more, I feeL as if I've been dancing in the rain my entire Life (when it comes to reLationships). Phaedra has a marriage and great career. My career is okay but because of my career I have never been abLe to keep a substantiaL reLationship. I think true success comes when you're abLe to baLance out both.

Much Love, JD

Sueb
Sueb

Phaedra- I like you the best for your appreciation of the finer things and promoting culture. And, when I saw Apollo carry you upstairs when you returned from the hospital after your C-section I thought "what a lucky,lucky girl" you are. Of course he is very handsome but he's a gentleman and such a great dad- I love the scenes where Apollo is with Aidyn- he's am amazing dad. So to all the haters that want to focus on his past(KZ), it is pure jealousy! I wish you and your darling family the absolute best and look forward to more scenes of you and your family.

Janmarie_85
Janmarie_85

Phaedra,

I really hope and pray you read my post. I think you are a wonderful woman and example for young black women. I love you class, strength, and smarts. Phaedra words can't express how much you mean to me. As a single mother who has and still is struggling with self-esteem issues. Watching you is my encouragement my. If you ever have the opportunity to met one of you biggest supporters. Please, let it be me. I love you Phaedra, support you, and I defend you on this site when ppl try to trash talk you.

Tica in TX
Tica in TX

I am glad you were able to visit my beautiful country of origin Costa Rica, and hope that while you were there you were able to enjoy the genuine people that Costa Ricans are, our beauty is in nature and in the nature of genuity of our people.

In regard to this relationships blog, I sure wished you speaked more about your own relationships than dishing on the relationships of others. It seems like your character is more outer-reflective than self-reflective. The advice I would like to give is for you to cultivate, nourish, prune and let your own relationship with your husband grow. You guys just seems to lack intimacy, and intimacy can only come from looking into each other souls and heart and loving what you see. You seem to be on a mission to cover up with material things. Your assistant or the people who work for you can not cultivate marital intimacy for you, unless you expect them to help themself to your man. At the end of the day a law degree, money and expensive gifts can not warm your heart. And unless you let the people close to you: your husband and son, share in your heart, it will continue to be shallow, hallow, lonely and cold. Because the things you say on TV and your inability to be genuine can only come from an empty heart. Peace, love and let your life be "pura vida" (a life full of joy and love)

P.S. this comes from a woman that looks and let her heart be seen by her husband, children and the people she loves and even those I don't. I am satisfied!

My
My

Married in November baby arrives full term in May huuuummm ok southern bell. It wouldn't be a problem if you didn't lie about it. It happens everyday. But when you create a facade that becomes a part of your life. Now thats a problem. I don't have a law degree but the math just doesn't add up. It's the Real Housewives of Atlanta. Try being real

Denise Ht
Denise Ht

Unfortunately embarrassingly so.

TOBIE82
TOBIE82

Phaedra, when you read the comments, dont take them as mean, take them as CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. People like you or they would totally ignore you. USE Your Hubby more. He 'compliments' you as a person. He helps make you who you are. See if you can get him say more & be on the show more. Let people see you the way he does. And for the record, I have met Lawyers that really are extremly good at being lawyers yet totally cluelles in real life situations. NANCY GRACE occassionally has her moments- she dont believe people switch out their sims cards in phones (in Casey Anthony case) I know several people that do it just to keep from charging their phone at the time or whatever reason but sometimes LAWYERS forget that simple people live simplier lives... PUT YOUR HUBBY ON THE SHOW MORE- He'll make you more understandable, good luck.

Just S
Just S

OH! MY! I just commented and it was almost word for word. Are we the only ones that caught the "BARBARIAN " and the Woman "DEATH" comment????? Also I commented that she received her Law degree from the same place Dr. Tiy-E printed his from???? PHONY is the word I most associate with this one, and Clueless. It is good to see that someone else noticed the inconsistencies in her speech and her inability to express herself correctly.

shalee53
shalee53

Yeah., I guess that;s what you get from a southern lady with a law degree. You can take the girl out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the girl. Oh Well. Atlanta has turned into the phoney capital of the world and your proof positive of it. By the way, your child is gorgeous like his dad.

joejoe_no1
joejoe_no1

If you truly believe what you blogged, why do you spend every show putting down the other people on the show? They like their lives, too. But you seem to think Kim is genuine because she shops at the same places you shop. Does it seem tacky or "unsouthern" to you that she gets her money from a married man? Seems like you would have a lot to say about that.

Welch
Welch

LMBO that is true! I was appalled when she called him a Caveman!?

Veeee
Veeee

Phaedra, you are hilarious! Just try to chill out and be yourself on the show. I just think you are trying too hard and you come off as being phony to others. Someone else wrote about how you have "book smarts" but not a whole lot of common sense. You don't want to be portrayed as such! Your due date is no one's business and I can't believe they asked who your baby's daddy was!!! You are indeed a breath of fresh air in comparison to the other "violent" loud mouths on the show. Just get some baby books! Like, really. And your husband is fine. LORD JESUS, he is fine! He just doesn't seem to be comfortable in front of the camera, so maybe if you try to make him feel more comfortable? Maybe? Anyway, I really like your charm & hope they keep you on the show!

chynadahl
chynadahl

Actually, I too had a csection and towards the end I felt a lot of the cutting and pulling as they were sewing me back up. Not everyone's experience is the same.

simpleeme
simpleeme

NO SHE IS NOT I USED TO THINK KIM WAS SIMPLE BUT SHE HAS HER BEAT. ALL I WANNA KNOW IS WHO IN THE WORLD GAVE HER A DEGREE FOR LAW? SHE IS LEGALLY DUMB

jayjay10
jayjay10

eeeee pickles the mouth, especially apollo eeeeeeee, mmmm not a picture perfect moment. However, hope you are enjoying your new baby. If you ever have another, please use another word besides gross to describe he or she. For example, "awww", "myyyyy baaby", or just don't say anything. Happy Thanksgiving.

Shout
Shout

Phadrae, You are absolutely a Southern Gal..and I love it..and honey..who cares if your husband did time..he is too fine..and your mom is going to have to get over the fact that you getting married and having a baby does not add up...you are very grown...and an independent adult with the finest husband of all the house wives...be Thankful you found a good looking...fine..brother in Atlanta who wanted to marry a sister and is not into brothers...you know how they roll in Atlanta..good luck with the new baby...

Viewer Mrs. FrankQuick
Viewer Mrs. FrankQuick

Oooooooh! Phaedra!!!!, your baby is gorgious, congratulations. It was an honor for us (the public) to be allowed to share your experience of child birth. Your son is adorable, your husband is adorable, and you are even more beautiful as a MOMMY!

stargazer92234
stargazer92234

I love love love you! You are too funny and spoiled.

SanyM
SanyM

you are by fair the most entertaining Housewive of all shows! People need to loosen up a bit.

Aloha808
Aloha808

Your baby is the CUTEST ever!!! Congrats to you and Apollo!

texmexi
texmexi

You are hilarious!! I loved the BARBARIAN creme comment. Maternal death. Your shock at not knowing what to expect with the birthing process. Really now. LOL Besides dying from laughter every time I hear a word uttered from your mouth... I have to ask one question. Where did you earn your law degree? Please don't say it was from the same university that Dr. Tiy-E attended. LOL ;) We all know lawyers are smart. You are super sassy and country, but the persona you are on Bravo leaves me confused as to who the real Phaedra is? I know there are some brains in that body!! (It can't all be editing...)

Tina123
Tina123

Phaedra, Congratulations on your new son, I love you and Apollo. Apollo, is a class act I hope to see more of him on the big screen. Phaedra, you make the show I appreciate your class and I am sure you will be a great mom.

mistylady
mistylady

Phaedra, Ridiculous, all that screaming you did tonight while having a c-secetion to have your baby was ridiculous, I had ac-section and you don't even feel any pain, also Ifeel like you are such a phoney and it is just a matter of time before Apollo realizes it, stop being a self promoter.

cookingmom
cookingmom

I agree. Having a baby is the closest thing to death. What?! I delivered 2 babies naturally with problem pregnancies but the babies were born fine. However, I was in a car accident, had multiple procedures and coded after a procedure. Spent 5 days in ICU and 11 days total in hospital.That's as close to death as it comes. Not delivering a healthy baby to a healthy mother with no complications!

Biker Girl
Biker Girl

Phaedra, you do such a great job at minding other people business, putting others down and being your own cheerleader. YET you do such a poor job at telling the truth, expressing love for otheres or something as simple as "smiling". Phaedra, lets try to love others as much as you love yourself, protect others as much as you protected your "due date lie" and include your husband on the decision making just as you have excluded him in the decision making. lets have a little more WE and a lots less I.

Marysaund
Marysaund

I am so glad someone caught that ridiculous comment! Priceless!!

Marysaund
Marysaund

Lady Fingers? In all of the Lady Fingers I have ever been served none included BARBARIAN CREME! Priceless!!! And I guess Phaedra must have been working out (as she claims she does daily??? - ha!), getting her daily massage or mani/pedi when "MATERNAL MORTALITY" was discussed in classes while she pursued her many degrees. Thanks for perpetuating your image more each week!

Phaedra Fan
Phaedra Fan

Phaedra, you are so right about the comment you made on the first episode. "If their not talking about you, then that means your not relevant" Honey, you are very much relevant on these blogs.... :-)

Donrielle
Donrielle

Girl u the reason why I watch the show, to see what next

BAMA  GIRL
BAMA GIRL

Phaedra, after last night's show I'm not sure what to say but Congrat's and your son is beautiful. You are a TRIP!! Everytime you speak I lean in to listen because I don't want to miss a word of whatever CRAZY your about to say. Hope this show is a real learning experince for you. I will say you make for some great TV. Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!

ErinH
ErinH

Honey you think having a baby is the closest thing to death?? Try delivering as 12lb baby natural and having to have surgery after wards and you baby not having a heart beat or a pulse when she is born. They have to revive her and then you not being able to see you baby until you get released from the hospital. Then you go see her at a children's hospital and sitting there looking at her not knowing if she is going to live or not. Talk to me when you have been through that!!

beachbumlala
beachbumlala

That's not the Thanksgiving this true Southerner was raised on. It depends on southern regions, your family's traditions and recipes that were passed down. Our tradition is turkey with gibblet gravy, cornbread stuffing, dumplins, sweet potatoes (yes, without marshmellows) fresh green beans cooked all day with bacon and onion. And for desert, the usual pumpkin pie, but also a PEEcan pie. My grandmother always made me a peach cobbler. Everything is from scratch and nothing comes out of a can.

RNsRule
RNsRule

Actually, as an RN who has worked in Neonatal Nursing, it is just a small herniation that sometimes happens in babies. African American babies are more prone to this, not sure why. But you're correct in the part about there is really nothing you can do. We aren't even using alcohol or that blue dye anymore. Just keep it clean and dry until the little umbilical stump falls off.

Endie
Endie

Why did you stop writing blogs on bravotv.com? I guess you didn't like the responses you were getting.

Scary
Scary

Especially when she says "Lady Fingers with Barbarian Cream". Someone help her please.

VT
VT

Let's see.... Married in November and baby born FULL TERM in May... Ready to start telling the truth? Phaedra, repeat this out loud, "Yes, I was knocked up BEFORE getting married." You may not get an invitation this year to cotillion! Good luck, and may your son never be afraid to tell his parents the truth.

Shereda
Shereda

I absolutely LOVE you PHAEDRA. I think you are naturally humorous and fun. Who cares about your do date or if you sometimes appear a little snobbish. NO ONE is perfect. People should learn to embrace their attributes as well as their flaws and be comfortable with who they are as you seem to be. I wish you nothing but happiness and success. You are a good contrast to NENE. god bless her and may be bring her success in her relationship. you are amazing. Congrats on the little baby.

LongIsland Girl
LongIsland Girl

LOL!!!!! So true...she's carrying on about Phaedra's due date like it's affecting her health or something. Is it hurting you THAT much??? LOL I like Phaedra...she's hillarious!

Andrea Taylor
Andrea Taylor

I don't like the way you talk negative about white people. It is sad that if someone who is white makes a comment another race does not like, They get torn down, But it is perfectly o.k to make fun of or call white people names that is not what A Southerner does. P.S I am not white. I just think the crazy talking should stop!!!

me from dc
me from dc

Mrs. attorney to the stars i know you can multi task too good to blog about the show.

justme10
justme10

If it's with HER HUSBAND than who cares and it does not disqualify her as a child of God; by the way let God be her judge and not you because he is still jdging your character as well...at the end of the day she has to deal with the type of person she really is not you.

 rhiannon
rhiannon

Phaedra, your baby was born looking very cute. I laughed at how you think out loud all the time, especially when you said that he looked chinese. I guess you just like to speak your mind.

mz dee
mz dee

PHAEDRA??????? is that u girl?????

Shani1
Shani1

Love you Phaedra!!!! I love how encourgaging you were to LaTavia she has been so much. And congratulations on your new baby boy!

yanie916
yanie916

OKAY WHY LIE. TRYIN TO ACT LIKE SHE ALL THAT. SHE WAS KNOCKED UP FROM DAY ONE. SHE JUS DIDNT WONT TO LOOK TRASHY INFRONT OF HER MOM. AND SHE DID ANY WAY WHEN THE DR. SAID SHE WAS 40 WEEKS. COME ON.

tzona47
tzona47

HAHAHAHA!!! That is such a good point!! I had NEVER heard of sugar in the va-jay-jay EVER! She sure did know all about that, didn't she!? But sounds like a dumb little girl when it comes to WORLDLY points such as children and childbirth... You don't have to have children to know what happens, weirdo! Phaedra, you really are embarrassing to watch... I was watching the show since season 1, and I like everyone but you, it's a shame that I'm seriously considering not watching anymore because of how embarrassing you are...