Cast Blog: #RHOBH

Oh Paul

Brandi: I Don't Enjoy Anger or Grudges

Eileen: I Could Feel the Tension at Kyle's

Lisa R Reflects on That Bittersweet Episode

Yolanda: These Are Teaching Moments

Kim: My Heart Felt So Big

Kyle: Kim and Monty's Relationship Is Unique

Lisa V.: I Needed an Uncomplicated Friendship

Brandi: Kim Is a Survivor

Eileen: Brooke Was a Gorgeous Bride

Lisa R.: I Couldn't Be More in My Element

Brandi: I Felt Like a Grown Up

Yolanda: I Was Doubting My Parenting Skills

Lisa V.: A Scare Can Be the Ultimate Lesson

Eileen: Yeah, Vincent and I Bicker Sometimes

Lisa R.: My Heart Ached for Yolanda

Kim: The Call No Parent Wants to Get

3 Clues to Next Week's Episode

Brandi: Not a Good Time for My Phone to Die

Lisa V.: Hindsight Is 20/20

Kim: The Words You Never Want to Hear

Yolanda: 50 Is the New 30

Eileen: A Long Career Is the True Award

Kyle: An Invite to a Party Isn't the Answer

Lisa R.: God Bless Michael Bolton!

Quiz: How Well Do You Remember Episode 3?

11 #RHOBH Reactions That Sum up Our Lives

Kyle: I Would Take A Road Trip Over a Plane

Lisa: When You Reach Out, You Are Rewarded

Kim: Brandi and I Always Seem to Have Fun

Yolanda: A Homemade Meal Goes a Long Way

Brandi: I Was Surprised Adrienne Was So Receptive

The Real Story Behind Lisa R.'s Depends Ad

3 Clues to Next Week's Episode

Quiz: How Well Do You Remember Episode 2?

3 Times the 'Wives Were Just Like Us

Quiz: How Well Do You Remember Episode 1?

Kyle: Brandi Was Looking for Trouble

Lisa's First Impression of the Ladies

Yolanda: Fasten Your Seat Belts

Q&A: How Are Camille, Adrienne, and Taylor Now?

Oh Paul

Adrienne's answers your burning questions about Paul's pool outfit and her bbq.

Oh, Paul.

I suppose I could start and end this blog with that, and I have a feeling all of you would understand. Say it with me -- in half laughter, half did-he-really-just-do-that? Oh, Paul. Right.

In his defense, Paul does have a point. Jackpot does love to spend some "private time" in Paul's closet, and he usually leaves a present of the odorous variety behind. But it's not like I trained Jackpot to do that. I definitely never said “Jackpot, not in Mommy’s closet. Go in Daddy's!" It's more like I just haven't been able to spend a lot of time teaching Jackpot not to do that. I know, I know. I have to discipline him more (Jackpot, not Paul. Then again. . .). Any tips to help me out with him (Jackpot or Paul, take your pick) would be much appreciated. Bear in mind that there are three things you can count on -- death, taxes, and that Jackpot is going to have a mind of his own. The problem is that I'm a little amused by it. He's just so cute, you know? (Jackpot, not Paul. Fine, fine. Paul, too.)

OK, onto the rest. This episode was filled with moments that had me shaking my head and laughing in disbelief when I looked back on it. I have a feeling I know what you all want to ask, so let me just take a second to answer the vital, pressing and life-altering questions that are on your mind.

1) We do actually have steps that lead into and out of our pool. Shocker, I know. I have, in fact, seen Paul use them before. However, for some strange reason every time we get near a pool on this show, he feels the need to demonstrate jumping into a pool while wearing anything other than appropriate pool attire.

2) He does actually own appropriate pool attire.

3) Paul is apparently an exhibitionist.

4) What you didn't see was that earlier that evening was Paul teasing me that I should follow Kyle’s lead and learn how to cook for my husband. What you saw was me suggesting that he take Mauricio’s lead and figure out how to get a six-pack for his wife.

5) Boys will be boys, and I’m glad that Brandi's son decided to christen the hedges as opposed to the pool in his dire moment of need. As a mom of three boys, you learn to appreciate the lesser of all evils, so to speak.

6) Bernie is still miffed that Giggy had been drinking out of the wine glasses at a dinner he took a lot of pains to prepare, but he shouldn't have said what he said. In all truth, I don't really tolerate anyone in my household being snarky, and I should have stepped in. That being said, Bernie makes really amazing red velvet cupcakes. You do the math.

7) I don't own $25,000 sunglasses. I have three little boys who think that everything can be tossed through the basketball hoop. So if you do the math again, it's rather obvious they would turn those sunglasses into $25,000 worth of dust pretty quickly.

8) I tend to use the anatomically correct word when describing body parts.

9) I did buy Jackpot many chew toys, including furry ones, so that he would stop using Visco's tail for his own amusement. He isn’t biting. Literally. Instead, he continues to pounce on his brother’s rear pastern, hock, and tail. (See what I did there? Anatomical words.)

10) I don't have gravel on my driveway. Kyle is absolutely right, it ruins your shoes. And anything that ruins my stilettos is a no-no around my house -- except for Jackpot. He chews on my shoes and he can stay. (For the record, buying your dog furry toys shaped like shoes that have labels on them such as "Jimmy Chew" and "Manolo Barknik" does not actually discourage your dog from chewing on the real thing. Just in case you were wondering.)

Glad it was a lighter episode this week. I think we all needed it. Hope you laughed a little as well.

Now if you'll excuse me, I see Jackpot heading for Paul's closet again, and I think I might just be able to interrupt his gift-giving activities. We are working with a trainer now, and apparently I’m supposed to catch him before he goes.

Wish me luck!

Love you all!

XOXO,
Adrienne (@AdrienneMaloof)

Eileen: I Could Feel the Tension at Kyle's

Eileen weighs in on the tension at Kyle's and shares what she thought of the ladies right out of the gate.

Happy Holidays Everyone!

I really enjoyed seeing Lisa R at home with her girls. You gotta love teenagers, right? I totally related to her situation with her parents. My mom is 92 and was my best friend my entire life. It's been so hard to not have her as my parent anymore. I have become hers, as dementia has slowly crept into her mind. I never feel like I see her enough. Vincent and I would have her come live with us but our family decided the move away from her home 3 hours away would probably kill her. Thank God my brother is living with her. It helps to know that he's there but I still feel guilty and sad not to be able to see her more. It was nice to meet Lisa R's sister and parents. What an amazing artist her father was! I had no idea.

Yolanda is so down to earth and lovely. The real thing. I liked her immediately.

At Lisa V's, her swan attacked Ken. Hmmmmmmmm. I've been attacked by a swan before. I've got my eye on them! and their "feather diapered bottoms"! Hahaha.

It was so great to finally meet all the girls and their husbands. They are very interesting and dynamic people, right out of the gate. Kyle's home is beautiful and very warm and welcoming. I could tell that there was a lot of tension and lots of unresolved stuff going on. It was somewhat confusing because I didn't know all the backstory. Still, Vincent and I had fun sharing stories about "the business" with Kim, etc. And it was a great opportunity to have gotten to know the women better. Well, Brandi a little better than the others! LOL. I thought she was funny and definitely likes to lay it on the table. So to speak.

Merry Christmas and Joyous Holidays to you all!.

xoxoxoxoxoxxo