Cast Blog: #RHOBH

The Maloof Hoof

Yolanda: These Are Teaching Moments

Kim: My Heart Felt So Big

Kyle: Kim and Monty's Relationship Is Unique

Lisa V.: I Needed an Uncomplicated Friendship

Brandi: Kim Is a Survivor

Eileen: Brooke Was a Gorgeous Bride

Lisa R.: I Couldn't Be More in My Element

Brandi: I Felt Like a Grown Up

Yolanda: I Was Doubting My Parenting Skills

Lisa V.: A Scare Can Be the Ultimate Lesson

Eileen: Yeah, Vincent and I Bicker Sometimes

Lisa R.: My Heart Ached for Yolanda

Kim: The Call No Parent Wants to Get

3 Clues to Next Week's Episode

Brandi: Not a Good Time for My Phone to Die

Lisa V.: Hindsight Is 20/20

Kim: The Words You Never Want to Hear

Yolanda: 50 Is the New 30

Eileen: A Long Career Is the True Award

Kyle: An Invite to a Party Isn't the Answer

Lisa R.: God Bless Michael Bolton!

Quiz: How Well Do You Remember Episode 3?

11 #RHOBH Reactions That Sum up Our Lives

Kyle: I Would Take A Road Trip Over a Plane

Lisa: When You Reach Out, You Are Rewarded

Kim: Brandi and I Always Seem to Have Fun

Yolanda: A Homemade Meal Goes a Long Way

Brandi: I Was Surprised Adrienne Was So Receptive

The Real Story Behind Lisa R.'s Depends Ad

3 Clues to Next Week's Episode

Quiz: How Well Do You Remember Episode 2?

3 Times the 'Wives Were Just Like Us

Quiz: How Well Do You Remember Episode 1?

Kyle: Brandi Was Looking for Trouble

Lisa's First Impression of the Ladies

Yolanda: Fasten Your Seat Belts

Q&A: How Are Camille, Adrienne, and Taylor Now?

Lisa: Kyle and I Have Always Had a Bond

Brandi: Lisa Made Up With Everyone But Me

3 GIFs You Have to See From Next Week's Ep

The Maloof Hoof

Episode 13: Bravotv.com's Associate Editor ponders shoe lines and cotton candy.

If you're here for the shoe exchange I’m very sorry to disappoint you, but Adrienne has no more heels to hand out. Instead I can offer you this recap. And it's practically of BOGO quality.

Eating High Cotton
We open with Lisa having vodka cocktails in the kitchen. Well, sort of. Lisa arrives late to see the finished wedding invites -- and those crazy boxes are delightful. Kevin Lee you are a mad genius! "Fab-u-less" as you would say.

After admiring Pandora's box for a little while, the gang moves to the kitchen to try out eats and drinks for the reception. While Lisa just wants "somebody who's going to mix drinks," that's not possible. Kevin is only going to present her with people who make ridiculous cocktails with dry ice that can be poured onto their heads. Racks of lamb! Cotton candy!

Yes cotton candy, which leads Lisa to add another impressive impression to her repertoire -- an incredible spot-on performance of Taylor eating cotton candy circa Season 1. Oh Vanderpump, you incredible actress you. Don't ever change. However, the best part of the performance was Ken mentioning that Lisa's mouth "wasn't quite as big" as Taylor's. Zing!

Nailing It
Brandi, Taylor, and Kyle walk into a nail salon. . ., or as it turns out, just Brandi and Kyle walk into a nail salon. Taylor bailed on their day of hands only beauty, leaving those two to become besties at the salon.

And magically, they sort of do. The manicures go on as easy as a quick dry topcoat, even if Brandi suggested the next girls' outing was learning how to give "blow jobs" from a porn star. Maybe Brandi's efforts to court the 'Wives are a touch misguided. She might be better with the potato sack races Kyle suggested. Actually that sounds too dangerous? How about just food Brandi? A tea party -- no, no, no. Just a table with food and things sans séance. No psychics. No tea. Just plain toast. Perhaps an unbuttered toast party is just the thing to get everyone back on the same page.

Shoe Horn
While Lisa is having crazy people pour dry ice created cocktails on their head and Brandi and Kyle are pondering sexual techniques, Adrienne is planning her shoe line. That's right -- the business impresario is adding yet another endeavor to her belt. She's planning a line of shoes, and debuting a few at a fashion show at her home to benefit Step Up.

At her design meeting, Adrienne brings a smattering of hoofs she adores, which begins to really let you in on how much she hoards heels. They asked her to show her one favorite and she presented roughly 20 pairs. Oh Adrienne, you're one cat skeleton and creepy music sound away from hoarders. Look at the banquet table full of shoes she offered Kyle.

Thankfully, someone manages to shuttle the shoes into a closet in time for the big fashion show, which is a hot ticket. The whole affair is over capacity. Russell even attends! And of course Taylor and Camille are both there -- sacre bleu -- for their first post-tea party meeting.

But Camille and Taylor aren't the only ones having tension. Adrienne's still harboring a grudge against Lisa choosing to Viva Las Vegas without her at Pandora's bachelorette party

Sadly, I don't believe harboring Lisa's relatives is the right way to heal this feud. And even though the ladies seemed to come to a consensus, this tiff doesn't appear to be over. It's was the Sandra Lee of makeups (semi-homemade, zing! Learned it by watching Ken Todd).

And then the big Camille/Taylor confrontation finally happens, like all lady tiffs, outside of the bathroom. Camille emerges from the loo, only to end up face-to-face with Taylor. Surprisingly, it's very tame. They talk about disco balls and excuse themselves, managing to follow the old Housewives axiom, "this is not the time or the place." But when will that time/place be?

With that incredible spirit of goodwill in the air, the fashion show goes off perfectly. The Kevan Hall clothes look incredible. Adrienne's shoes look divine (once you lift up the dresses to see them). Paul adorably films the whole thing on his phone.

But the questions is: will a VanderPump come out of nowhere to steal the Maloof Hoof’s (Lisa's words) thunder?

Next week fingers will be pointing at Brandi's "wedge but no bra party." Slip into a forgiving top and tune-in.