Right around the time of my mom's visit I started to feel an overwhelming anxiety in the pit of my belly, similar to the one I felt years before when I fell into a depression while going through my divorce. It was the darkest time of my life, and with the help of therapy, anti-depressants, and a whole lot of white wine, I finally was able to find my happy again. With my dad ill with heart problems and us not talking for almost six months now (our longest break ever), I was starting to feel a little hopeless and that darkness was creeping back.
Since my divorce my dad has been my main man -- the only man that I knew I could count on, who would love me unconditionally and never leave me. I was starting to feel like I had lost him too. So get ready for a lot of a darker, slightly depressed Brandi -- with a little excess drinking and a little excess sadness thrown in -- as I take the journey to try to repair things with him. I am very self-aware, and I know when I am in a good place and when I am not. I have a great support group of friends around me that don't judge me for my faults or mistakes and who help me through my harder times. Moving on. . .
Watching Carlton and Kyle's lunch just seemed to be all sorts of uncomfortable, and I am glad I wasn't there. While I am very afraid of bees myself, I either scream and run or try to swat them away into the air. I have even been known to save a bee or two out of our new swimming pool. However when it comes to spiders, I am a straight-up murderer.