Jay Mohr

Jay thinks he may have stepped into RHONJ bizarro world.

on Aug 7, 2011

Lauren’s new spa at Chateau is about to open, and she has commissioned Ashley to come up with some promotional t-shirt ideas. That’s a brave move. I wouldn’t hire Ashley to do anything but take a nap. Ashley is a fantastic artist. I was very impressed by her artwork that was shown on the show. When it comes to Chateau t-shirts though, Lauren rejects the first two drawings faster than Simon Cowell dismissed William Hung. Maybe Ashley could design tour t-shirts for Melissa.
 
At the Gorga’s, Melissa is trying to keep all the kids mellow while she waits for Teresa to show up for their play date. Holy sh--, the Gorga kids are beautiful. Melissa seems to do a good job of entertaining everyone while they wait…and wait…and wait for Teresa to show up. Little does Melissa know that at Teresa’s house no one is even dressed yet.  There is a power struggle going on between Milania and Teresa. Milania wants to wear simple, basic colors and Teresa wants to dress her like Phyllis Diller. Milania goes to her dresser and throws all of her clothing out onto the floor. Maybe she was just putting them all ON DISPLAY, ON DISPLAY. Oh snap!
   
Back at Melissa’s house, she has set up a bouncy house and the kids are playing in it. Damn I wish I grew up Gorga. I would be gorgeous and I would have a drum kit and a bouncy house. As Teresa drives to Melissa’s house, it sounds like her girls are having Wrestlemania III and Gabriella just threw “Super Fly” Jimmy Snuka over the top rope.
 
Maybe Milania should listen to Teresa and wear what she tells her to, because when the Giudice kids show up at the Gorga’s, G to the ia walks in looking like Kid Rock. She looks cool as hell. Teresa and the baby have matching fur coats, and I wonder how long before Ashley tries to wear the baby on her head as a new hat.