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Jay Mohr

Th-Th-Th-Thick as Thieves

Jay Mohr is fairly certain the Manzos will soon take over all of New Jersey.

Jul 24, 2011

Chris calls the show and at first Caroline doesn’t know it’s him. Chris explains that no matter how much love he shows his stepdaughter (Ashley) he always feels like he is in second place. When Caroline figures out that it’s her brother calling into the show she almost cries. It’s unfortunate that during one of the most poignant moments in the history of the show there are program directors laughing their balls off over Caroline’s shoulder. It’s a good thing that Christopher and Albie didn’t catch that or those two guys would have been thrown in the dumpsters out back. Then the Manzos would own a radio station. The domination continues. Once the Manzos own their radio station they only play Tony Bennet records and commercials for The Brownstone.

At the Gorga house, Melissa is getting the kids ready for Teresa’s party. She explains to them that Christmas is Jesus’s birthday. In one of the sweetest and most honest things I have seen in a long time, Antonia asks, “How old is Jesus?” Melissa jokingly (I hope) replies, “89.” Normally I would have thought her answer was adorable and sweet, but after all the expressions she has butchered all season, I can’t be sure she wasn’t just taking a guess. That would mean the King was born in 1922. That would have made him eligible for the draft during WWII and instead of Calvary he may have died at Normandy. Totally different New Testament, instead of wearing crosses we would all be wearing German soldiers around our necks. For the record, for our non-Christian readers, despite logic, Jesus wasn’t born at zero. He was born somewhere between 7-9 A.D. That would make him around 2002 years old. 89 is fine with me though. 

Joey doesn’t want to stay long at Teresa’s house. He feels that it was inappropriate at the Christening fight for the parents to get involved. I guess that’s what separates the Manzos from the boys in Northern New Jersey. In the Manzo crew, parents are EXPECTED to throw down. Speaking of Manzos…

Next:
It's Coming...
It's Coming...

Jay's blog is on its way, we promise.

July 24, 2011 The Real Housewives of New Jersey Season 3 / Episode 9 / Jay Mohr
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I just sat here and read all of your blogs! Hands down the funniest crap I have ever read!

lmaO!!!!funny man and sad too. i feel for chris , and joe giudice needs to grow up smh come on dude how old are you name calling for no reason.

Love it as always, Jay!

Suge Knight territory lol!!!!

I LOOOOOOVED the Ling reference! You make me happy Jay Mohr!

Well, well, well Mr. Mohr - it's about damn time! LOL

Jay,

You cannot even imagine how much I missed your blog!! I laugh so hard that I get an entire abdominal workout!!! Th-th-th-thanks for bloggin'!!

Suge Knight territory indeed!!! lol

The episode was so good except the end where Joe was running his mouth about Joe and Melissa. It was awful!!!!!! He should be ashamed of his behavior. Maybe Melissa isn't wrong not wanting to be around them. Teresa was also rude about Melisssa's dress-this from someone with their ass hanging out of their dress.

I hate to say it, but I feel like you lost your touch. This blog wasn't as nearly as funny as your previous blogs. It seemed just like any old regular recap of the events that transpired with no real opinion or humor. Also, how about including an explanation for where last week's "It's coming" blog went?? At least acknowledge that a blog wasn't written even though readers were under the pretense that it was going to come. You just lost one reader! Take care!

Bed Bug Eddie? OMG you kill me. By the way did you notice that Chris and Jackie's dog is named after one of Vito Corleone's Son?

Okay, I'll be the first to admit it - worth the wait : ) Hilarious blog! Do not miss another week or somma my guyz are gonna hafta have a little talk widju - capisce? This IS Jersey after all, Badda-Bing!

I'm acting like a jealous housewife as I pose this question, but just where have you been all week?? I'm glad you finally returned to NJ-where you belong!!! Great blog Jay.

this wasn't your best blog Jay.. but still enjoyed it a little.

make it better next week!!!

Show was boring. Not looking for table flipping or fights but not else much there with this crew. Move on.

cannot believe what we heard Joe Giudice say at the end of the episode! He is the very worst.

And, SO glad you have a blog this week!

OMG I had withdrawals last week..was so happy to see you back and in rare form..be nice to my girl Teresa LOL...Melissa was hanging out top and bottom...wiping the tears out of eyes from laughing and waiting til next week.

Great blog! I missed you last week. Keep the funnies "cumin".

Finally!! Hilarious as always! Keep up the good work!

You are nothing short of amazing! I wait EVERY week for this! Gold!

The Maguire sisters...so awesome!

Finally!! Hilarious as always! Keep up the good work!

/waht about your blog from last week? Are you just going to leave me hanging? Seriously?!?

We also want a blog on last weeks show.

I really hate that you didn't blog last weeks episode. I was so looking forward to it.

I've been saying it for years, Ashley does not need to be on this show.

Bravo to you Jay! I feel that the Manzo's have the right to step in and keep peace at the Gorga party as Christopher is friends with Kim G's son. Speaking of the party, did you see the photographer lady hanging around? What's up with that?

Love ya, You make me laugh so hard I wet my pants. Can we have shirts that say TEAM MANZO??

I cannot believe that there was no mention of the best part of any episode thus far - Joe Guidice's reverse dropkick on the punching bag??? I don't understand how you can continue to defend them, not only were they late, but their drama ruined the holiday party and they didn't even thank or apologize to the Gorgas!

Too. Freakin. Funny! Loves it!

Thank you Jay, as usual you did not disappoint me. Please do pull what you did last week. I will forgive you only once.

Great job Jay, but what about ROSIE? How could you overlook her? I say out with Ashley and in with Rosie!

Jay, funny stuff as usual. You really went lightly on Kim G's lips, though. They were just crazy weird to me... like those plastic lips kids get at Halloween filled with juice, and why was her entire face so shiney? Maybe it was lip gloss?

Love it and you! Missed you last week.

Thanks for the recap - but we're still waiting for last week's. This is like reading a book with a missing chapter.

So glad you're back Jay! Love you!!!!!!!!!! This is hysterical...like always. I want in on the Manzo crew too!

Love this and you are spot on about Ashley!!! SPOT ON!

"This is Suge Knight territory..." you are not a well man, which is what I like about you.

Jay, once again you bring tears to my eyes and have me bursting out loud at work with laughter. I think maybe I will be called into the HR office soon because they are starting to think there may be some drugs being used at this desk! Love, love, love it keep up the great work. Lisa

All season you have been making my Mondays but this one takes the cake! Can I join you as a Manzo enforcer?

All season you have been making my Mondays but this one takes the cake! Can I join you as a Manzo enforcer?

Jay,you have a show coming up in arizona and my husband and I would not miss it for the world!!!Wish we could have made the Vegas(Harrahs improv rocks!) or Brea show but ya know how it goes or maybe not...lol.Anyhow see you soon ,cant wait.You are a riot!!!Keep on doing your thing...loving it...laughter is something the world need alot more of!!!

Jay's Blog has Make My Monday Magnificent.... :-)))

Love you Jay!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's funny whenever I read your blogs in my head I am hearing you say it as Christopher Walken.

Glad to have you back Jay, please don't ever leave us hanging like that again!! I totally agree with you about that freak Kim G. she looks worse every time we see her ( which is way too much in my opion ). RHONJ has plenty of drama without that old witch around. I also agree with you about Teresa's too short dress she wore at her family Christmas gathering, so funny how you described it! Then she had the nerve to say something about what Melissa wore, even though I am no fan of Melissa's, I can't believe Teresa said that. Love you Jay!

First off - LOVE YOUR BLOG!!! Second, what do you think of what Caroline said about the olive branch? I hope you agree with the rest of us and could see that Kathy was out to start trouble!!!

Jay...MY MAN! I love your blogs! I have been going through a very difficult time and whenever I get "really down", I read a few of your blogs and IMMEDIATELY start laughing. Thanks for your gift. ...PS....Caroline, MAKE THIS MAN A SOLDIER, NOW!!!!!!!!

I noticed that the Manzo’s dog is wearing a nice new Christmas sweater. I GUARANTEE you that sweater came off of Santino as payback for sleeping during Caroline’s show. Even the dog is gangster in that house. HILARIOUS!!!!! And the point about Teresa's skirt being too short? I think that was one of her girls' skirts and she grabbed it by mistake. Gia was probably looking for it earlier and couldn't figure out where it went.

Jay you are seriously HILARIOUS!! Your blog is the only thing that actually makes me LOL. Now can you please join facebook?? :)

Laughing ALL the way through. You CRACK me up Jay....you just HAVE to be on the reunion shows. love, love, love you.