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Kelly Killoren Bensimon

Taking the High Road

Kelly reflects on her bar blowout with Bethenny.

Mar 31, 2009

Since last week, I took my two girls on their spring break vacation to Palm Beach, Florida. I tried to ride dressage at Olympian Ashley Holzer's farm in Wellington, and I even learned how to play "stick and ball" or polo for my show on plumTV, called Behind the Hedges. When we weren't driving around Florida and in search of Abercrombie, I ran every day (even after I had that terrible horse accident earlier last summer), and we spent hours poolside drinking the best frozen cappuccinos.

When I got back to New York, it was back to school. Vacations are bittersweet, I am with the girls all day doing fun things and then poof!, they are back to school, and I miss them so much during the day. Having children is the ultimate luxury, and raising them is never boring.

I thought it was odd to be confrontational in public.

Life is a lot of fun from the eyes of an 8 and 10 year old. I am so grateful to have my little ladies.

On to the show. Ramona invited me to go to the Badgley Mischka fashion show. I have known Mark and James for a long time. Mark and I show in the same division in riding, though he is greatly superior to me. He is one of the most elegant riders I have ever seen. Their show was dreamy and ultra feminine. My ex-husband shot their ad campaign with the Olsen twins, which was one of the greatest campaigns they have done. The show was beautiful, and after the show we went into the VIP lounge for W hotels. There at the IMG fashion week tents, Ramona asked me how to deal with Simon. I was surprised, because I had no idea that she had an issue with them. They were talking at a previous show, and I thought it was odd to be confrontational in public. Does it really matter how people act? It matters how you act.

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Kelly, Kelly, Kelly... Where does one begin? Bethenny exuded class at the sit down while in comparison to your "harpyosity". To infer that some one is "down there" while you're "up here" is narcissistic at best. And to behave this way in pink boots just makes me want to break open my bottle of eye bleach. When you re-tell a story, remember the cameras are capturing your words. Lies are forever. It's astonishing to see a 12 year old trapped in an over 40 body. I'm not used to seeing such behavior in my circle. Simply stunning and sophomoric.

Kelly, you're a bully! It was incredibly surreal that you complained about Bethenny's so-called "high-school" behavior, and then you confronted her in that manner in the bar. I witnessed such talking-downs by bullies in my high school and middle school. Seriously, ten years ago I saw my high school's bully give the "you're down here, I'm up here" speech. Totally tasteless of you.

And then, how odd that you gave Ramona a speech about life being too short to stress about people you don't get along with. You followed up that speech with that verbal beating of Bethenny. You should have taken your own advice and just let Bethenny's off-hand remark go. Yeah it was rude, but let it go. It was a minute detail.

Finally, it was silly to feign shock at Jill asking you to help with the charity. You're on a reality show with her, and she was including you in the group so that you could be filmed together, interacting. Really, that surprised you?

Kelly,

You are also very good at manipulating people, and twisting the truth to your own advantage.

I think it is hilarious that you called Bethany up and met her at a bar to tell her that you are not her friend. Talk about being childish and sophomoric...that was so unnecessary and ridiculous...I couldn't believe it. I have to agree with Bethany. I think that you like attention and need to have everyone know how important and "well connected" you are. Don't worry you don't have to meet up with me to let me know we're not friends...I already know.

I have to admit, I was shocked that you reacted the way you did and asked to meet with Bethany and then you went off like you are better than her. I agree with Bethany, I think you are really nothing but a socialite and thats all you will be!

You are the one that needed a time-out , you acted like a child. Just because you didn't want to have your name put on something, doesn't mean you couldn't act differently. And you should have apologized to Bethany for flirting with her ex-boyfriend.

Are you kidding me? Asking somebody to meet you & then showing up 30 minutes after you were supposed to arrive is tacky & lacks any manners on your part! That's taking the "high road?" Also, if you aren't bothered with B because you are so above her, why keep talking about it & making sure the other women on the show know your side of it? You are one of the most insecure people I have ever seen! How sad!

Bethenny, I was so proud of you-standing up at the charity meeting to Kelly. She was rude to arrive late, her comment that Jill's charity work is "cute?" Who is she, to call and invite you for a drink to talk, then arrive Late to that, too!! She thinks you need a time out--Oh no, she couldn't even handle a conversation with you, and had to run away. Bethenny, you are way ahead of her and very sincere, I wish I had a friend like you. May you find success in all your ventures and a guy would be damm lucky to have you love him!

I hope you get what you deserve.

"I thought it was odd to be confrontational in public. Does it really matter how people act? It matters how you act." HAHAHAHAHAHA! Bethenny was right, you really are delusional and you're not working with a full deck. You are so hypocritical and you're always contradicting yourself. That'sprobably why people think you are fake.

I felt bad for you at your "time out" with Bethenny. You completely fell apart and you were so worked up, whereas she was calm and cool. I felt embarrassed for you and she obviously got to you because you were telling everyone that would listen about her "childish behavior." I hope when you watch the show back you begin to understand the way you come off to people. It would be great for you to see that you are NOT better than anyone and that you continue to say one thing and do another. "I'm up here and you are down here?" Is that the best you can come up with? Grow up.

Kelly, I think it is completely rude that you continue to to show up to different meetings late, and make no apologies about it. You act as if your life is busier or more important than others. Also, why do you think that you are so much "higher" than Bethany? She is the one helping out a charity, and you are the one who makes it abundantly clear that you are too good to participate with charity. It is clear that you are obsessed with celebrities and claim to be one yourself, though I have never head of you before this show. I think it's time for you to jump off of that high horse you love to ride and come back down to earth with the rest of us.

Am I missing somthing, seems like the story you tell is totally different from what is shown on the show (3/31/09). Team Bethany all the way, Bethany sat there while you totally insulted her. I thought that you wanted to meet her to have an "ADULT CONVERSATION", what a joke. Really, I feel sorry for you. You think very highly of yourself and trust me that is so unattractive. Step back and take a look, you are the only one that should feel like a complete ass. Change you ways sweetie, you will be a more secure person. Everything in your life could be taken away tommorrow, and the only thing that will remain is true friends. Climb down of you high hourse, no punn intended.

Kelly, you are delusional. The whole fight with Bethenny was ridiculous. It made you look like a bigger idiot.

Oh, Kelly!

You can say whatever you want! But your behavior spoke for itself on the show and it spelled R-U-D-E.

THis is tv and I understand that we only get a glimpse of who you all are. I can't judge you. But I will say that you have a low tolerance for people who aren't in your 'circle', its somewhat pretentious and disconcerting.. At the charity meeting, you could have waited and discussed your concerns with Jill privately (just as you ended up doing)So essentially it was YOU who voluntarily stepped into the spotlight.

It's one thing not to get along with Bethany, but you didn't even follow the same advice you gave to Ramona about how to deal with people who you are not necessarily friendly with. Perhaps you are mostly surrounded by people who adore you and seek favor, but from someone who is 'down here'(and extremely fly in my own rite), while you are 'up here' you are not coming off as someone that I would admire... do better

I havent seen this weeks show yet, but I think you are terrific with so much class! I just love your style. You seem very secure within yourself. I used to love Bethenny but she seems very full of herself this season. Don't sink to her level! You are better than that. Keep on being Kelly. You're a class act! You go, Girl!

Kelly,

I have no idea what your problem is/was but your attitude toward the charity Jill was putting together was ridiculous, you aren't all that and I couldn't see why you couldn't be a chairperson. Who do you think you are, I find you to be very rude and just full of yourself. Then the confrontation you took with Bethenny, you were completely wrong. I have no idea why you think you are so superior but honey you are no one.

Sweetie, you are in your own little world. Right from the get-go I could tell that you're extremely ditsy, fake, and downright uncomfortable with yourself. You act (and fight) like a teenager, and it was pathetic to see you trying to go up against Bethenny. The woman is made of steel, and she seems even stronger when put up against the likes of you. You are obviously very insecure with yourself and yet build yourself up like you're a queen. Learn to respect other people. The "Madonna" comment Bethenny made was rude, I'll admit, but also hilarious and true. Have a backbone and deal with it like an adult! P.S. Your sugary-sweet approach isn't fooling anyone.

And by the way...everytime you retell the story about your "blowout" with Bethenny your story changes. Something's not right with you....

You are dellusional. You perceive things differently than how they actually happen. You come off as being fake. Most of the things you said in the argument with Bethany didnt make sense. Luckily everything is caught on camera and it doesn't lie.

Your comments on your discussion with Bethany are completely opposite of what was shown on the show. You appeared like a pretentious witch who preaches one thing and does another. You invited her to that discussion and you, Kelly, spoke like an immature child during the entire discussion. You were rude, insulting, incoherent, and self-absorbed during the entire discussion. "We are not friends and I don't like you. I am up here and you are down here" - are not mature, productive statements. It was clear that you were hurt by what Bethany said at the charity meeting and you were going to make sure you hurt her back, instead of discussing it calmly and rationally. Instead you chose to make sure you rattled out your frustration through insults so you could get rid of Bethany so you would not be late with the other person you were meeting with.

1. If you invite someone to anything you do not show up late and if you are late, you call and explain why you are late. Period.

2. The only time you appear above Bethany is by physical height.

3. I would guess that you can't even spell protocol besides being able to define it.

4. It was not proper to describe a young girl with a disease as "cute".

You owe Bethany an apology and you also owe Jill and her daughter an apology.

Kelly, I'm sorry but it did not appear that you took the "high road" in your meeting with Betheny. You seemed to be the aggressor. It was really rude to ask someone for a meeting, show up late then berate her. You may want to revisit your comment about not being agressive that you made on film. You did in fact come across quite agressive and rude.

In watching the episode, I thought that Kelly was a completely drama queen wackadoo! The way it played out to the public watching, might not have been the exact way it went down, but the public viewers only have that to go on. So based on that, I'm totally on Team Bethenny! The way Kelly approached her at the table, Bethenny's only response could be defensive, no choice. It seriously looked as if Kelly was on something. All the blah, blah blah that came out of Kelly's mouth...none of it made sense. She was talking in cirlces like a dog chasing its tail! She is so erratic! Good for Bethenny to stand up to her, maybe Kelly is not use to someone challenging her and calling her out on her mama drama. The truth hurts and I think it put Kelly in a whirlwind, she didn't know how to handle it. And when she did, it really blew up in her face, because she made herself look like a complete wackadoo! She seems very insecure, especially throwing herself on "Max Max"...what's that all about?! Bethenny is clearly the grown up here and kudos to her for handling herself with grace and respect. And Mrs. Countess, you don't need honey to get Bethenny on your side, you need common sense, respect and integrity, and for the love of god, a sense of humor! Bethenny and Jill seem to be the only ones with a sense of humor. I can do without Kelly on the show, she doesn't bring much to the table except annoyance. All of it is beneath Bethenny and I hope she had a Skinny Girl Cocktail and laughed it all off!

I find it really interesting that in tonight's show, you seemed to distort the conversation with Bethanny differently every time you told the story - "OMG she went off on me about flirting with her boyfriend", "OMG she was complaining about how late i was" (and you were late - no excuses) But yet Bethanny related the conversation pretty much as it happened. And you always seem to blame your tardiness on "I had to pick up my kids". Well we all have to pick up our kids and since its something you have to do every day, maybe you should plan better.

Your post makes you seem delusional, everything you just said was not how it happened on the show...she clearly wasn't waiting on you by the door...You come across as arrogant nd pompous. Bethenny actually made you look really stupid even though it seemed like it was your intention to make her feel bad..I know you are up there, but you should really take the same amount of time you take to work on your physical appearance to work on your personality..

I think it's sad that you are a "writer" and don't know the difference between infer and imply.

Kelly you are insane and superficial. I'm not a fan of anybody in the show but you are the worse.

Kelly..."It wasn't appropriate to fight publicly." Talking about Ramona and Simon, and for someone who finds it odd to be confrontational in public, you sure did a great job calling Bethany out. To tell you the truth I don't care who you are it's rude to be late especially when you make the date with someone. By you being late to the charity committe you made it all about you. It makes you look selfish. Personally it make me feel bad that you would have to state how much higher you are than someone to make your self feel good. It was very innapropriate of you, and instead of making a point you just made yourself look like a child. Do you think you were right?

Kelly, you have absolutely no class. You are shallow and self-righteous and egotistical. You have no concept of what is appropriate and the acceptable route to dissolve conflicts and you essentially look like a fool on television. You are not as important as you think and by telling Bethenny that she was the lowest on the totem pole just proved the ugliness of your personality. As for your "important" writing career, your interview with Jill Stuart was an absolute joke and your vocabulary, articulation, and diction are laughable. I can only hope that seeing yourself on television will help you to take steps to finding more depth, class, and compassion in your life.

You totally went in on all fours and attacked Bethenny like an animal. You were not making any sense when you were talking to her. You are totally rude and you are always late when you are meeting people. As far as I am concerned Bethenny has more class than you do. You may think you are all that but your not and another thing I had never heard of you until this show. Yes, I do read and look at all the fashion magazines. You definitely need to learn how to approach subjects without being so abrupt because it really makes you look unattractive.

I started to read your blog but I was two words in and I got bored.

From tonight's episode it seems like the only still in high school is you... you're like the wannabe outcast who's constantly going, "Look at me, guys! Hey, over here, look at me!"

P.S- I'm sure you'll say you're too mature and awesome to pay attention to this comment to... and then you'll obsess over it for a year anyway.

I'm still confused as to why they added you to the show. I feel as though you brought a lot of unnecessary tension to the mix. It almost seems as if you didn't want to be apart of it anyway, so why did you agree to do it? Private people do not do reality shows.

Kelly, Bethenny has you down to a tee. You don't even realize how self-absorbed you are. I think the show is revealing who you truly are. By the way, you were the one waiting in the doorway, not Bethenny! And another thing... there is nothing more rude than being perpetually late. It's so unprofessional, and your children will learn that from you. It's a good way to lose your friends and your job.

I think you are very shallow. Bethany hit it right on the nose when she called you out fpor what you are a stuck up phony. She handled herself quite well because if it were someone like me you did that to let's just say I would have dished out more to you. Try to realize that you are human just like everyone else and get off your throne before you get evicted from it.

Kelly you came off as a hyper nut. You did not explain or listen which would have been polite. I think the one going the high road was Bethanny, she was calm and not so frenetic. I think your comments on how to be appropriate should really be heard by you, you were inappropriate in being late, and inappropriate in how you spoke to Bethany.

Mari

Who is Kelly? Madonna!!!!Exactly!!!!!

Wow, Kelly, you have your own little interpretation of events that directly conflicts with the footage just shown on tv. I realize that editing can be misleading, but the editors can't make up footage- every quote shown was really said. You said that Bethenny was both aggressive and childish, but I think that you were far more aggressive with her than her snide comment. You also portray yourself in a very childish way, giggling over boys, skipping around twirling your skirts, and inviting someone for a drink so you can tell them how much more popular you are. I think you said Bethenny was acting like it was junior high, but you were the one acting like it was elementary school while Bethenny's humor and attitude are at an adult level (maybe that's why you have a hard time understanding her). She said in her interview that if you had approached it differently, she would have appologized for hurting your feelings. How dare you call her out for attacking you in public when it was really just a little comment, then actually attack HER in public as you did at the bar! And by the way, I can tell by the Countess' demeanor that she did was not thinking, "who cares?" about Bethenny but rather thought you were rude to be late and talk to Bethenny like that. She was simply polite enough not to confront you on your own manners. Take some lessons on tact from her.

I realise that the show only gives a snip of your life, but I find it disterbing that you think that you are above anyone else in life station. I found your comments very elitist and rude. You are obviously a very beautiful and accomplished person, but you may want to think about how you come across to people.

The High Road! What a laugh! Kelly, the blow up you had in the bar with Bethenney was one of the most childish things I have ever seen. You seriously need to wake up and realize that the world does not revolve around you. Who are you again?? It's really nice the way you flipped everything around in your little blog and made it seem like Bethenney was in the wrong. You crack me up!

A from Pennsylvania

You are a delusional, your "brief" interpretation of what went down at your meeting with Bethenny, is hidious. You attacked her the minute you sat down and spoke like you were one of the mean girls from that high school movie. "I don't like you" "We'll never be friends" and "I'm up here and you're down there". Why did you want to meet up again?...I can't believe people give YOU the time of day, unbelievable. You need to check yourself and correct yourself.

It is amazing that you can call people's behavior rude. You believe your time is more valuable than anyone else's and demonstrate this by your horrible lateness. It is disrespectful and especially distracting when people are working diligently to plan for a charity.

By trying to rally people around your dislike of Bethany you show what an insecure person you are. You can name whatever names you like, who you know doesn't change the fact that your behavior is small and unacceptable.

I have just started watching this season and have been wondering exactly why you are even on the show... and tonight I have gotten my answer. I was appalled at your behavior towrds Bethany.. for someone who thinks its inapropriate to have a public confrontation, you went tit for tat, and for someone calling someone else "Sophmoric"... you prooved yourself to be such. Then to relay your story to everyone who would listen and fail to leave out that you have placed yourself above Bethany telling her she was lower than you.. yes, now I know why you are here, you want in their click and Bethany is in your way. I can't wait to see what happens next, your Drama is so much more interesting than the sophmores in High school.

Kelly is nothing but a bully who thinks way too much of herself. Someone really needs to set her straight. The way she treats Bethany and others that she doesn't even know is outrageous.

Kelly, You really need to get over yourself! I am so sick of people like you who think they are so much better than everyone else! You say to one person that life is to short to deal with people like that (Bethenny) yet you go around talking and talking about it why dont you start listining to yourself and get over it and get over yourself. TEAM BETHENNY!!!!!!

O.K - We get it - You are soooo busy. So why did you decide to join the show? It also seems like you are having a hard time on the show - i.e You say one thing and do another. Don't just say you are a better person - BE a Better Person :>) You might want to leave the show becaucse it is really making you look BAD. Good Luck!

I think you are rude. YOu have no right to give someone advice on how to handle people, when you have no class at all. I now believe all of the things Bethenney has said about you in previous shows. Who do you think you are to ask someone to meet you, just so that you can tell them that you dont like them and show up late at the same time. Please get over yourself!!!! Bethenney has much more class than you will ever have. I am so tired of you name dropping- those people mean nothing to me and most of the other viewers.

Kelly! It's a little odd to hear the advise you shared so graciously with Ramona, but maybe had you taken your own advise the night you asked Bethenny out you probably would have presented your self in a more respectful way instead of some high school girl who felt that her feelings was hurt and she finally built up the GUTTS, to confront her enemies. But to me I personally see you as being very rude and with out manners and Bethenny had every right to put you on blast especially after the way you conducted your self at Jill's charity meeting......Oh! and if any body ask I'm all for team( B).

Kelly is the most self indulgent, immature adult I have seen grace Bravo in a while if not ever. Her encounter with Bethanny was not only humiliating on her part but it was hard to watch. You do not ask someone to meet with you and show up late with total disregard of that persons time, and then attack them and their character. I thought she handled herself so poorly I wanted nothing more then for her to shut her big fat mouth. I have not had disgust for a housewife on any of the shows like I do Kelly. I think she thinks she is better then every one, more important and she is nothing if unintelligent and immature. Bethanny is not only quick as a whip but she is smart and graceful and I think Kelly should be embarrassed of what comes out of her mouth and should think twice about what kind of person she really is!

Kelly,

Your confrontation with Betheney was really pathetic. And your recap of events shows a complete break with reality (strange, for a reality show). You didn't want to confront Betheney in public so you met at a bar? You left first but she was waiting for you at the door? What? You need to get a grip. Clearly, Betheney didn't give you what you wanted. She didn't fall down groveling for your friendship. Sad. Before you write your blog, you might want to watch the show, at least then you might get your facts correct, something very important for a journalist.

You as a person are not a nice person. Personally from watching this weeks episode I have realized that you think that you are almost on the same level as God. It kinda bothers me that no one really honestly knows who you are. Seriously who do you think that you are to tell someone that you are better than anyone else. It really agitates me that if you are so much better than someone that why on earth would you honestly tell someone one the things that you said as well as tell Bethenny she is childish when you yourself were more immature. I and others think that you are horrible on the show. How inconsiderate of you to go to support a charity and tell people that you can not put your name on something. Its not like that many people know who you are. There are lots of people who are famous that actually put thier name on things (i.e. Jennifer Aniston, Donald Trump, Brad Pitt) and it helps support the event. How much would it have hurt for you to put your name on something when no one really knows who you are. I mean How high, mighty, and SELF-CENTERED are you. I seriously would quit watching the show because you think that you are better than people when you are no better than an ordinary person.