Cast Blog: #RHONY

Fool Me Twice

Jill explains why she didn't invite Ramona and what "love scene" she thought was actually romantic.

I've had an amazingly busy week since we last talked. I had a great time in the Hamptons last weekend where I hosted my friends from the Oprah show. I was so glad I was able to show them a nice time. I hope they enjoyed it. I was also able to play a little tennis with LuAnn and the girls, which is always fun. Allyson returned from an amazing trip to South Africa. I was so glad to have her home safe and sound. From there I went to Vegas with Bobby, Allyson, and Lisa, where we attended a licensing trade show. It was very informative and fun at the same time! The only down side to the trip was the leaving of Allyson's laptop on the plane. I'm appealing to anyone in the Las Vegas area who may work or know somebody who works at the airport to please keep an eye out. I know it's probably long gone, but it doesn't hurt to keep trying.

Since writing Secrets Of A Jewish mother I have received hundreds and hundreds of questions asking for advice about all kinds of subjects such as parenting and marriage. If you have a question for my mom Gloria, Lisa, or myself, please email me at Jill@jillzarin.com and one of us will answer. You can purchase Secrets at BarnesandNoble.com and most other booksellers. If you would like to buy an autographed copy, please visit Zarinfabrics.com. Please let us know who to personalize it to in the comments section of the order. Secrets was just published in Japanese, and the Russian and Chinese editions are coming soon. How proud we are of being published in three foreign languages!

I can't tell you how exciting it was to see Skweez Couture on the episode! That day my partner was in town and we were showcasing Skweez Couture for the first time. I thought it would be a great idea to have the girls do a focus group because as I said in the episode, "Skweez is made for women by a woman." Who would have better input? Skweez was in its early stages when we filmed that scene. I can't wait until you see how far it's come since then. If you thought it looked great, now it looks fabulous. My mission statement is "Beauty begins with a great foundation." What you wear under your clothes will set your mood. Look for it this fall, more details coming soon. Please visit the newly launched skweezcouture.com.

I was surprised that Alex brought up Sonja's financial issues in the Skweez Couture showroom. When I walked in, the discussion was well underway. I was worried that it wasn't coming out clearly so I was trying to help Sonja explain it. I know it may not have seemed that way. I only care what Sonja thinks and she knows I was coming from a good place and only offered to help her anytime she needed it.

I love how Ramona continues to be insulted when she isn't invited to something, but in her life excludes people all the time with no explanation. Alex is delusional regarding what Ramona does for a living. Prior to Housewives she would refer to herself as the "closeout queen." She would buy distressed inventory from manufacturers and resell them to discounters and closeout stores as she showed in an earlier season. Alex is under the impression that Ramona was some kind of designer. Ramona can sell and certainly negotiate money. None of that has anything to do with why she wasn't invited. I lost a Kodak deal worth seven figures because of what Ramona said on the show. They told me such -- and in no uncertain words. As the old saying goes "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me."

My partner knew our history and insisted she not come near anything for fear she would bad mouth it with no basis. Ramona is just too unpredictable. Maybe I should have told her in advance, but she would have either bullied me into inviting her or been pissed I didn't want to, so I didn't say anything. OK, I'm a wimp! Besides, it was Ramona who said in Season 1, "you can't invite everyone to everything."

When you didn't see any dinner but only coffee at Alex and LuAnn's meeting you knew it was going to be brief. I noticed there is a reoccurring theme with Alex. Much like when I had the talk with her, she seemed to be reiterating that LuAnn didn't listen to her. Alex seems to have a problem with thinking that she is not listened to. I think the reason for this is because Alex isn't coming to people with her own issues. She's fighting other people's battles instead. If people have a problem with someone sometimes it's best just to stay out of it and let people settle their own differences. I think LuAnn made it very clear what happens to the messenger. The ladies are standing up for themselves and not letting the backstabbing and mean words go by anymore. I've been called out on things plenty of times and I've handled it. Can she?Parts of the episode, I still maintain were like soft porn. I consider myself an aficionado on romance and could write a book with suggestions on how to seduce your man -- but some things are just better left to your imagination. I thought LuAnn and Jacques' reunion was the most romantic of the three scenes because it felt truly authentic. Nothing feels the same as a new love. OK I admit it, I am a bit of a prude when it comes to showing too much on TV. Also, I always think to myself, "What would Allyson say"? I was actually so disturbed by the soft porn nature of it that I warned my fans ahead of time in case they watched the show with under-age children. Yes, we got the memo that you love each other to death. . .can we move on now?

I'd like to wish all of the Dad's and special men a very Happy Father's Day this Sunday. If you would like to win one of Bobby's ties and an autograph picture of the two of us, please visit jillzarin.com for details on my Father's Day Contest! The deadline for entries is Sunday night. You must be signed up to receive my newsletter to enter.

Love,

Jill

Dorinda: Let Ramona be Ramona

Dorinda opens up on her relationship with John and tells us what she thought of being in the middle of brunchgate. 

This episode was draining. So much happening, too, it’s exhausting.

I know everyone was thinking it was literally a battle of two brunches. Let me clear with this: It was a classic power struggle with two grown women with big personalities staking their territory. Listen, there was a bit of the tension before everyone met up at Luann’s, and it all came to a head. I personally had no skin in this game, but for some reason, I was clearly positioned as a talking point and negotiating tool. Whatever…it’s all good.

Brunch was awkward, to say the least. I was hoping all the girls would show up, so we would have a chance to really get to know one another before I left for the city, but the fact that they didn't neither ruined nor altered my plans. Thank you, Ramona, for a wonderful weekend, and thank you for the "lunch in my honor” (I think), but I had a life to get back to…

That said, the weekend was great. I got to meet all the girls, spend time with them, and I managed to leave without any battle wounds! Cheers to me! (Just give me some extra Worcestershire sauce right away…)

OK, OK, OK…hold the phone. Literally. My lunch with John at Gina’s is a moment that illustrates something I feel really passionate about. Was I angry? No. Annoyed? You can’t possibly imagine. I am quite relaxed about a lot of things but a total stickler about others. And bad manners is a real trigger.

I am always excited to take some time out and meet John up for a lunch or a drink, if our paths can cross between meetings and errands. It’s true, we don't live together, and we don’t see each other every day, but because of that, I want to make the most of our time together. I love him, and he makes me happy. Many factors in our lives—work, family, friends, friends, exhaustion and, in my case, Hannah—keep our lives pretty damn separate. I don't see him every day, so to steal away an hour or two on a weekday for lunch is both fun and kind of exciting.

Guys, when you’re out with a date, whether it’s a girlfriend of two years or a wife of 20 years, PLEASE be present! This means NO PHONE (I repeat: NOOOOO PHOOOOOOOONE), unless it is an emergency or your deal is going to collapse if you don’t take the bitch’s call, OK? Let’s face it, we aren't doctors working in an ER or in a maternity ward delivery babies. We deserve some quiet and some focused time together. Come on, guys. Be gentlemen. Leave the wheeling and dealing for the cab ride back to the office. If this isn't doable, then lunch isn’t doable. Quick little snippets of small talk between telephone distractions—calls or texts or otherwise—do NOT a happy lunch make. If that’s what’s going down during my lunch, then you’re going down, too. To be honest, I’d rather take an hour to browse Bergdorf’s and get a falafel on the way home. Thank you.

The food was great though (#shrimpsalad). You're welcome.

Bethenny invited me to see the new apartment on Twitter on Tuesday night, and I’m so excited. Looks like a really great pad. B knows what she wants, how she wants it, and when she wants it. I admire that tremendously. I need her to come up to the Berkshires with me and help me shake things up. I think her new SoHo apartment is even nicer than the TriBeCa apartment from the pictures I’ve seen. I’m can’t wait to go visit.

Oh, Ramona… Finding herself, distracting herself, dating to just have fun and get out there. I totally approve and think it’s great for her. She’s a gorgeous woman and needs to be seen and be told that. Often! People need to worry about what’s going on in their own backyard before snooping around Ramona’s front porch. Let Ramona be Ramona, and get on with it. This end-of-an-marriage thing is a process, and even though she has made the decision to move forward with the divorce, it can and may be a long process that will have its ups and downs. Hey, listen up: NYC lawyers are going to be involved, and there is no money in a quick divorce. Buckle your seatbelt, get a lot of rest, because this is just the beginning.

And now…the singles night at Beautique.

The Beautique restaurant is great for business dinners, first dates, and for a chic couple’s night out. It’s definitely a place to see and be seen. The back room, however, the Beautique Club, is a playground for singles and the glamorous singles. I knew John was going that night for a business dinner, but I have to admit, I had no idea he was going to slip through the dark kitchen corridor and down the rabbit hole to the back room club. As I watched, I was not happy about it, and I remembered how annoyed and surprised I felt when Ramona called me and told me. But, I trust John, and I believe it was innocent. After all, we’ve been together for two years, and I know John. John loves people and loves to be out and about. I get it. I just wish he would try to keep it try gender-neutral and not always have a female colleague that I don’t recognize with him. Too much to ask? I think not.

If it feels shady or wrong, and you might give people the opportunity to talk negatively about it, just don't do it. 

Dorinda Medley

My philosophy is simple: If it feels shady or wrong, and you might give people the opportunity to talk negatively about it, just don't do it. Fair, right? I wish he understood this better. In fact, I wish a lot of people understood this better. People love to talk and loooooooooooove to stir the pot. Why give them a pot to stir in the first place? Remember: If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s a duck. I know John is no duck, but not everyone else does.

I will say this, though: The girls came out in full force for me. Especially Lady Morgan. I really, really, REALLY appreciate that. Loyal girlfriends rock! I love my girls.

Anyway, I need a nap, because I’m already anxious about what’s coming up next week.

Have a great weekend! MUAH!

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