Today is F. Scott Fitzgerald’s birthday. He had a lot of friends and trust me, they all drove drunk. He was a wiz, too, with metaphor so I think I’ll borrow his words.
“[Real Housewife] quarrels are bitter things. They’re not like aches or wounds, they’re more like splits in the skin that won’t heal because there’s not enough material.”
I know what he’s talking about -- I don’t have enough material for this blog. Do you get the feeling you’ve read it all before? Same stuff, different scene. I’ve got George buying potency wood, Sonja too upset to hang her coat, Heather strutting her Yummie with skill, Robin Pocker of the Pocker pictures pocketing paintings with her crew, Aviva giving spelling lessons and. . .well, whatever. That penthouse is really high up.
This will be short and “Areyoukiddingme” will be happy. She likes a short blog. She mentioned it, by comment, circa Episode 13. She said “Good God, Carole,” and you defended me. Thank you, defenders. #letsstay2gether
Sonja, The Ex and Dorian Grey
Sonja is so upset after the non-meeting with her J. P. Morgan that she can’t bear to hang her coat. Her friends are in Palm Beach, or Lifer Key, or else lunching and Sonja can’t even keep her house. She has bills to pay and a toaster oven to make, and Mr. Morgan is not at all interested in her décolletage.
Sonja doesn’t know where it went wrong. She was everything in the kitchen; everything in the bedroom. Hmmm. . .I see the problem now. I wish they’d come to me. You can’t cook for heads of state in a toaster oven, it’s limiting, as are dogs and friends and interns in your bed. I didn’t try those sorts of things when I was married, but as a rule, I don’t think they work.
Sonja has turned a corner on friends and husbands. She’s taking down the portraits that the Queen Mother’s painter painted. Oh boy. Nothing sincere can come after that statement. Here it comes: The Morgans are American royalty. Yes, royalty who charge us $3 to use their ATMs. There’s an Aristocrat for you. (Cheap!) No wonder he hasn’t kept to his pre-conception agreement.
Carol, in my eyes, you are the perfect example of what a princess should be. If others don't agree, so be it please hear me out. You are calm, you try to make peace in between all of the drama, and from what I see you don't feel that just because you have money you have to be overly extravagant. Just please try to tell Aviva that words like "white trash" hurt people that are less fortunate and basically it is a put down to people like myself. Yes, I am poor, but I am 1,000% more compassionate than Aviva! Please don't lower yourself to look like her because I have lost all respect for her. I understand she was stressed from the plane ride, but doesn't she understand that she is fortunate to even be able to go to St. Bart, or even fly on a plane as far as that goes! I have never even had enough money to have the opportunity to fly. Fear or not, embrace what you have, and be thankful. I hope these ladies learn to calm down and think about what they say before they say it, be just a little more compassionate like you and let bygones be bygones! What was said was said so DROP it! Also, I love the eye roll you give when the same old story starts up over and over again!
You are such a breath of fresh air! You, Heather and Aviva are my favs!! Luann too but she her story line is getting a bit boring! Sorry girl! I just love you. I think you are so interesting and entertaining in a very respectful manner. Thank you for that. Thank you for telling the truth, pointing out the BS and sticking to your guns. I wish you were my friend or Mom for that matter. You just seem to be strong and amazing! I wish you the best and will continue to support you!
Carole, I can read your stories all day long ! You have a knack kiddo ! You and Heather are my favorites . Please don't let this show change you. Stick together !! :)
wow are you ever the popular girl! part of it is your amazing writing skills IMO. i've commented on everyone's blogs now except yours and luann's and yours has BY FAR the most comments! that surprised me since you don't get involved in the drama so much as the others...anyway i think you're quirky, brilliant, sophisticated and super cool. i relate to your commitment-phobic ways as i too lost my husband...mine was to the awful 3 strikes law and he got sent away for 37 years 10 years ago and it feels like FOREVER...it's almost worse than him being dead, as i can't be with him and share my life anymore but he's still alive, just in prison. california has prop 36 and i hope people vote to pass it this nov as it will free a lot of other non-violent offenders who got caught up in its net. the problem i have with you is you are way too wishy washy and should have taken aviva up on her threat that if you don't kick out ramona and sonja immediately, SHE'S LEAVING! well, you made a bad situation MUCH WORSE by enabling her diva behavior and not calling her bluff and look how much hurt and pain she brought onto the whole household! if you're gonna play hostess, get some backbone damnit and protect your guests from abuse like the verbal diarrhea (YES verbal abuse can cause that malady by the stress it puts on one's whole system...i get it when my italian husband goes into one of his tirades)...TMI...sorry...your bf is super hot...don't be afraid to love again, for that is the greatest gift we can find and so rare. god bless.
You are the peace maker. I really enjoyed you but Aviva is crazy for real. Watchout the rath will come your way when sbe's done with Sonja and Romona. She should be mad at her father, not the girls.
Howsabout "she was something...and often everything." I could totally hang with you but I prefer Oregon Pinot Noir. Hard liquor makes me gain weight. You navigted this journey with these nutcases with aplomb. I hope you return to the show.
You are cute and awesome, funny and intelligent, compassionate and sensitive, I love you as a new addition to the show and love your friendship with Heather. Having said that, Aviva is wrong in every aspect. She is nasty and vile and you would do well to disassociate yourself from her (go look at her blog, only 7 comments and 100% negative towards her). Personally, I think this is all about when Ramona and Sonya didn't drop everything and come to her charity event. It was a very worthy cause and if they could have, they should have came, but who is Aviva to determine how they spend their time? Ever since that episode she has been cruel, vile, vicious and unbecoming in her treatment of Ramonya.
Ramona and Sonya are who they are and they don't pretend to be anything else. They are true to themselves and there are no airs with them. Aviva, I liked her until she went ballistic is a spoiled brat who expects to have her way at all costs. What she did at the fashion show was abominable. What is her actual beef? They should have bent over backwards to Reid for bringing her? They partied? So what? She doesn't have a leg to stand on (no pun intended). And while we all may sympathetic to the loss of her limb that does not give her carte blanche to call anyone white trash. That is the lowest comment I have ever heard on any of the HW franchises.
Of course it was followed up by her inappropriate father who engaged in his own filthy talk. When he came to the event he had only one side of the story. His daughter"s! And now she's mad because Ramona kindly asked him to leave? Which he didn't. So she had hid escorted out and rightly so. Aviva is a loser, so lose her. Ultimately, she will bring you down. She is even more classless than the Countless LuAnn, and that's saying a lot.
Carole, I was disappointed in you and Heather greeting George with open arms at your tournament and told him Ramona was wrong for kicking him out. He physically grabbed her arm!!! You are a class act and I have so enjoyed your fresh, positive attitude but I saw a different side of you. Do you play to the side of money or what?? George and Aviva were WRONG. Ramona is a nut case for sure but Dh090476she used class and had him escorted out instead of kicking hom in the bullocks like I would have done.
You are an awesome new addition to this show! I was excited to see that there would be new castmates this season. I liked you from the beginning. I would like to be able to say, "You fit right in!" But that would be somewhat insulting to you, and I have nothing at all negative to say about you. I think you must be some kind of Saint to deal with all the craziness the way you did. Maybe the other ladies, instead of singing or talking about having "class", should instead watch you and take some notes. Your story line is interesting, YOU are interesting. You are the most "REAL" person on all of the Housewife shows! I hope that you will come back next season, though I TRULY hope Aviva does not. I am grateful for my DVR because the only way I can watch the show anymore is to fast forward through any clips involving Aviva. I'm so sick of her and she is ruining the show! Ramona is a handfull, no question, but at least she's interesting. She brings something to the show...always has. I like all of the crazy cast, except for Aviva. Can't you all vote, like on Survivor, and vote her off the show? I'm really concerned that the ratings will go down as long as she's on there. I want to read your book! I'm sure it will be very interesting! Don't let these people change you. You are perfect the way you are. Thanks for making this season tolerable!
Carol, I like you and hope you stay. I believe you will be fun in the show...as long as you do not go against Ramona and Sonja. Drunk, crazy..whatever..i love those two. They have fun, and I believe you would fit in well with them. Aviva and her father are absolutely wrong in most of their behavior, everyone can see that. George, DEMANDING that Ramona apologize to his daughter was just crazy. Why do those two feel they run the world ? Apparently Vassar didn't teach etiquette and manners, and george is absolutely offensive. Anyway, I do hope you'll be on next season
OMGeeeeee! You just gave me such a belly laugh with this blog, that I woke up my poor Poochie, who thought I was crying...hahaha! I lost it with your "driving me to diarrhea" comment, as I did with your voluntary rehab stint. I'm telling you right now, I'm using the rehab thing....wayyyy too funny. You're so talented! No wonder Darren Star has scooped you up. I cannot wait for the series. For the woman who complained about your blog being too long......."how do you like her now?" Oh yeah, you don't have an insanely successful production company....oooopsy.
I can't wrap my head around GROWN women telling each other to apologize. I really liked you until that moment. Oh well.....
Carole, I don't care what anyone says, I love your blog no matter how many pages you write. I laugh a deep belly laugh when I read it. Thanks, I needed that!! Love you, Carole, I hope you return next year....you are a breath of fresh air and I like you....I REALLY LIKE YOU!!!
You are fabulous! LOVED your book. I'm older so the Radziwill's and Kennedy's helped to frame my generation's history. On another note where did you buy the gorgeous dress you wore to your book party? It is stunning! You have such an interesting fashion point of view that is original and your only special brand of cool. You're great fun to watch!
lucytoo Did you ever find out abut the dress? I also to know where she got that dress and the beautiful mint silk ombre dress she wore the night of the fight in St Barts.
What a breath of fresh air you have brought to the show this season.... I've enjoyed all the new cast mates, but you are definitely my favorite. Wit, charm, beauty, fashion sense, class, talent, brains, etc., etc. You have been the class act this season and in my opinion the classiest of all Housewives. You are the calm in the narcissistic storm that is constantly brewing around you and your wit and humor bring a light hearted dose of intermission to the continuous, self imposed drama on the show. Best wishes on your latest published work and I hope it makes it to the big screen! I hope to see you back next season!
If you say that now about Aviva's father, then why didn't you stick up for Ramona when asked about it? I clearly get you don't like to be in the middle of confrontations, but even you (a level headed smart woman) have to admit that Aviva is a bully. That's the problem with the world today, no one sticks up for someone who is being bullied.
I've been watching past episodes today, and I have a question: Why does it bother you so much whether other people try to "one-up" you or not? What's the big deal? I've been told by some people that this is simply their way of "identifying" with others in an attempt to make a stronger bond. Sometimes people's motives aren't always negative. Your life would be so much easier if you let those things go… It's simply a sign that the other person feels a need to bring more to the table in order to qualify…not to prove that they are better than you. You might be surprised if you asked someone "why" they do that when it happens again. One of my favorite quotes is: "We know what we do. Often, we know why we do what we do. But what we don't always know is what we do DOES (to others)."
Have to agree. I actually like you and Heather the best. The sanity is within a normal range. LOL The others make me want to drive into the city and smack them. I just can't imagine why they themselves don't re-watch the shows and try to move towards the "light of sanity". :)
Carole, I wasn't going to watch this season, but I'm glad I did. I am delighted to watch you, Heather and Aviva. I am glad to see the intelligent and driven women, who, because they have lived challenging lives, don't understand and have little patience for made-up drama. The three of you add weight to the show, and for that I am grateful.
What a fantastic blog!!! I think you should blog about all the Housewives series. I'm buying your book because of your blog! I want more!!!
Thanks for putting yourself out there, Carole...
YOU ROCK CAROLE. I'm looking forward to reading your books. You're an amazing writer: so witty, articulate, and interesting. Next season, please speak up and don't let any one of those loudmouths talk over you again. The world needs more Caroles in it. You're AMAZING!!
I do not understand how you are on this show. Carole, you are absolutely lovely, but all of the women have some " train wreck" quality. I can't see that quality in you. You are the most likeable, relatable, delightful person on the show.
Sonja: "Jeez, look at Carole's ass, no wonder Clooney did her for a year!"
I don't think Sonja is giving Clooney much credit because a lot of gals have a great ass, take for instance the popping ass clench Ramona did at the doctor's office. But (pun intended), the combination of a stellar booty along with wit, intelligence, empathy and authenticity makes you adorable and irresistible! Your supremely written blog recaps and your hysterical "interview" comments on the show should garner you a fourth Emmy! The only glitch - it is Patron, not Petron. However, entirely excusable if you drank a fifth. Just don't plead the fifth in rehab. I think even Dr. Drew would want to hear what you have to say. I've read your first book and will buy the Widow's Guide as soon as it is released.
If you write it, I will read it.
If you're in it, I will watch it.
I am Sam, Sam I am.
You are the best 'Real Housewife' the franchise has ever signed which is exactly why you are way too decent for this trashy show and being on it probably feels like inhumane punishment for you. As Jeff Lewis would say, "It's a little cruel, but I just love it!"
I just find it so hard to believe that, after watching these episodes, you aren't as disgusted by Aviva's behavior as most of the viewers are. You seem like such a level headed person but maybe it is just easier to go with the flow then to really speak your mind about her. Ramona and Sonja definitely have their faults but Aviva spews hatred like nobody else I've ever seen.
I think Carole is exercising restraint. She got a lot of practice this season. Carole is an observer and she has certainly observed Aviva's "dog with a bone" preoccupation. She just oes not want to belabor it.
Laurielu Carole seems to take the path of least resistance, which enables people like Aviva. I appreciate Carole's peacemaker attitude, but think she's absolutely wrong to have condoned George and Aviva's actions, and I wish she'd own up to it.
I take umbrage in the manner which you referred to Jamaica, as if it is a dirty third world country. Surprised because I thought you were a liberal. When you asked a gentlemen if he was a Republican it was with such disdain. I guess you are following Obama's lead in trying to be civil,
right! As far as the show it is mildly entertaining.
Carole - you and Heather are the only ones with class - thank God for some respectable women on this show - Romona was always a train wreck, Sonja is just down right pathetic, Aviva downright viscious and condesending, and LuAnn - well she is her song - money can't buy you class. Whew - what an emotional year. Can't wait for the reunions - this should be a hoot!
Carole, your writing is delicious. You've been great fun this year. But, please tell me what happened on the trip that YOU saw that was so different from what WE saw. There's no way you could have seen the Aviva behavior we did and still think it appropriate to even allow her to stay in your place. Was it editing? It just makes no sense, especially based on your sensibilities prior to this. Stunning, really.
Carole, I adore your wit and your ability to not let all the drama on the show ruffle your feathers. You and Heather are the two reasons I watch the show. (I hope you pen a book about your experience doing the show.) I was sure I'd like Aviva at first but have found her comorbid needs for constant praise and constant belittlement of the others --deserved or not-- exhausting; I must say I am really scratching my head wondering why you're not acknowledging her bad behavior as much as you are that of the others. She has an anxiety issue, true, but she's vicious...in every language she speaks.
Carole there is nothing I can say about you other then you are pure Class and really above this show..but I am so glad you are here you bring so my calm to a insane world. I find you so wonderful to watch and i so hope you will come back next year. I loved getting to know you and I can want to see your book on TV.
Read your book and thought you might be more tolerant, and yes, expansive, about "characters" since you seem to have been raised by a hoard of them. But I cant imagine what it must be like to be a "character" on a "reality" show, either, so maybe I should cut you some slack.
You're still my girl crush, Carole. And your book was brutal, frank and beautifully written. Very moving.
I have enjoyed watching you, and always look forward to your little witty comments. I am sure you have already learned that the trick is to never take those gals seriously, and never get between Ramona and the wine bottle. Carry on
I think you are my favorite this season. Sonja is getting a bad rap through all of this and I do think she tries to gloss over the difficulties she is experiencing right now. I don't think she is perfect by any means but give her a break, she is far from malicious. I have never liked Ramona but I find myself sympathizing with her in this craziness. Aviva is selfish and self-centered for all her charitable works and to be honest she comes across a few screws short if you know what I mean... Keep me laughing Carole, I find you very refreshing just don't get too caught up in Aviva's me,me,me....
To put it simply...I ADORE YOU!!! Finally, Bravo has found a normal woman to be a housewife...(though dina from NJ certainly came close ). You are so witty and clearly a very talented writer. When I heard that jill was gone I lost interest in even watching the show, but you made me continue to watch. (Even though only my kids know I actually watch all these shows. And they are sworn to secrecy or they are out of my will) Being a single Mother of 3 who works 2 jobs just to keep the electricity and cable on, I dont know why I even watch spoiled over indulged rich woman act badly, but I guess it makes me feel better about myself LOL. You are amazing how you maneuver these shark infested waters and still maintain decorum and class and a sense of humor. Luann is shady as hell..sonja needs a slap...Ramona...hmm um well Ramona is bat sh#@ crazy and pretty much drunk every day (her poor kid). I love heather though she needs to stop participating in the ramonacoaster convos..they are TEDIOUS. And im beginning to see a different Aviva that aint so pretty. Not to diminish Avivas anxiety but sheesh lady give it a rest. BUT you Carole I could watch all day. If you do leave the show which Im sure you have woken up many a morning and thought WTF??? One of these things doesnt belong here. I hope bravo gives you your own show. Clarity and Class with Carole. It could be about a beautiful widow making her way in NYC and doing it like a normal person who isnt bipolar and has a sense of humor. Maybe I should just call andy and have a chat. Do you have his cell number??? LOL At any rate you are very funny and inspiring. Your upbeat apprach is a joy to watch even in the face of terrible tragedy. I dont know if you were ever blessed to meet the edies (little Edie maybe??) but Im sure they are smiling down on you from heaven. And , by all means, continue to use quintessential. Its fabulous!!!! Just like you ....xo
Thank you Carole for your hilarious take on ridiculous behavior. Is there anything I can do to get you to join our family for Thanksgiving this year. What I would do to read your blog the next day!
carole my darling i'm now regretting my three years of braces as i adore your lovely overbite and every word (and it's subtle inflection) that comes out of your lovely mouth.....i'm only hanging onto this troubling rhony addiction because of you.....don't go changin'.....
Carole, you ARE going to end up at Promises in Malibu if you continue to hang out with this crew. You've survived an incredible amount of heartbreak in your life, and the instability that abounds among these women is gonna' inhabit you too. You're going to need an exorcism, not Group. You are refreshingly real and kind and sensitive. Yes, you throw a few barbs, but who amongst us doesn't? I hate to say this because I'll miss you (or maybe Andy will let you co-host What Happens After) but get out while you can........You're an Emmy Award winning journalist, for heaven's sake! Stop hanging out in the Mean Girl's Cuckoo's Nest. And whatever you do, don't invite any of them on vacation!
When the season first began, I was a bit skeptical about "new" housewives and how everyone would "gel" so to speak, but I must say, you and Heather quickly became my favorites. You seem very genuine and have a great way to keep everything in perspective....unlike the "others" who have a fit if they are not immediately greeted with Pinot and open arms. Your blog was spot on and very humorous!! I find you to be very authentic and real...someone people can relate to.
Carole I just love you lol.
Oh and the longer the blog the better as far as I'm concerned :)
I appreciate your candor about the Morgan financial conglomerate which speaks to the rest of middle America's financial realities...Your blog is hysterical too.....it makes we want to get a fake Fendi!
Your blog reads like an insider's satire that exposes some really superficial behavior. What are your thoughts on Ramona refusing George's donation to the battered women's charity? Who knows that $$$ could have put another family on the road to healing. This speaks to Ms. Singer's true character...that her need to 'have the last word' and be right in is more important than the charity event she was hosting. Bad form Ramona :(
Carole, you are comic relief in this little shop of horrors. Keep bringing it! The other commentators who are defending silly rich women without real world problems should probably take the week off from reality Bravo and read a good book.
I like you Carole... More than anyone on the housewives... Just don't think it's funny to make light of rehab.
Carole, This is the first time I have read your blog. What a delight ; I am now going to go back and read all of your previous entries. Your sense of humor is very refreshing. Bravo did a great job in recruiting you for RHONY. Not a narcissistic bone in your body. How unusual for a Real Housewives cast member