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I was very disappointed in the little that was shown of the conversation between Slade and his mom. His mom specifically came into town to give us advice and help with his current situation. Since his mom has dealt with Grayson's mom in the past and the many issues that were at hand, we figured maybe having another perspective might help us figure out a solution to all this and for the sake of Grayson. What you did not see was that Slade's mom is not a very big fan of Grayson's mother and was not seeing light at the end of the tunnel in reasoning with her. Slade's mom asking him what he does for work was such a small part of the conversation, they talked for close to two hours. His mom truly did not understand anymore what Slade did currently for work because she really isn't around as much anymore. She is enjoying traveling and retirement and all she really knew was Slade working in the title business before. Slade and his mom actually have never talked in detail about what he had been doing the last few years since he left the title business. She truly did not understand what his job was at the time. It seemed like she was ripping on him, and that was not the case at all. She was trying to figure out a plan for his current situation and how to make better and more consistent income. So she was offering advice such as being a lawyer. At the time Slade's contract with his last client had just ended and it was not paying all the bills, so he needed to rethink his current job and was discussing it with his mom.
Unfortunately the press and one person in particular have perpetuated this very difficult and frustrating situation for Slade. The press and people stating that Slade is a deadbeat father is ridiculous. Just because a man can no longer pay $4,000 a month in support due to loss of a job and financial hardship does not make him a deadbeat father. Normally a man who is not present in a child's life, doesn't care, never sees them, neglects the child, or is abusive or demeaning to a child makes a deadbeat father. Let me be clear that financial inability to pay the same amount in child support due to external circumstances in no way makes a man a deadbeat father. If he was such a deadbeat father then why hasn't the mother of his oldest son been in the press talking poorly about Slade as well? And furthermore wouldn't his oldest son, Gavin, who is now 19 years of age and has a voice of his own been a great source of truth regarding this statement. Why isn't he in the press saying that about his dad? I'll tell you why, because it's not true!
It has become apparent this story is being told only through one person's eyes so it can benefit only them, not even taking into consideration how it is affecting Grayson's health, recovery, and relationship with his father. Slade has always chosen not to fight back using the press and stay silent for the sake of not dragging his son into it, but I have seen it hurt him too much now. I have sincerely tried to stay out of it all and not get involved; however I will no longer sit silently and allow this false picture to be painted of Slade as a father.
I see Slade everyday working hard to try and find a good paying job so he can once again meet his obligations and continue to pay for Grayson's medical expenses. He submits resumes consistently to companies and has worked with head hunters, etc. Unfortunately the hard reality is that because of the false press that is out there, the second a employer googles his name an article stating that he is a deadbeat father is what they find. How can one parent possibly get a job, if another parent is in the press creating the very thing that is keeping him from getting that job to help? One cannot have it both ways, parents have to be on the same team or it will only hurt the child.
we love that you and Slade a a true Team..keep on doing what your doing .Slade needs your support now.Wish we lived in LA to attend benefit.Our best to all.
Your an inspiration to many! I too know the effects of the child support issues.It's a shame others have nothing better to do then talk smack on someone else.Thoughts and Prayers for Grayson and you all..XXXX
You're such a breath of fresh air as a human being. You have wisdom that's lacking in many women your age. Well done for standing by Slade when he needs you most. I hope when things improve for him, he will always be there for you. You must love him very much as he loves you. Good on you Gretchen.
Gretchen --- you are absolutely right in everything you said. When a loved one is sick work seems a lot less important. I will keep Grayson and Slade in my prayers, and I think its wonderful idea to host a fundraiser. I admire you, your work ethic and your morals. Also you and Slade are adorable together.
Gretchen, You are most definitely my favorite housewife! Stay true to yourself and what you believe in...you are a great role model and inspiration. Continue to surround yourself with your family & true friends and forget about all the other people who create drama and problems for you. Take care. :)
Gretchen you are precious...and I think your worries about marrying Slade are unfounded in this case. He seems really dedicated to you and truly in love. You both need to keep your heads up and keep working hard. Everything will pay off in the end!
gretchen you are an amazing woman! and def. my favorite. you are so positive and have a heart unlike the rest of those "so called women"
You are my favourite! I know it will work out with you and Slade. Just don't be like Tamera who is bitter and selfish. Don't talk trash about others and stay sweet. Just leave Tamara alone as she has issues and don't talk like her.
Gretchen! After reading this I truly believe you regarding Slade's custody agreement. I feel so bad for his son and would love to contribute to help Grayson out! I hope that people find it in their hearts to help Grayson and quit focusing on Slade!
Gretchen - I just cried my eyes out in sadness for Slade. As the mother of two beautiful lil boys - I could not imagine how I would go on if this had happened to my family. Slade is doing his best to take care of his baby and it sickens me that Tamra and Vicky and the rest can even speak negatively about the situation. If I behaved like those ladies - I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror. They bring so much destruction and negativity with no cares who they hurt - and slowly their lives are falling apart. The old saying - what goes around comes around. I think you and Slade are great together!!! He loves you dearly.
Was never your fan (sorry), but you seem to have a clear vision of your goals & the determination to achieve them. Can't believe I'm saying this either, but it seems Slade has been taken down quite a few notches & is actually a supportive guy now. I'm enjoying watching the dynamics of your relationship - y'all are hilarious. Best of luck - hope Grayson's charity event is a huge success, & I hope Slade finds a great job soon!
Best wishes - Mel
You have proven that you are definitely the classiest of all the other House Wife's. They all seem to be very jealous of you. I think the women have been cruel to Slade, and insensitive to the fact that his child is sick. Where are these women's compassion? The good thing about the way they have acted is that you and Slade have displayed the integrity, and fantastic character that you guys possess. Also, Remember God is a Vindicator!!! Put your trust in Him, and He will fight your battles. God will bring the very ones who persecuted you have to come and ask you for help. He will bring them back to your feet. Just bless them, and continue to show the excellent character that you guys have displayed, and I promise that God be your promoter. This is always the end result when you bless your persecutors, no exceptions. You are beautiful, and Slade is so handsome. You both make a terrific couple. You compliment each other. I believe God will restore you both. I love Alexis, and it appears that she is truly your friend. I love her stand on her Faith. My family are actually very good friends with her pastor. My parents have been friends with Jentzen for over 20 years. If you visited their church with them, I believe you will begin to see How God will resolve all these issues.
I want Slade to be restored financially in front of everyone!!!
It says a lot about your character that you are standing by Slade while he is struggling financially and spending time with his son during his crisis. It also said a lot about your character when you helped Jeff while he was sick and stayed with him. I know someone whose fiance left him when he was diagnosed with cancer because she didn't want her life being dragged down by his illness.
I wish the other wives weren't so dense so they could see what a great woman you are and quit trash talking you.
Stay classy, girl :)
Gretchen, you always wear the most fabulous jewelry!! I loved the blue stone necklace :)
I really hope things turn around for Slade. I think it is awesome that he supports and helps you in your business and you are a great support to him :)
Gretchen, The one thing I've learned from personally dealing with a very sick family member is that it is truly about the sick one. SLade is doing the right thing by making it simply about his son and not using the press to sling mud at anyone. ALso, I want to say that it is in fact normal to be depressed during something like this. Sadly if we were talking about a MOM, no one would call her a dead beat but Slade being a man is being hammered. Slade will find work and will slowly rebuild his life and I believe that will make him a better person. Hang in there and our prayers to Grayson!
Hey Gretchen! You are so beautiful and you have such an awesome personality. You are by far my favorite housewife. You're independant, smart, and so high spirited and I really think that it intimidates the other housewives. I went through a similar experience with the child support issue. My ex husband was married before he met me and had 2 kids. He had a very high paying job and paid a ridiculous amount of child support. When he got divorced, he moved and got a job where he didn't even make close to what he did before but had the same amount of child support. We were told to go back to court to have it adjusted but didnt even have the money to do that. So if we missed a payment, he took a lot from people saying he didn't care about his kids etc. That just wasn't the case. You can't give what's not there. So it was a very hard time and I do believe Slade is a very good father and things will get better for the both of you! Tamra and Vicky rag so much on you that it only leads me to believe they're unhappy in their own lives and very very jealous. They need to get a life and stay out of yours! Love ya!!!
Gretchen - you really shouldn't spend so much time defending Slade in your blogs. The fact that you do should be a wake-up call to you.
It's going to be ok! Best of luck with your charity event, and all the best to Slade in this difficult time in his life.
Hi Gretchen, can you either post information on how we can donate to Grayson here or on your FB page? I'm sure many would like to donate.
I feel for Slade, Grayson and anyone going through such a tough thing.
My heart goes out to Slade for this very difficult time in his life. I will send up prayers for Grayson, and hope that he continues to fight this. On a lighter note, I LOVED when Slade called Jo out for being lazy! People wanted to blame him for her lack of being able to get her career going, but let's face it, there was only so much he could do. Best wishes to you on your new business endeavors.
Gretchen, is was so refreshing to side another side of Slade. I too am unemployed due to this recession that hit all of us very hard. After watching the scene with Slade and his mother you see how the how the high flying life changes all of us. Money isn't everything, it can't buy you happiness, I think a lesson Slade has learned quite well this season. He appears to be humbled and is facing one of the greatest challenges in his life with a very ill son. My best to Slade and his family. Good Luck with the success of your business.
Glad your line is doing so well, and so impressed on trying to make a life where you support yourself. Some of the other women (Tamara) seem satisfied to find a rich boyfriend to support them. She talks about her kids, but all I ever see her do is drink and slobber over her b/f. Maybe someone could get the Countess from RHNY to teach Tamara to chew with her mouth closed--oh well, as long as she is eating she's not running someone down.
You and Slade seem to have a genuine love for each other. I love how supportive you both are and you seem very happy when the other succeeds and equally supportive when the other needs your help. You're both wonderful, caring people. I'm sure Slade appreciates you going to bat for him. Very well-written blog on what is going on with Slade and I will pray for Grayson's recovery.
So how did you like san antonio? Was it fun ? What did you all do? I so love your purses collection and the eyeshadow collection also. I didnt quite see what went on with this whole ladies trip of yours. So let me get this straight it was you and slade, alexis by herself and fernanda right! How is slades son doing? I will keep him in my prayers you and him can count on that for sure. much success to you! and stay away from tamra and vicki you dont need them you are better off with slade or the other women lol! luv ya!
I thought the show was about the housewives of ornage county? Every week there is always conversation about Slade not working. To not know Slade personally, I have to say that I don't know too many men that help out their partner in such a supportive way like Slade does for Gretchen. Granted, he is not working a 9-5 job, but if he is receiving bad press for everything, yes getting a job would be difficult. maybe if he were out of the public eye, not on camera so much things may get better for him media wise. My heart goes out to his son Grayson, until you go through something like that (having a sick child, husband etc.. ) you do not know what it's like and I get so upset hearing comments made from the other ladies on the show, when they have no clue. It's not always about how rich you are or how good you look, in the end we are all human beings. Bad things happen and you would think the other housewives on the show would be more emotional supportive and quit acting like heartless women. Anyway love the show. Keeping Grayson in prayers.
Gretchen you are a beautiful amazing woman inside and out you inspire me, keep standing by your man and his kids you will be blessed beyond your wildest dreams-
There are always 2 sides to every story. I have not been a huge fan of Slades because he's been very arrogant in the past. However, I can respect any man that will admit his faults and own up to his past and actions. I like how he admitted how he took his money and situation in the past for granted and admitted to being arrogant. That took balls and I respect him more for that. People have a hard time owning up to their personal hardships in life but you both have seemed to be very open and honest about life and your financial hardships. I appreciate you being honest and I wish you both all the best!
Hi Gretchen, Love your Brand! and Love you on Housewives! I have no comment regarding Slade's situation because I havent walked in his shoes. My heart goes out to his Son, Grayson.
Regarding your Handbag line, I would love to see you make a matching lipstick/credit card tote that I can grab and go when I dont want to carry the whole bag.
Best Wishes, Jett
Hang in there..... it's so unfortunatel for Slade but he has you standing by him, and hopefully the finances will one day work themselves out. Xwives can be such a thorn.... I know. Don't let that woman take up space in your head. My hubby's X almost drove me to leave him because SHE was so awful and always doing what she could to mess with us, and the kids opinions of us. Sick sick woman.... I can't imagine throwing a sick child into the mix, horrible. Good luck with our biz, and stay strong.
Gretchen, Your strength to stand up for what you believe is inspiring. The last three years I have taken care of my mother who has been slowly dying from lung disease. This last year has been extremely hard for her and myself taking care of her. She passed away this past October in my home and I was with her. To take care of her I quit my job because she needed me and I could not bear the thought of putting her in a nursing home. So, I know exactly what you went through with Jeff and what Slade is experiencing with the loss of a job and his sick son. To take care of her my credit went bad and I am curently starting over at age 55 looking for a job. Like Slade I had a good job (not making the big bucks like him) but it was with a major airline and making $24.00/hr. At my age and not a college degree I am now finding $8-$11/hr. It is devastating and does wear on your self esteem and your drive to get out there and hunt for a job. Slade is experiencing normal thoughts and I am glad he has your support. You will both make it through these hard times and unless someone has walked in your shoes, they should not even make a comment. The comment Tamra made last season about you taking off for the weekend just burned right through me. Unless she has taken care of a dying loved one, she should never have said that because she had no idea what she was talking about. By the way, didn't I hear her in one of the previous shows this season saying she doesn't get any money from Simon for child support? Maybe I misunderstood that show, but I believe she did say that. If you are a caregiver for someone, just to keep your own sanity, you have to get away at times. Anyway, I just want you to know I am a fan of yours and I will pray for you guys! Hang in there, it will get better.
Even though you're not my favorite on the show, I have to admit that I don't have anything very negative to say about you. Your ambition is one to be admired! Your dedication is also praise worthy. I can't even say anything negative about your relationship with Slade. You can't help who you fall in love with. I commend you in keeping your eyes wide open when dealing with this situation while still being supportive. Keep up the good work, sweet pea! Try not to let the negativity around you affect as much as possible. (I'm speaking about Alexis!!)
Gretchen, Just wanted to let you know that in the past years I felt you were not being treated fairly and that you have come through it all beautifu
I have to say thank you for making realize my first instinct on Slade all the way back in season one was correct. I felt that deep down that he was pretty decent guy and Jo was just dragging him down because he was so into her. I was nothing but right on this one. I always felt sorry for him in season one with how she treated him and didn't understand why he would want to be with a woman like that.
Gretchen, on the show Slade has said repeatedly that he took for granted his formerly inflated salary and now he can't get paid "even close to the same amount he used to make." In this economy, a lot of people have had to accept pay cuts for the same job they have been doing for years in order to avoid losing their job completely. Don't you think it's better for Slade to return to his former job at a much lower salary than to have no salary at all?
After reading about you & Slade, I think I have a better understanding of your relationship and the obstacles Slade is facing paying child support with reduced means of employment. I admire your sticking by him. You are a big girl and if he is the man for you---then that's great. Hopefully, things will work out ---wish you the best!
I've not been a real big fan of Slade, but who u love is not anyones business. I'm a registered nurse and my husband if an attorney, we faced a 7 year catastrophic illness of mine and faced financial ruin along with the medical fight. The public has no idea that very solvent citizens are very unlikely to survive financially through such an ordeal. Good luck to u, we survived it and hope u do as well
Gretchen, Please tell Slade that hes definately NOT a deadbeat! I have 5 children whose father has barely seen them in the past 6 yrs! Not to mention he barely pays child support, he never did. If he was at least in my kids lives and showed he cared about them at all it would mean so much. Yes, you need money to raise your kids, but there is more to being a parent and being there for your children is priceless! Slade please dont feel bad. Gretchen and Slade -keep being yourselves and everything will work out.
You are so much fun. I hope you never leave the series. You give each episode a shot in the arm that it badly needed.
You are so much fun. You are a shot in the arm the series definitely needed. I hope you never leave. You are awesome.