Kristen Doute

Kristen explains why she confessed, how deep her love is for Tom, and why she thinks Jax deserved to be punched.

on Feb 3

Hallelujah. No more dirty secrets or lies. This past summer was a frightening roller coaster ride. I had so many skeletons in my closet and the truth will ALWAYS prevail (especially if you're on a reality show).

That being said, the truth will also set you free -- and I'm in a much better place than I was then. Hindsight is always 20/20 and watching back I wish I had just told the truth when Jax spilled our secret. I was so afraid of the repercussions that I literally planned on taking it to my grave. In the moment, I would have done anything to make Jax look like the liar because I felt my entire life was on the line. I may have felt differently if Jax had come to me privately and said, "This is eating away at me, we have to tell them." He didn't announce it because he had remorse and that's what really bothered me. At that point, he had already screwed Tom over by confessing the Ariana secret and he had lost Stassi so in Jax's mind he had nothing left to lose. But I had everything to lose. Jax wanted attention/relevance in our group and that's exactly what he got. I don't, for a split second, condone what I did and couldn't be more sorry and ashamed. I do, however, think it's bulls--- that everyone turned their back on me and didn't even bat an eyelash at Jax.

. . .Everyone but Tom.