Ryan Serthant Is Just Like Drake

Hello beautiful people! All of you reading this are near and dear to my heart! Welcome back to Season 2 of Million Dollar Listing New York. It's been way too long of a break, and, if you have a problem with that, you should aggressively tweet Andy Cohen (@BravoAndy) and make sure the turnaround for Season 3 is much faster. . .Just a suggestion. Never forget that Ryan loves you.

So let's get down to business: what did you think of the premiere episode? They love to show me working out and that's because being a well-oiled machine is part of my overall mystique. I work out hard for you so I hope you appreciate it. Turns out I have more than just one dimple.

First of all, let me point out that I was the only agent to actually close a deal this episode. Are you impressed yet? You should be. Second of all, I really like how you get to see a lot of my quirks and funny antics this episode. I know some of the things I say may be pushing it, but that's what New York real estate is all about! I like to keep things fun and loose. I loved that we got to see the entire transaction unfold for PHA at The Park Imperial. This was not an easy deal. Everyone told me I was crazy for raising the price, but my gut told me I was doing the right thing and it turned out I was right. Sometimes it takes an out-of-the-box tactic like that to find the right buyer, even if he is right next door! And even though the party didn't find a competing buyer, it did make Jim and Oren feel like they could lose the opportunity.

Side note: P. Diddy and Christopher Meloni just sold their apartments in the same building.

What about the other guys on the show? Good question. First of all welcome on board to Luis Ortiz from Puerto Rico. I only mention he's Puerto Rican because Luis talks about it 30 times in Episode 1. Andy should make it a drinking game on WWHL. I do love the hair, and he makes the show very enjoyable to watch. The funniest part about Luis' first episode is him trying to find some undiscovered West Village Townhouse diamond -- by going between the desks at his Keller Williams office. Say what you'd like about the internet Luis, but trust me, you got real lucky on that one. New York City real estate is a vast web of information and danger; you have to be willing to crawl out and get dirty with the enemy.

Regarding Mr. Eklund and his palace of marble, what you don’t see is that I was there with a very interested client. I don't have time to just show up at people's open houses for fun. She was so excited to see the house before Fredrik immediately disrespected me in front of her. So in my defense, before I jumped in his listing's pool, there was much more antagonizing on his part that lead me to my daring decision.

Finally, I'd just like to remind you that I love you all for being here and enjoying this ride with me! Life is too short and precious not to smile every day. Don't get me wrong, I work as hard as anyone; I bleed for this life. I'm like that new popular Drake song: I started from the bottom and I have no plans on going back to that place. Let's kick some ass this season. I want to thank each and every one of you for your love and support. I have quite the team building up, and I want you to be a part of it! This is Ryan Serhant signing off and hoping that you'll be back with me next week for more dish.

Expansion, always, in all ways. GO GET IT!