Kate Middleton should have just worn a cape and flown off the hospital stairs to finish off her unbelievable feat — bringing home her new baby just seven hours after giving birth. Oh, and that’s in a red dress, heels, a blowout, and full makeup.
The rest of us are lucky if we know our own names or recognize our own bodies. Here she is smiling, like, “It’s all good!” which we interpreted as “My vagina’s fine!” And while one of the funniest reminders of what really goes on post-labor comes from Jimmy Kimmel’s wife, Molly McNearney, who wrote on Twitter: “Let’s keep this real for the moms. The Duchess is wearing a diaper,” alongside a post of Kate looking flawless in that dress.
Personal Space decided to ask some non-royal moms (and a few dads) for their take on strolling out of the hospital like it’s a runway on the same day you just released a baby into the world. Some say, hey, it’s part of her “job,” but still, doesn’t rest and health come first? This shouldn’t be part of anyone’s “job,” princess or not.
Here is what they said. (All are from New York, New Jersey, The Caribbean, Connecticut, Florida, and California, and all have young kids or new babies.)
Ellyn Harris calls it “strange” and “too short.”
Nena Kathryn Madonia says, “Cleaning crew, glam squad and adrenaline. We can all do it!!!”
Rachel Barrett explains, “Not ludicrous that she was leaving so soon, (I had Lola in a birth center so I actually couldn’t stay very long) but just says a lot about her role that she had to be so done up — that she can’t be seen publicly as anything but that image.”
Maureen Martin says, “She can’t be compared to an everyday mom. This is part of her job description and she has the staff to take care of all the details.”
Christina Bellomo O'Reilly says, “I never wanted to leave the hospital! 24 hour help and Percocet!”
Noelle Parisi Dahl says, “They gave me so many fluids I had moonface for like three days. But I wanted to leave the hospital as soon as possible. Jake even tried to make a deal with the residents that if they let me go right away he’d do all the discharge paperwork.”
Vanessa Strouse Kenney says, “I had a pretty easy delivery but pushing a watermelon sized baby out caused some, shall we say, massive discomfort and damage down south. Between the epidural and the fluids they gave me, I could barely stand upright until the next day.”
Sandra Demasi says, “If we all had a glamour squad that followed us everywhere we’d be out of the hospital that quickly too. Also, I’m sure she’s not going to be lacking any kind of personal care in her home. But honestly, I didn’t have any issues with any of the boys; in fact, with my first, right after I had him, I totally felt like I could leave a few hours after. I hate hospitals.”
Elizabeth Trzaska Gosnell says, “Not ludicrous!! If I was a princess and had people to make me look pretty after 13 hours or whatever of labor, I would have been psyched! Unfortunately I had my husband who doesn't know how to bring the right clothes to the hospital.”
Amy Silverman Silberman says, “Basically she can go home and rest since she’s a princess and all the baby nurses can take care of number three and her too!”
David Glantz says, “Please, they have a whole staff just for the children and you know the second they are back at their castle, she’s like (in best English accent), “F--- off ... I’m going to bed.”
Marisa Mirabello says, “It was her third; he probably climbed out on his own while she had tea.”
Courtney Thompson Saib says, “While a blowout sounds luxurious, I can’t fathom putting on panty hose hours after giving birth.”
Corynne Steindler Cirilli says, “Being in the hospital sucks. They wake you up every 30 minutes for something stupid. ‘Just taking your blood pressure, just taking your lunch order, just taking the baby’s vitals, just taking out the garbage, 4 a.m., time for Motrin…’ like, LET ME SLEEP!!! I would have loved to go home and if I had a midwife or nursing staff there like Kate probably does, I would have!”
Casey Brennan says, “I never wanted to leave the hospital! They did everything for me and I could sleep all day when the baby was. And the stretchy panties are everything. I definitely stashed about 20 extras into my bag on the way home … Oh, and I had so much Seamless sushi after nine months without any!”
Nicole M. says, “I remember my own mom telling me in her day, all the young mothers wanted to stay as long as they could. Breakfast in bed, someone changing the baby's diapers. Back home, dad doing all the laundry, cooking, cleaning the house ... stay in hospital, have a nice relaxing post-pregnancy cigarette ... it was R&R time.”
Keith Kelly says “The day the baby came home was a big day in the neighborhood ... Friends would come around just to see the new baby ... the only thing that was a bigger deal was getting a new puppy — because the puppy could stay outside right away.”
Lisa Marsh says, “I feel like she went home to a fully outfitted suite complete with medical staff and people to carry baby to and from. I, for one, recommended staying in the hospital as long as they'd let you to any mom who would listen, especially if there were other kids at home. Those are the last moments of being able to put your feet up.”
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