A heart shaped lock drawn in pink and purple lines

Bravo Insider Exclusive

To read this article, you must have a Bravo subscription.

The Daily Dish The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Erika Girardi Opens Up About Being "Tom's Third Wife" — And Why He Doesn't Wear a Ring

The Real Housewives singer shares how her attorney husband popped the question in her revealing new memoir.

By Jocelyn Vena
Erika, Go to Your Room

Love has been in the air for Erika Girardi and Tom Girardi for nearly 20 years. The couple married in 1999 and haven't looked back. And now we're learning even more about the longtime pair in Erika's new memoir, Pretty Mess. 

How to Watch

Watch The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills on Bravo Tuesdays at 8/7c and next day on Peacock. Catch up on the Bravo App.

In the book, out now, Erika breaks down just how Tom popped the question — or how he asked her to be his third Mrs. Girardi — and what happened after she said yes to his proposal. She writes:

After our engagement, Tom said, "Listen, I'll buy you anything you want. I don't care what it is. You name it. But I'm not wearing a wedding band. I never have, I never will. I don't like it. It's uncomfortable. Please don't ask me to."

Erika says she agreed to Tom's request because "a wedding band does not have magical powers. It is not going to stop anyone from doing something." Hear more about the early days of their relationship in this exclusive clip from her Pretty Mess audiobook, read by Erika herself. 

The pair never got a prenuptial agreement and were married in a small civil ceremony that included some big wigs from the legal world: Judge Paul Flynn, who presided over Snoop Dogg's 1995 murder trial, as well as Tom's good friend, Robert Baker, who defended O.J. Simpson in his civil trial.

The rest, of course, is history.

Hear more from her memoir, below.

See more of Erika and Tom before they joined The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Want the latest Bravo updates? Text us for breaking news and more!