True Reflections

As I sit down to write this blog for the first time I am struck by two things. One is that I am so sincerely glad that I did this show. Even though, It has been quite an experience, and a daunting task at times. The second is how much a person's life can change in such a short amount of time. We are only three episodes in, and I am finding myself looking at my past with much trepidation.

I was still blissfully unaware of the drastic changes that were going to happen in my personal life. This week, on the show, I was thrilled to see myself enjoying spending time with some of my oldest and dearest friends. Nick, who I played tennis with, and who surprised me in Las Vegas (although I was quite sure at the time that he was sent as a watch-dog for my husband) and Tricia, Nick's wife who you didn't see on camera this week, but hopefully will soon. Tricia was also in Vegas, but was back at the room getting ready for a John Mayer concert when the cameras were rolling. Nick and Tricia have been dear friends of both Kelsey and I for nearly a decade.

I have to thank Adrienne again for a wonderful trip to Las Vegas. I really enjoyed the time I spent with these wonderful, intelligent, and interesting women. I do think I was somewhat disconnected from the group that weekend. I suppose on some level I was feeling the need for quiet reflection. I have always been person who has been more comfortable around men. Maybe it was because I was so close to my brother and father. Through my time spent with them when I was young, I developed my love for sports and cars. Don't get me wrong I love a good fashion show as much as any girl—I just had a lot of time to develop other, not- so-girly interests in addition to shoes and purses. I find I really put careful consideration into my friendships with women because the relationships can be so sensitive. Let's face it: some women can be down right catty. This is what makes me cautious, but also what makes my true friendships so dear to me.

Also on the show this week you saw what was the beginning of a misunderstanding between Kyle and myself. I have learned over the past 14 years to keep my family life private and have become quite guarded in this respect. I know that seems contrary to a reality show, but it is still a learning process of what to share and what to keep private. I really felt that Kyle was a virtual stranger to me, and when she was riffling so many pointed questions at me about my vacation plans, it felt very intrusive—almost an interrogation of sorts. This lead to a misunderstanding, and, well, the story will continue from there.

It is interesting to watch yourself on a reality show. It makes you think about the things that you say and how what you meant to convey can be so easily miscommunicated and misunderstood. I am a playful person, and my playful sarcasm may be falling on deaf ears. My self-deprecating humor may not be as funny as I thought. I may have to put off publishing my first "joke book" until I fine-tune my craft. Lastly I want to thank all of the true fans of the show. I know that this season will not disappoint them. There’s so much more to see—we are only getting warmed up. I do appreciate the support both for the show and personally in my time of evolution.

Until next time, Camille