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Glutton for Punishment

Jill addresses the Ramona and Jennifer situation, and ponders Ramona's core.

By Jill Zarin

Cindy invited me over to see her apartment so we could get to know each other. After all, we are going to be spending a lot of time together! I knew she was friends with Ramona so I was a little nervous, but I knew when I first met her she was my kind of girl. We both come from Long Island, and we are the same age, and we found out we have friends in common.

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When Cindy said "Ramona's core is not good," it validated a lot of the feelings I have had over the years. We have a lot of friends in common. Cindy said, "We have our ups and lows" (she meant downs), but we accept Ramona for who she is. What the heck does that mean? Why would anyone accept someone who makes so many condescending remarks and offers little respect to anyone? I didn't want to gossip about Ramona, but when someone starts talking. . .well it was hard to sit there and say nothing -- especially if you are a filming a reality show.

Cindy said "her core is not good." Is she right? I always try to find the good in people. I let a lot of things go in regards to Ramona, and years have passed. Maybe it's time to take a serious look at our friendship. Ramona invited us to a wine tasting party this week. Even though Bobby had to come home from work a little early to make it, we showed up. Am a just a glutton for punishment?

Side comment: How cute are Cindy's little girls? I am available for babysitting!

I want to get right to it. Ramona and Jennifer both make me sick. I thought the bride and I were friends. I never thought in a million years the two of them would set me up. Ramona did it last year with Bethenny at her house and now with Alex at the wedding. Different circumstances but the same goal: To catch me off guard, press my buttons, and get a reaction. Then when she gets a reaction, she blames and criticizes me for reacting. She openly admitted to enjoying doing this to me the morning of the wedding in Episode 1.

Why didn't Jennifer tell me in advance that she invited Alex? She knew how I felt about her at the time, and it should have been my decision if I wanted to go.

Sonja's party: I didn't want to go because I was so sick, but since I rented the costume and knew Luann wasn't going, I couldn't abandon ship. She needed Housewives! I am not going to lie. When you hear Masquerade Ball...well..let's just say I did think it was a sit down dinner. Sorry Sonja.

I had just come back from Australia. My friend Vince drove me, and I came to support Ramona, as I always have in the past. I was having a nice conversation with some of the guests when Ramona had to pull me away and attack me. The bride was across the room. Again, Ramona is mad at me over something someone else said I said. I said, "Bring her over"! I had NOTHING to hide. Whatever I said I meant. Details not important. He said, she said, all I know is Ramona invited me to her party to make a scene. I showed up to Ramona's party to help her and once again, she uses me. But this time, I was calm. She was wired and acting insane. Everyone had been talking about her attacking Howie at Cindy's birthday party and a lot of other things regarding Ramona.

Ramona refused to bring Jennifer over to talk to me to my face, but she didn't expect me to see Jennifer on the way out. I spoke to Jennifer, and it is what it is. We both remember it differently and will never agree as to what happened. But Ramona? She says I should talk to her face, I say, "Fine lets have lunch," and she says "I'll think about it"? She didn't expect me to be so calm. She thought if she pushed my buttons again I would react. I have changed. I listened to her "complaints" and offered to meet her alone for lunch to talk about it. I asked her a few times for lunch, and you will see what happens.

By the time she "balled me out" and embarrassed herself in front of all her guests, I was really hurt. I realized once again that no matter how hard I try to "show up" and be supportive, it will never be enough. If I was really bad mouthing her behind her back for years do you think it would have taken her this long to confront me? Are you kidding? Ramona has no self-control and even if she wanted to hold it in, she couldn't. Ramona is a drama queen. He said. She said. Enough said.

I think I will take my toys and go home. Haha!

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