Ashley Darby says she's been burned by fellow The Real Housewives of Potomac cast member Katie Rost enough. Things got heated between the two in the Cayman Islands after Katie called Ashley "stupid and dumb" — twice.
Ashley now says she was wrong to trust her in the first place.
But how would she have known?
Psychology Today says there a few things to keep in mind when you're trying to decide whether you trust someone or not — things that would have been helpful for Ashley to consider before Katie came for her in the Cayman Islands.
"Before trusting a person, try to determine how often he or she is correct... Most important, see if a person acts justly even when it's inexpedient. That is especially key if the person has much to gain by acting against your interest and you’re unlikely to detect it."
Some key traits of trustworthy people are laid out in another report:
"They're consistent with their behavior and language.
"They show compassion and humility.
"They respect boundaries.
"They compromise and don't expect something for nothing.
"They are respectful when it comes to time.
"They show gratitude.
"They give up all the facts, even if it hurts.
"They confide in you.
"They're right a lot, and do the research that leads to verifiable conclusions.
"They skip the water cooler gossip.
"You know who they're connected to, and they try to connect you.
"They're there for you and others."
"To discern between people who might save your life and those who might ruin it, you must be reliable, honest — in a word, trustworthy — toward yourself. And we do this far less often than most people realize," reports HuffPost, which even created a "trust-o-meter" to analyze people you're on the fence about.
Here's how it works:
"The first three are the 'yes' questions; if Person X is completely trustworthy, you’ll answer yes to all three. The second three are the 'no' questions — if Person X deserves your trust, the answer to all three will be negative."
The “yes” questions:
1. Does Person X usually show up on time?
2. When Person X says something is going to happen, does it usually happen?
3. When you hear Person X describing an event and then get more information about that event, does the new information usually match Person X’s description?
The “no” questions:
4. Have you ever witnessed Person X lying to someone or assuming you’ll help deceive a third person?
5. Does Person X sometimes withhold information in order to make things go more smoothly or to avoid conflict?
6. Have you ever witnessed Person X doing something (lying, cheating, being unkind) that he or she would condemn if another person did it?
Interesting, isn't it?
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