When we’re going through a terrible breakup, we may eat a ton of ice cream or binge on sappy romance movies. But when that phase is over — or even when we're still in the throes of it — is there something more strategic and effective we could be doing than wallowing in a good cry?
The answer, according to a new breakup retreat in upstate New York, may be an Eat, Pray, Love-style getaway. Renew Breakup Bootcamp, which is located in the Hudson Valley of New York State, is launching February 10 — just in time lonely hearts to find solace Valentine’s Day solace.
Located on 30 acres of woodland, Renew Breakup Bootcamp is a multi-day retreat that offers therapy, one-on-one sessions with a relationship coach, nutritious meals, massage, yoga, and meditation. Sounds very new age — and indulgent — but can that sort of thing actually help soothe a breakup in a meaningful way, or is it just all just a gimmick?
One expert says there can be real value in such an approach. “Clients come to me after seeing my videos on how to get out from under, over, and move on from a breakup and they are often in an emotionally weak, scared, insecure, angry, lost place," says dating and sex coach Laurel House of E!’s Famously Single. "Accepting the reality of the break, taking responsibility for your contribution, forgiving yourself and your ex, coming to peace with the end, then exploring and reacquainting yourself with yourself, rediscovering your passions, extracting the positive lessons from the relationship, and finding love again within yourself is a process."
More than a process, it's a strategy. “It's one that I help clients with everyday," she says. "A retreat environment, where you are surrounded with loving people who know how to lead and support you through the process can be incredibly effective."
When you're going through a difficult breakup, self care is an important part of healing. “You want to make yourself a priority. Become your own best friend. It can easily become a time of wallowing or reckless behavior with a tendency to rely upon drugs, alcohol, or other unhealthy habits that offer a temporary escape,” says Antonia Hall, a psychologist and relationship expert.
All told, the pros say, going away for a healthy little retreat could indeed help reset you. “It will remind you that through self love practices, you are always going to be the source of your own happiness. Giving yourself what you might not have been receiving from the relationship is incredibly empowering. It also might remind you that you truly deserve to be happy, even if it means being with someone other than your ex,” says Hall.
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