Study Confirms Donald Trump Officially Ruined Thanksgiving, Fighting Families Refuse to Travel for the Occasion

Because a turkey leg can also be used as a weapon. 

A year has gone by, but tempers are still hot enough to cook a turkey. (Had to.) Thanks to Donald Trump, Thanksgiving 2016 was a bummer for many families, who were so divided over his win, they couldn’t face each other over the holiday, no matter how good the food was.

Last year, Thanksgiving arrived just two weeks after Trump was announced the winner of the presidential election over Hillary Clinton, causing the political divide in some families to run so deep, it ruined the traditional family meal. Many family members chose to do their own thing instead of traveling to see loved ones, because, well, they were so pissed about who some family members voted for that they couldn't even look them in the face. And now it's official: A new study reveals that families with members who differed in who they voted for spent less time with each other on the national holiday than in 2015.

To determine where people lived, the study used geo-locating data from 10 million smartphones to track which individuals traveled for their Thanksgiving celebration. It was first determined where a person lived, using the location where they most often are between the hours of 1 and 4 a.m. They were then tracked between 1 and 5 p.m. on Thanksgiving, and if the two locations were different, it was inferred the person was out celebrating the holiday at a family member or friend's house.

Nailing down phone users' political orientation was based on county returns from the presidential election. If the user lived in a district that voted for Clinton, then they were considered a Democrat; for Trump, a Republican.

The study determined that Democrats didn’t care so much about a delicious meal with the fam — they were five percent less likely than Republicans to travel for Thanksgiving in 2016, compared to the prior year. They hated Trump so much, no amount of cranberry sauce or homemade apple pie was enough to calm them down. Republicans went looking for turkey and a fight — they were more likely to travel to a Democratic household for the holiday. They also left earlier, an average of 40 minutes, probably just about when Aunt Carol started throwing mashed potatoes at the Trump-voting visitors. Why'd it hve to end like this, Carol?

It turns out, political advertising played a major role in the holiday. In areas where more political ads ran, the more Thanksgiving was shortened. A dem visiting Trump-loving Texas? Grab an appetizer and get out before it gets ugly. A right-leaning visitor to Clinton-worshipping New York? Better keep your mouth full of meat. Just keep chewing. Don't say a word

“Thanksgiving dinners are further shortened by around 1.5 minutes for every thousand political advertisements aired in the traveler's home media market,” the study found.

Here's to this year hopefully improving. #MakeThanksgivingGreatAgain!

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