Cast Blog: #RHONY

I'll Do Me

Heather wonders why no one could enjoy the idyllic scenery of St. Barths and explains why the double date upset her.

If it is me, me, me, me…then I am just going to do me too.

This week concludes the vacation that one can refer to as the “Week from Hell.” Can you imagine, given the absolutely idyllic setting we found ourselves in, that we could not just have fun together!? Well, if you thought that was possible -- then you don’t know this group of ladies.

At the beginning of this episode, I learned that Aviva and Carole had planned to go on a separate double date to dinner that excluded all of the other women -- including myself. To say that I was bummed to hear that is what they were doing would be an understatement. Part of the hurt comes from that fact that I left behind my family and my business to go down to St. Barths to spend time and bond with the ladies as a group. Many of you are working moms just like me, so you know the logistics that go into coordinating a trip. My husband Jon is amazing, but he is a partner in a commercial real estate firm and has heavy obligations too, so I have to work out extra time for my kids and our wonderful nanny, and then there are all the details with Yummie. It is a lot to leave for seven days on holiday and it's the rare that I would ever even do it. The other part of my disappointment came from the fact that Aviva and Carole were my girls.

And the one-on-one time I was having with Carole was special. I agree with Carole that it does become difficult to create true friendships when you reach a certain age. I read an interesting article in the New York Times awhile back that I am reminded of and encourage you all to check out here. It touches on how we make our closest friends earlier in life. . .at college and in our 20s.

So, off we go to lunch and no time was wasted getting into it. Aviva again with her pleading for attention and desire for accolades for flying to St. Barths, it was exhausting! Where is the cool Aviva? COME BACK! The Samonja didn’t stop either with the hen pecking. The continuous reliving of the flight on the small plane sends Carole into a painful recollection of John and Caroline's devastating crash -- one that was felt around the world. And simply, just where are everyone’s manners today? I am an easy going girl when it comes to etiquette, (notice my potty mouth at the table), but this is ridiculous. Ladies, let’s just sit down and eat!?

Finally, I get up too and find Carole and Aviva getting pedicures instead of getting this lunch on already and discussing said “double date.” And at this point I am ready to throw in the towel. Rather than stick around and scream, I am out. I literally WALK home, grab my book and a towel, and go to the beach to do me, and just chillax!

Carole is always included in my plans when Russ is out of town and I am always considerate that he is often on the road. But I have had enough of this crazy tail chasing everyone is doing. I am not going to participate in this foolish game of musical chairs or any further shouting matches. I am making my point clear by opting out and it feels right to me. When Carole does come down to Saline Beach to check in on me, I am happy. I don't like to hold onto anger and especially now with Carole. A little “adult time out” with just the two of us and a yummie seawater swim really did the trick.

I am seeing with you viewers the scene with Aviva and Sonja fighting in the kitchen for the first time tonight. Wow, isn’t it interesting how quickly a conversation can spiral out of control? And talk about spiraling out of control, our Sonja needs to get a handle on her consumption of the spirits. We all love the grape, but she is letting loose on another level so I am going to attribute some of the crazy to that, but I cannot excuse Aviva for her inability to “let the damn plane ride go!” Take the Ferry next time, girl!

We wake up on the last day to be greeted by a set up of massages, manicures, and pedicures. The royal treatment all arranged by Carole! I am in heaven! It is complete perfection on every level. We luxuriate and I ignore the drama. I am focusing on myself again today. And after all that pampering, Carole has organized a ride to the pier for sunset cocktails followed by Russ’ concert.

I missed this during the moment, but watching the episode with you, I realize that Aviva pays me the nicest compliment on the ride to the pier. We are discussing the Ramona situation, hers not mine, and she turns to me and says in reference to how I dealt with Ramona’s wrath, “You are a lot stronger than I am.” And, I just realized that maybe I am, and maybe I need to back off Aviva a little. Maybe I can just be that strong woman and let these ladies have their moments. And when the going gets too rough, I can always just do me again. The concert was nothing short of amazing. I am only sad you guys don't get to see it. Russ is so talented. I encourage you all to check out Russ Irwin! We arrive back at the house for our last dinner to find Sonja and Ramona doing what they love best. . .wine. LuAnn, Carole, Aviva and I sit down and basically beg those two to pull it together and come for a bite. It is our last dinner at this amazing house and despite all the ups and downs we want everyone there. After some primping and packing and overall silliness, they finally make it to the table.

We eat and then I concoct the idea to lighten the mood with a midnight, “Goodbye St. Barths” swim. So I am in first. . .followed quickly by Carole, Lu, and Aviva! Sonja. . .and let me be clear: I love this woman. . .strips down and jumps in. No one can accuse Sonja of being a party pooper that is for sure! Ramona is coming up with every reason in the book not to join in the fun so Carole and I make a plan. Carole will distract her by having her pass a drink while I go into the kitchen and wham. . .I hip check her into the big drink!! Like I said on the show, the entire trip was worth it for that moment alone! Hehe! And Ramona is a great sport. We are all like a bunch of school girls. The trip was rough and we had some highs and lows, but we ended on the highest of highs with laughter all together.

As always, thank you for all of your support and feedback. You make being on the show so rewarding for me. To learn more about me and my shapewear, go to Facebook,, and You can also enjoy 10 percent off your next Yummie Tummie order by entering code "Iamheathert10" at check out. Don't forget to follow me on Twitter at @iamHeatherT and please visit to sign up to become an organ and tissue donor.

Love you all,

Sonja: Don't Take Yourself Too Seriously

Sonja explains why she and Ramona are family, why she's hiring Aviva, and why LuAnn is still her friend.

At this point, I am numb to the whole BookGate debate. I am not on anyone's side, I just hope that both books are bestsellers and that Carole and Aviva are making enough money to pay the bills with their books because BookGate has definitely taken an emotional toll on their friendship. I know that they were close and had great times together. In fact, Carole was once the godmother to Aviva's daughter. How can this come between them? Such contention over the accusations! I don't know why they let it get so heated. It's not worth it! I just hope that they can forgive each other at some point. As you get to know someone, you get to see their strengths and weaknesses -- and you have to accept those if you're going to be friends.

I was surprised when the girls laughed at me discussing my ability to forgive and voicing my Christianity. I think that it is one of the reasons that I can live my own life and not worry about everyone else's or the grass being greener. It's all relative. We are on Earth for such a short time. I am enjoying every day of my life. I am grateful for the family and friends that I have and my beautiful daughter.

I have so much more than many other people, and I remind myself of that every day with the charity work that I do. That's why I feel so much more comfortable working with artists, animals, the LGBT, and children. It's such a sensitive, caring, and loving place to be. I love my Sonja In The City event planning business because it lets me be me -- an artist and a promoter -- while helping others reach their highest capabilities. Plus I get to do all that while helping me get my daughter through school in a stable environment. It keeps me connected to the movers and shakers who help me manage my investments. I love to produce and to contribute. It makes me feel good.

I believe some of the women fail to take me seriously because I only show them my party side. There is a private side to me that most people don't see, because they only see me out at social events and while I'm entertaining. I throw a lot of events, so a lot of people only see that side, as it's my business and the way I broker some of my deals.

It is amazing how moms like Heather find strength to do dealing with their children's issues, like her son's health and hearing loss. It's what we do with loved ones. We do it with marriage partners too! I surprised myself when my ex had a terrible accident and I was called upon to deal with all of the doctors, therapists, and financial advisors.

I dont feel that Ramona called Aviva vile. She said that she had a vile side. That's different!

I'm not upset that Ramona spoke behind my back about my financial problems. She's human, and I spoke my feelings then and we worked through it the way that family does. We have too much water under the bridge to let opinions or men get in between us.

Heather questioning the legitimacy of my friendship with Ramona is just silly. She knows that we have been friends forever and whatever I have said about Ramona I have told her to her face. Heather knows this very well -- since I'm very upfront about my feelings with her.

The girls saying that Aviva's leg throw was staged is silly. I let Aviva know that everyone was saying she was fake. Even if she plans to throw it on the table to make a point, that doesn't make it staged. It just means she was pushed to a limit. I thought she was hilarious. After all, it was a private party in the back room. We weren't in the actual restaurant. Aviva doesn't go around throwing her leg around in normal restaurant situations. Maybe she and I should take her act on the road! A real dog and pony show! I always said I was a performer, a comedian, and a producer. At my Sonja In The City parties, now we can include Aviva as part of the show!

My overall thoughts of the season was that the reunion had more drama. I felt the season flip-flopped around quite a bit. Harry and I will always have a very strong relationship, just as Ramona and Aviva will always be in my life. Aviva's son Harrison is like my family.

Ramona was definitely going through something this season. I let her know I was upset, but I can't change her and she can't change me. We accept each other the way we are and we work our differences out.

I didn't know LuAnn was going through a breakup. She never shared that with me, and I was getting upset that she wasn't trusting my friendship and was blaming me for everything. I didn't give any credence to any of the rumors that were going around town through the salon that Satoko worked at. Kristen and I just asked the facialist to tell us for fun. I can't stop LuAnn from running out of parties with my guys -- just like I can't stop Harry from taking off and leaving me because he knows I want commitment and he wants to fool around. But that doesn't mean LuAnn's not my friend and that I can't speak my mind in front of her, and it doesn't mean that Harry isn't someone that I love as well.

I hope that you found the season entertaining. I hope that you don't take yourself too seriously! And when the naysayers back you into the corner, just say what Glinda the Good Witch said to the Wicked Witch of the West "Be off with you, your black magic doesn't work here!"

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