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Chris, Alpha dog of expediting, jumps in to the captain’s chair. Kerry rebuffs him by taking his sweet ass time putting up his food. This is causing a disaster for Patricia, whose duck is now overcooked and she has to get more breasts on the barbie.
Kerry has done a pork belly with greens and taro root puree. Patricia has a duck with Massaman curry and pineapple. The duck is so rare that James asks for a recook, which is a royal pain in the ass to Patricia. Saipin says something in Thai that equates to, “These people have no idea what they are doing.” Patricia is battling Kerry in the back, but Kerry is not really into the fighting thing. He’s a lover, not a fighter. Patricia decides this war should go all emotional and offers a hug. Is it a real hug or a tactical hug?
Everyone gets called to the firing squad. Chris and Kerry are tops and Chris wins, some solace for his defeat last week where he made a great dish that was very misunderstood by the Bunny.
Bottoms are Art, Patricia, and Lorena. Art’s positives contain the terms “plain” and “simple," and that is never a good omen if those are the laudings. James is glad he threw the Southern jazz hands on the dish but has problems with it. James. if you ever say “Southern jazz hands” again I will come at you like a Spider monkey.
Lorena’s soup garnishes were an issue. I have a rule that soup garnishes have to fit in a spoon. If the spoon was a giant soup maybe this would have worked.
Patriceo’s duck was underdone and she throws Kerry under the bus for this. Kerry don’t care, cause he was on top. Actually he feels really bad and apologizes profusely. Yeo is tired, and it’s showing. The past three episodes have put the stress on her. I know that feeling. You are all into the competition for a while, and then you start stumbling and it just isn’t fun anymore. Then you start getting a little homesick, and then you just want to get out of dodge. It’s a whole lot easier if you're winning.
Art packs his knives and his Speedo and goes back to bake cakes for Obama, Gaga, and many others whose names end in "a." Lorena is a Venezuelan version of verklempt. She’ll get over it when the Taco Bell money comes in.
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My bucket list: #1 Have a beer with Hugh. #2 Have a beer with Hugh and Anthony Bourdaine. Hugh you are hilarious, the best part of this show.
One Question. Why didn't Patricia finish her duck the second time and make Kerry wait if he was the one that too to long? Or send her's out the first time and not wait for him?
Hugh...you are on fire!! What a biting pitch perfect commentary on the episode. Too many pithy comments to keep track of. We have a time-honored tradition in my house - watch Top Chef Masters on Amazon Video on Demand and then to the computer to read Hugh's blog!
I never understood why Art Smith was back on Top Chef Masters since he's already had one shot at it and was sent home for a vegan dessert he made. There was nothing controversial about his first appearance on Top Chef Masters so it makes no sense that he was brought back again instead of letting us meet a new chef. At any rate, Art is okay in small doses but it's kind of creepy to me when a 50 year old adult (man or woman) act s like a prepubescent little girl most of the time. I wish Art well but I'm glad he's gone.
LOL, I love your blog Chef Acheson. I've been waiting for your contestant experience to show up. I think you should tell more of how it really is. How much sleep did you get? When did you guys eat a real meal or did you even want to? Did you go to a holding area after being eliminated? I've wondered how celeb pro chefs took staying together for a month.
I really felt Curtis pressured Patricia into throwing Kerry under the bus. She seemed very reluctant to say anything until she was pushed. I also felt the brief for the challenge was—as usual—unclear. Were the chefs to make authentic Thai food or put a Thai spin on their own styles? Chris was both criticized for not making authentic and praised for putting his own spin on it.