Tom: My DVR and I Have so Much History

Tom says Kristen's heart-to-heart was classic "Kristen Projection" and commends James for being so manipulative.

Hello everyone, and welcome back to my third blog installment.

I'm going to jump back to the mixology fiasco for a sec, since we are dealing with the aftermath. I going to make a comparison between my character and the character (or lack there of) of certain other people.

OK I realize my apology video was embarrassing and maybe seemed over-the-top to some. But ask yourself: Why would I send that video? Was it because I thought Scheana and Shay would never forgive me or speak to me again? Also, did I apologize to Lisa because I thought somehow I would lose my job? Of course not! I knew Scheana and Shay would get over it eventually. I sent that video because I felt absolutely horrible that Scheana and Shay had to spend her birthday night in the hospital. All I could imagine was Shay holding Scheana's hand while she sobs as a needle is jammed continuously into her foot in order to stitch up that nasty cut and that made me feel really (REALLY!) bad.

Also, I didn't apologize to Lisa because I wanted her to reverse my suspension. I just wanted her to know I was truly sorry. To me, that's what taking responsibility for your actions is all about. When an apology is truly genuine, all you want in return is forgiveness.

James and Kristen completely lack this trait, as well as any self awareness. Look at both of them and the way that they had made most of Scheana's birthday party all about attacking me and my relationship. Look at Kristen, in how she had punched me three times after the scuffle had already been broken up (giving me my black eye). At James and the fact that he had aggressively gotten in my face to begin with, provoking me, when I was clearly trying to be polite and defuse the situation. Kristen and James never even made any attempts to apologize until -- yep, that's right! -- he had to face consequences for his actions! Until then, he was running around telling everyone that the whole situation was bullsh--, and I was solely responsible for everything. Only when motivated by the thought of losing his ability to continuously take Beamer selfies and pay bills did he finally change his tune. James makes this apology to Lisa for the most selfish reason possible. NOT because he wants Lisa's forgiveness, but because he wants something else from her. . .his job

Now, while we're on the subject of James' apology, I found it rather funny that he refers to writing a letter to someone, as solely an "English" custom and an idea he came up with, when it was clearly Max (Lisa's son), who gave him the idea. I do give James some credit. At least we know he can be pretty manipulative, knowing he could exploit Lisa's softer side by going this "letter" route. I feel it's pretty obvious he used this to strike a maternal cord in her, subconsciously reminding Lisa of a time when maybe young Max kicked a soccer ball through the neighbor's window, and got caught lying about it. James is not Lisa's eight-year-old son who got caught steeling bubble gum. He's A SUR busser. He's Lisa's employee who regularly stole her sangria and got drunk off it at work. Among other things, he regularly lied about his parents being best friends with Lisa. I want you, for a moment, to imagine what it's like when James is NOT doing his job but instead: walking around like a buzzed Kermit, with his red stained sangria mouth, yapping to customers about how his parents are long time friends with Ken and Lisa, and how he's only working here as a favor to Lisa because he's really this huge DJ who tours with Deadmau5 and DJ Blah-Blah-Blah! Imagine Lisa hearing this from her friends, as well as what it's like having to work with that. . .Now, imagine how ridiculous most of us at SUR felt it was for Lisa to even consider rehiring him.

It's really unfortunate that I feel as though I'm going to have to spend a large portion of my blogs every week setting the record straight when it comes to certain people's lies and projections. So let's move on to Kristen claims of still having to pay my bills. It seems strange that such a spiteful person would so generously still be paying for my cable and car insurance right? Well that's because she was most definitely NOT.

Two months prior to Scheana's birthday party, I got into an accident and my car was totaled, at which point my policy was canceled and moved to the claims department. You don't have to continue paying insurance on a car that has liability coverage only when it's sitting in a junkyard totaled. Your policy is simply canceled.

Next, the cable box situation was solved a few months prior when Kristen and I had specifically taken a trip to the cable branch to make sure that this cable situation would be taken care of permanently and she would NEVER be charged for my service. She had started the cable service in her name, but when we broke up, I wanted to keep the DVR box for obvious reasons. We couldn't take her name off it unless we returned the equipment. I'm sure you all can relate to how horrifying that thought was to me! My DVR box and I have so much history! Anyways, Kristen and I came to an agreement that met ALL of her stipulations! I added my name, social security number, and bank account info, as well as set up automatic payments. So there should be absolutely NO issues, a dead subject, DONE. . .

Well with Kristen there is and always will be issues no matter how hard I try to prevent them. So, she goes on to lie to James about these things for a couple reasons. One of them being that she wants to discredit me as a responsible person anyway she can (per usual). Another reason is to make it seem to James as though it is MY fault that she keeps having to interact with me.

Kristen saying SHE wants to "break the ties" when I'm the one who is quickly trying to pack up her stuff while she stands around trying to have a heart-to-heart is a classic "Kristen Projection." To say you don't hate us, when you spent Scheana's whole birthday saying the opposite, as well as hitting a bag imagining it's mine and Ariana's face, is just ridiculous.

I really truly don't like seeing Kristen unhappy. In fact, want her to BE happy, but we are never going to get back together. Kristen really needs to accept that and stop trying to sabotage my current relationship, telling James lies, and making excuses to interact or involve herself in my life altogether. I feel it's pretty obvious that I am very much a sensitive and compassionate person, maybe sometimes too much. But after all Kristen has put me through during and after our relationship, I feel it's just made it impossible. It's not that I want to be cold to Kristen. In fact, I hate it. I just feel she gives me no choice. I also think at this point especially after recent events, it's the best and most responsible way to handle the situation for all of us, including her and James.

All Posts About: Tom Sandoval

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