I wanted to write you a (love) letter of sorts, and figured this would be a good place to do it; since you love The Real Housewives franchise so much, it isn’t totally unlikely you’ll see this. I know you are on vacation with John and Luna and Miles (and your mom) in Bali, because I obsessively follow you on both Instagram and Twitter to see what you’re saying/doing/eating. But we all know you’re still scrolling the web, trolling the president, and all around being awesome, and thank God for that, because you taking a break from social media would just be the worst.
I had a baby girl 14 weeks ago (Phoebe!) and have been feeling pretty down about my body. All of the Peloton cycling, running, and lettuce eating in the world isn’t getting back what I used to have. My closet full of clothes don't fit and I’ve taken to wearing Yoga pants and size L button down shirts around town, to the delight of my husband. I feel awful every time I step into the shower, for what I’m soaping up looks nada like my former body (no supermodel here, but lean enough). Well, that’s gone now. I'm not sure what’s hanging off of me or where all this extra skin came from.
But then you posted a “mom bod alert,” showing off your real post-baby body in a bikini. You look amazing, by the way, but after two babies you showed us that stretch marks and little pooch of a belly happen to the best of us. You made my shower a little easier that day.
“Instagram is crazy. I think it’s awesome people have killer bodies and are proud to show them off (I really do!!) but I know how hard it can be to forget what (for lack of a better word) regular ol’ bodies look like when everyone looks bonkers amazing…also I don’t really call this “body confidence” because I’m not quite there yet. I’m still super insecure. I’m just happy that I can make anyone else out there feel better about themselves!” you wrote.
You are a superwoman for showing us what’s real, for this I thank you. Not everyone pops out a baby and 12 days later slides into their skinny jeans. Even (some) supermodels.
This week you also admitted that even stunningly beautiful women get insecure, jealous, and act “crazy,” even if you were 22 when you lost your s**t over something that happened with John on a music video set. You used Twitter to tell the story of getting filled with rage when John was dancing and laughing with another woman and you didn’t behave so well, even though he was doing it for work. Haven’t we all been there? Haven't we all embarrassed ourselves at one time or another acting immaturely? No one ever admits it. You made me feel like I wasn’t alone in feeling insecure, or not good enough for my husband, or family, or friends sometimes. You made it normal and not “insane” or “crazy” to sometimes not be able to reign in intense emotions. As Dorinda says, "you made it nice." You always make it nice.
You recently photoshopped a picture of yourself looking like a Kardashian, with a size zero waist and a cartoonishly huge butt, writing: “I have been training. to be an Instagram fitness model. This is after one bag of tea and 5 reps of 2 squats !!!! If I can do it so Can U!!!!” showing you can even throw a little shade at your friends while keeping it on the funny side.
You've risked death by cuddling with a tarantula hawk wasp, told Meghan Markle’s father to cut it out, came home drunk and passed out on the floor, dissed Melania Trump, and breastfed a doll to amuse your daughter.
So here's to you. In a world where everything is so PC, where everyone obsesses over creating the perfect (not-real) life palette on Instagram, we have you. You make everything better. You make all the feelings, all the uncomfortable stuff, feel normal. We (I) need you.
Don’t ever change.
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