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The Daily Dish Relationships

Is Your Relationship Doomed If Your Partner Won't Fully Commit?

In other words, what's going on with Jamie Foxx and Katie Holmes?

By Marianne Garvey

They say they aren’t, we all know they are so let’s just get on with it.

Katie Holmes and Jamie Foxx just love to play their silly little “we’re not dating” game, but we saw you on that yacht, we saw you at that dinner, please stop being so annoying about your relationship status. The jig is up and has been for a while. In fact, US Weekly is reporting that Katie is “infatuated” with her beau, despite the fact he’s not really looking to get married.

“It’s what Katie signed up for,” says the report, which also includes accounts of the actor flirting with multiple women behind Katie’s back. “Jamie does care for her, but his recent behavior makes people question that,” the insider added.

So why is she putting up with this, exactly? For one, she was already married and we all know how difficult that was to escape, I mean, disentangle herself from.

New York City-based therapist Dr. Liz Lasky has some thoughts on being in a relationship where one partner just won’t commit 100 percent. It’s not good.

“If you are looking for a healthy committed relationship, where both people are equally invested, you may be doomed if one partner won't commit,” she tells Personal Space. “The idea of attachment is a funny thing. People tend to have different types of attachments based on how they were raised.

Learning how to have relationships helps people build tolerance to certain levels of commitments.  Some people have an easier time feeling safe in a committed relationships where others feel ambivalent, scared, or anxious.”

OK, so maybe Katie really doesn’t care? But if she does …

“Often I'll ask my clients in situations like this if they want someone who will be committed and available to them,” Lasky says. “Some people say yes and some people say no. The people who do want to have a committed partner sometimes need to be re-anchored in their own desires of having a committed boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse.”

One way to work it out when one partner wants to get married and the other doesn’t, Lasky says, is through some good therapy and counseling. “Through this process, the couple will be able to see if both people can be satisfied in the marriage.

“As I always say, different types of relationships work for different types of people. Ultimately it's up to the individual how much arguing, doubt, fear, and anxiety they're willing to put up with.”

And how many pictures of your boyfriend flirting with other women. That too.

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