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Candiace Dillard Bassett's wedding, which was featured on Episode 2 of The Real Housewives of Potomac Season 4, was a beautiful affair, though it was privately fraught with tension. The RHOP bride invited her half-brother against mother Dorothy's wishes (she objected because her brother was the product of Candiace's father's affair) and she feared her mother would have a negative reaction a the wedding.
Luckily, there was no drama at the wedding, and both Candiace and her mom had a great time. But before the wedding, Candiace consulted Karen Huger about how to approach the delicate situation. When Karen sat down with The Daily Dish podcast, she explained her perspective.
"I am friends with Candiace first and... my desire as the friend of a grown woman is to say to her as a mother of a grown daughter — [Karen's daughter] Rayvin [Huger]'s 21 now — 'We're always going to love you. We're your mom. Yes, we're going to have a moment when we don't get our way but don't be afraid,'" Karen said.
"I can just bring Rayvin into it: Rayvin certainly is not afraid of me and I love it. At some point, as Candiace's challenge was, they're not our child; they're the young woman we raised. So she was having challenges confronting her mother or just conversing with her mother. And I encouraged her: talk to your mother, what's gonna happen? What's the worst that's going to happen? Dorothy's going to love you. Dorothy's a great mom... we are both strong women, Dorothy and I, but certainly I believe that Dorothy respects Candiace much more now for having had that conversation. It was Candiace's day."
And although Karen's daughter Rayvin is only 21 and just graduated from college, Karen is already using this as a learning experience for Rayvin's future wedding.
"And I'll tell you what it taught me: When it's Rayvin's day, no way. I'm just going to say, 'OK. What do you want baby? Whatever you want, honey,'" Karen said. "And I just want to be a part of it. And I don't want it to be a struggle. I was very sad to see her in pain that way. And the advice I gave her was truly from that of a mother of a grown woman who has had real, grown conversations with her daughter now. And no, I don't like what I hear all the time but does it stop my love for Rayvin? No, it gains respect for the woman I'm raising."
Catch Candiace, Karen, and the rest of the RHOP gang every Sunday at 9/8c. Preview, below.