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Lisa's In-Law Issues

Lisa opens up about her struggles with Lenny's parents.

By Lisa Hochstein

How many of us have issues with our in-laws? I think it’s safe to say most of us do. I can usually charm the pants of anyone (if I want to) but I’m yet to win over Marina, she's a tough one.

Dinner with the In-Laws

I do appreciate Marina teaching me new Russian recipes and showing me where to get Russian food, because Lenny loves it. What I don't like is when people around me who know the English language perfectly well choose to speak Russian or any other language. It makes me feel completely left out of the conversation, and I find it a bit rude. I also don't ever want to hear about Lenny’s ex-girlfriends, especially from my mother-in-law. As far as I'm concerned they are all irrelevant. If he wanted to be with any of them, he would've put a ring on their finger. I really do try my best and have been trying for the past six years to get along with my mother-in-law. It gets frustrating when we don't get anywhere. I would love to have a relationship where we loved and respected each other. I do admit that I'm not always the best at returning calls promptly, it's something I working on. Returning calls is more difficult when you know that person doesn't like you. Sometimes I think Marina would be more accepting if I was Russian and/or Jewish. That would be her ideal daughter-in-law.

I don't know why Marina would think or say she feels that her son doesn't love her and is trying to make her life miserable. This could not be further from the truth. I think she feels this way because she can’t stand her son defending me when she doesn't get her way. Lenny of course loves his mother and father very much. He enjoys when they visit, he just wishes they were a little easier on me.

Although we don't get along so well all the time, there are so many things I love and respect about Marina and Anatoly. They came to this country with nothing. They worked very hard and made an incredible life for themselves and for Lenny. They raised an incredible man with values, morals, integrity, and honor and for this is I am forever grateful. If it wasn't for them, I would not be with this incredible man. This is the reason I will forever try with Marina. I hope someday we can learn to love each other or at least genuinely really like each other At the bridal fitting I felt like I was in the middle. I don't think there's anything wrong being friends with the entire group, even if it’s divided. I am loyal to all of my friends and I never act like a double agent. Choosing sides is very juvenile to me, and I don't let anyone influence my decision on who to be friends with. I like to give everyone a fair chance and get to know them for myself.

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I don't agree that Lea and Adriana’s situations are the same and therefore they should not be compared. Four months versus four years of being married is a big difference, and we all know that’s not the only reason these two are fighting. The underlying issues of deceit, betrayal, and ego are the problem. I did not feel the need to fill the girls in about the LA trip, because it would've created more unnecessary tension.

I really wanted to go help Joanna plan her wedding. I unfortunately had to plan my wedding by myself, because my family and closest friends live in Canada, so I know how frustrating and overwhelming the whole planning process can be. I was touched that she wanted me to help. RJ’s birthday party was adorable. I was happy to see that Adriana and Lea put their differences aside that day for the children’s sake. The boys should not have to suffer because of their mothers’ problems. If they can’t work it out, I hope they get to a place where their sons, who seem to be best friends, can have the relationship they want.
I love hearing from all of you! Share your thoughts with me on this week’s episode.


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