OK, before I get to the nonsense, let me remind you that there's a new episode of The Real Housewives of New Jersey tonight. And while I'm on the plug-train, what'd you think of Kathy's premiere last night and are you gearing up for the Top Chef Masters premiere?
I had no blog yesterday because I just couldn't. I had NOTHING. I would've said how much fun I'd had at the beach, and that I finally saw Dolly on "60 Minutes" and may the Lord shine on she and Morley Safer. And I missed the Tony's but everybody said it was actually kind of good for the first time maybe ever. And that blog would've bored you and I and so I didn't think twice about just sparing us all.
And Liza diagnosed my condition as "blogger's block." Get it? And what a fitting date for this syndrome to occur, the day of the Webby Awards! This is the awards show honoring the best of the net that's turned into something of an institution over the past few years, drawing huge stars and a fun crowd. It's under the perview of a team led by Rodger Berman, husband of Rachel Zoe. Who'dathunk?
So last night it was Rodger and Rachel welcoming people like Cameron Diaz, Martha Stewart, Lisa Kudrow, Sarah Silverman, Jimmy Fallon, Charlie Rose, and a bunch of hot dudes who work in various aspects of the web who look gay but are very straight and supercute.
The whole shebang took place at Cipriani Wall Street, which was last home to the NYC Housewives Reunion; I had some mild tremors walking into the event. Liza and I were seated at an awesome table with one of the three Twitter founders (I think I'm on the verge of tweeting btw - but that's another blog, or tweet) and his date, Colleen. So Colleen and I are talking about reality TV, of which she is a slave and a fan and scholar, and she finally reveals her secret: that she was a cast member of a popular reality show. It took us about :15 to put the pieces together and realize that we were talking with Survivor Season 1 Superstar Colleen!
She was adorable on the show, and was essentially the original, non-Republican Elizabeth Hasselback. And by that I mean the original adorable hometown girl with whom everyone fell in love. She had a little romance w/ the hot blond guy Greg who talked into conch shells. Remember? So we love Colleen.
The show was hosted by SNL's Seth Myers and he was hilarious. The whole deal with this awards show is that winners are only allowed to give five word acceptance speeches, which keeps everything moving quickly and makes pretty much every winner potentially interesting.
Someone who won from the Economist online said: "Read a f**ing newsppaper, please."
Arianna Huffington followed with: "I didn't kill newspapers, OK?"
Sarah Silverman said something to the effect of: "Did the Holocaust happen? Yes."
The hot but mentally incompetant Victoria's Secret Models who won (maybe for giving boys something with which to jerk it?): "Victoria's Secret sexy lingerie, yeah."
Some dude from the Netherlands won and brought down the house with: "Erna, will u marry me?" Erna said yes, took the stage, and they had a big tonguey smooch. The jaded crowd screamed!
My Twitter-creator tablemate said: "Creativity is a renewable resource."
Jimmy Fallon won Person of the Year and said: "Thank God Conan got promoted."
CAB REPORT: I had a clean, efficient, hybrid taxi this morning and literally did not ever look up from my Blackberry the entire time. It was $10.90 and I gave him 2 bucks.