So You Hate Your Ex, Here’s What To Do When You See Them

So You Hate Your Ex, Here’s What To Do When You See Them

Rules to follow when the sight of your former flame disgusts you.

By Marianne Garvey

Now that Sean Penn and Charlize Theron “hate each other,” running into each other is going to be a bit of a problem.

According to a Page Six report, the duo, who split last June after a year and a half of public PDA, are set to meet face to face at the Cannes Film Festival in May for Sean’s upcoming movie, “The Last Face,” which Charlize stars in. Things are apparently so bad, some are wondering if the Oscar winning actress will show up at all. 

“They hate each other,” a showbiz insider said.

We’ve all been there. Things ended horribly, and you really don’t want to see your ex until your revenge body is as good as Khloe Kardashian's. But you don't have all day to work out, and you can’t hide, especially if you’re running into each other at work related events. So what to do?

Lisa Brateman, a psychotherapist and relationship specialist in New York, says overall, play it cool.

1. Take Control Over the Interaction

Since you are in control you can dictate what is happening and what will happen.

2. I Know You Saw Me

Do not pretend you didn’t see them if you have, especially if you know they saw you.

Instead, the most effective and empowering response is to be the first one to acknowledge them by saying hello. By doing this, you're showing that you're not scared, insecure and that seeing them is not earth shattering for you.  

3. Move On

This is the perfect opportunity to show them how much you've moved on since the breakup. Regardless how you look that day—stand tall, speak clearly and move on when you are done.

4. Don't Make Resting Bitchface

Control the expression on your face. Mild interest in seeing them is appropriate. Look them straight in the eye when speaking. Keep eye contact consistent.  This will convey confidence.

5. It's All About Me

 Ask yourself, how do I want to feel during and after this experience?

Lisa adds some dont's to her advice, summing it up with don't run away, don't try to reconnect, and don't, under any circumstances bring up your "intimate" past. 

"Don’t let the discomfort change how you behave," she says. "This is the chance to lead."

Remember you once liked each other, enough to date, anyway. In May 2015, Sean and Charlize showed up hand in hand on the red carpet for “Mad Max: Fury Road.” At least non-celebrities don’t have to live with images and memories of them with their exes if they don’t want to. Charlize, who told Elle UK last year that Penn was “the love of my life," is probably turned off by her own words.

“If you run into an ex, you don't want to be over-eager or too avoidant. Don't drudge anything up in public,” advises Andrea Syrtash, Relationship Expert and author of He's Just Not Your Type (And That's a Good Thing). “It’s perfectly okay to say hello and move on. If you're uncomfortable, better to exit the situation after you've been cordial.”


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